Recent (in the past year) c/s mamas

[nerdymom]

Any c/s moms out there? Are you planning on TTC again? If so when? What are you going to do first, are you going to try for a VBAC, are you going to wait longer than you usually would to TTC, are you nervous about it, do you have doubts about wanting to or not?

I am so torn, I really have been thinking about having another, even though DS is only 8 months old. He's still nursing a lot during the day and night, so I don't think I am fertile yet, I haven't had ppaf. But I have started dreaming about having another!

Last night I had the most lovely dream. I went into labor, I ended up going to a hospital, my labor had stalled, and everyone wandered out one by one, bored and waiting to do the c/s. The last to leave was DH. As soon as he left my surges became stronger and I quickly delivered the baby unassisted. It was a boy, and I was so excited. I didn't want to wake up this morning and I definitely didn't want to let go of my dream.

I know I need to do some things before we TTC, and we should probably wait til DS is at least a year old. Is there anything else? I know nothing about this. I am going to go to the next ICAN meeting in my area, but it's three weeks away. What are YOU doing to recover, and possibly prepare for another?

[birdie22]

That sounds like a really satisfying dream.

There's so much out there to read and take in on VBAC. Since ds1 was born by c/s, I read tons and tons while I was pregnant with ds2. One of the most helpful books for me was Birthing from Within. It helped me examine my feelings about my first birth experience, and clear my head for the next one.

The VBAC forum here is a very supportive place as well, though I found it a pretty deep pool to swim in. You'll hear the good, the bad and the ugly over there. They can recommend lots of good resources for you, though.

Happily, the odds for a perfectly normal pregnancy and birth are in your favor.

Waiting at least 15 months to get pregnant after your previous c/s (so there's 2 years between babies) will make it easier to find supportive medical care. I believe there's conflicting info about whether it makes a difference to wait that long, but doctors will say it's a factor in your favor.

Start asking around now to see if anyone you know (or anyone they know) has had a VBAC, because someone who has BTDT in your town will have invaluable advice.

There's a ton more I could write, but your journey is going to be different than mine. Just expect it to take a while to hash through it all.

Good luck and best wishes!

[nerdymom]

Thank you. My MW has HBAC'd, and I am going to see if we can get together sometime soon. I've lurked in the VBAC forum, but I was conflicted as to where to post this, ie the fertility forum, VBAC, LWAB, etc. I just signed up for the forums at ICAN, so I will hopefully get some good info there. I am rather curious to see how many c/s mamas here are thinking about birth yet, and what they are thinking. Maybe it is too soon for me. Everything I see says wait 1 year before TTC, or 15 months, or 2 years. That is probably not bad advice, it's just not what I want to hear. Maybe I am loopy for thinking about TTC so soon.

[LisaG]

Me

But, I probably won't be too helpful. Unfortunately I'm not a VBAC candidate - I had my uterus reconstructed due to a birth defect so that's why I had a c/s in the first place.

Although, after spending a week with our little one in the NICU due to breathing problems as a result of the c/s, part of me does wonder about looking into it more again. I've got a whole stack of research articles from when we were first ttc.

I'm really lucky because I do well with surgery and can't say my c/s was awful by any means. I recovered really well and had minimal pain. But if I could avoid putting our next little one through the nightmare week in the NICU, it sure would be nice. Although finding a doc to consider a VBAC for me is a bit like trying to find a needle in a haystack.

Our local lay midwives agreed that due to my increased risk of rupture with the scar I have (goes up the front, across the fundus and down the back and now transverse ) that a home birth wouldn't be my best option. Even if I could get a doc to agree to let me labor first, but that's what makes them twitchy in the first place. I had one doc tell me my "uterus would split wide open" if I went into labor :

Ah well, Natalie's only 9 weeks, so it's not like there's a huge rush. Plus we don't have the money yet to do a frozen transfer, although there's always the chance it will happen the old fashioned way this time around

So there you have it, not much help at all. But I wish you the very best

[Swandira]

I had a c/s this time, and this was my last baby, so I won't be TTC again. I did have a c/s with my first baby, and having a VBAC with my second was an amazing experience. I probably would have spaced them about three years regardless of how my first baby's birth went, so I can't say I did much differently.

When I was preparing for my VBAC I just read a few articles online. I had done most of my birth prep before my first baby, and was pretty aware. I didn't really do much differently the second time around, but I didn't have the bad luck I did the first time. This third time I was again struck by bad luck, and didn't even get to labor.

Anyway, if you possibly can I encourage you to go for the VBAC. The recovery from an uncomplicated vaginal birth is just trivial compared with even a really easy c/s. Also, as a side benefit, you'll feel completely all-powerful after you personally give birth to a human being, all under your own power, with no help. Having done it three different ways -- an unplanned c/s at 10 cm, an uncomplicated VBAC, and a last-minute-planned c/s without labor -- I can confidently say that vaginal birth is the way to go if you can safely do it.

Nealy
mama to T, 6; L, 3; and O, 12/12/08

[FischK]

Me, too. I had a c/s after my son got stuck during induction. It was a stupid situation, and I am still mad and sad about the whole thing. And I am determined to VBAC with my next child.

The doctor who delivered DS told me that I'd have to have another c/s if I'm pregnant again, because of the size of my babies (note I only have 1) and that I should be glad because I had been in labor once. He also told me it was the policy at his practice, but as I found out that does not seem to be entirely true because at least the CNM seems to support VBAC. Before I conceive again, I will need find out more about this because I would like to avoid traveling 40+ miles to the next hospital.

Also, I am aware that I will need to lose 50+ pounds and get in shape before TTC in order to avoid another big baby. I'm currently working out regularly to achieve this goal in time.

We're planning to wait with TTC until my son is at least 10 month and possibly longer (depends on the policy of the women's clinic). Because of my job, it is most advantageous to give birth either around Thanksgiving or in late spring, so I will aim for either date.

[annie2186]

I had an emergency c/s with my first (she was trying to come out with her hand above her head AND her umbilical cord was wrapped around her)

I got pregnant with my second when my DD1 was 15months (I'm catholic so it just kinda happened that way - this time I am trying NFP, but like you, I am not fertile yet just like last time)

I didn't know about these forums and I am ashamed to say I kind of wanted the "easy" way out. I was scared from my first birthing experience, and I really just wanted a c/s so a repeat of the first would NOT happen....PLUS my doctor was kind of pushing it (of course)

Anyways, I had a" non-birthing plan" of "if it happens it happens - otherwise I have a planned c/s at 39 weeks.

I got SO LUCKY that I went into semi-natural labor induced by the 24 hour barf fest I was really dehydrated and I went to the hospital - that morning I had a vaginal birth (with an epidural, because I am a scaredy-cat.........) and I am sooooooooo happy that happened! It is soooooo much easier!!!!

Either way - having a baby is an amazing expierience, and I would lose my leg to have my baby healthy - but I would definitely TRY to have a VBAC - even if it ends up in a c/s (which I do believe is unlikely) it was worth the TRY!

HTH!

P.S. - when and if you do get pregnant again - it is normal for your scar to hurt like mad while it is stretching!! I googled that one - it kept me up for an entire night! Stupid c/s!!!

[heather+mike2005]

My ds, born last December, was a c/s and I don't want to go through that again. I'll be ttc next January. vbac for me, definitely.

[nerdymom]

Originally Posted by LisaG

Me

But, I probably won't be too helpful. Unfortunately I'm not a VBAC candidate - I had my uterus reconstructed due to a birth defect so that's why I had a c/s in the first place.

Although, after spending a week with our little one in the NICU due to breathing problems as a result of the c/s, part of me does wonder about looking into it more again. I've got a whole stack of research articles from when we were first ttc.

I'm really lucky because I do well with surgery and can't say my c/s was awful by any means. I recovered really well and had minimal pain. But if I could avoid putting our next little one through the nightmare week in the NICU, it sure would be nice. Although finding a doc to consider a VBAC for me is a bit like trying to find a needle in a haystack.

Our local lay midwives agreed that due to my increased risk of rupture with the scar I have (goes up the front, across the fundus and down the back and now transverse ) that a home birth wouldn't be my best option. Even if I could get a doc to agree to let me labor first, but that's what makes them twitchy in the first place. I had one doc tell me my "uterus would split wide open" if I went into labor :

Ah well, Natalie's only 9 weeks, so it's not like there's a huge rush. Plus we don't have the money yet to do a frozen transfer, although there's always the chance it will happen the old fashioned way this time around

So there you have it, not much help at all. But I wish you the very best

I'm so sorry you had to go through that!

I've been snooping around the ICAN website, there is a lot of info out there. So I will be trying to get some books from the library and I'm also going to talk to my MW about what she recommends, since she has HBAC'd herself. I completely forgot about the "big baby" argument, I am sure to face that this time, since DS was 10lbs 5 oz...

[Arwyn]

Moving from LWAB to the VBAC forum.

[nalusj]

Well, I had a c/c because my little one was breach and just wouldn't flip. Tried for a vaginal birth but the induction at 42 weeks for too much for my LO. Same ol' story: induction, pitocin, baby didn't "tolerate labor."
ANYWAY, yes we will be trying VBAC even considering HBAC. My midwife suggests waiting 18 mos to get pregnant again. I think we will stick to that....

[MamaMem]

Sadly, I am here. I am only 6 1/2 wk pp, but thinking baout another baby. Wow. That must be hormones... I am so not done having kids and I am sooo going to try for a VBAC. Again. First c/s was after pushing for 4 hours and getting nowhere bc ds had a bit off in positioning. Second c/s was bc ds had his hand above his head, was tryi to turn to fit, puting pressure on my sacrum causing involuntary pushing, thereby pinching my cervix between his head and my pelvis. I was at 8 and doin well when that started to go down. When my mw checked me she said she could just about sit and watch it swell. We had worked so hard for a VBAC and going for c/s was the hardest choice I have ever made. Ever.

TTC? YOU hear so many different things about ttc and vbac. ugh. My mw's and OB say if you have 18 mo between births, you should be ok. I really don't want to ask for them closer than that but neither do I want them much farther apart. Who knows what God will give us.

[nerdymom]

So nalusj has been told to wait 18mo before conceiving, and MamaMem has been told 18mo between births, and my head is spinning! It's so confusing, really, one "expert" says one things, and this "expert" says another, and I'm :!

[kitkat5505]

I had a c/s for #1, a vbac with #2, and a c/s for #3. Because my last one was a failed vbac transfer from birth center and emergency c/s under general I am terrified to even think about giving birth again. We plan to have more kids but I get scared thinking about dealing with the stress of deciding about my birth options. I plan to go for a vba2c next time, but will have to find a supportive OB because my awesome midwife isn't allowed to attend vba2c in this state and I am not comfortable planning a homebirth now.

I am thinking we will ttc in a year or so, but we don't really plan exactly when, just whenever we think it's time. I just know that right now I would be scared if I got pg, I still have a lot of fear and stuff to get over before I deal with it. I would love to go to a local ICAN meeting, but the closest one is an hour away and it's always held during the day when I babysit a little boy and have my own 3 kids to care for, it's just not convenient.

When I was pg with my vbac baby I had such wonderful birth dreams. I was almost always either alone or with someone present but me doing everything, and only one dream was in a hospital. They always made me feel so good about birth.

[JayJay]

Well I am here, pregnant and got pregnant 6 months almost on the nose after my daughter was born via general anesthetic c section (she died and I almost did as well).

I am going for a VBAC. It will be oooh...about 15 months between cesarean and VBAC I suppose, but that isn't phasing me at all. My doc is letting me try and by golly, I will be laboring in the car park with my partner and my friend, a midwife, until it's time to push! I can't go through another cesarean...no way no how.

So I know where you're coming from mama.

*HUGE hugs* XXX

[alternamama82]

Yes, I will (hopefully) be pg soon, and will be going for a VBAC. My daughter was born 4 months ago via emergency c/s, and she died 15 days after her birth. My doctor told me that one year between births was fine for a VBAC, but I read alot of conflicting info. Mostly what I see recommended is 18-24 mos between births, but there is NO way I'm going to wait that long! So yes, I guess there is a *slightly* increased risk of rupturing, but from my research even if you do rupture and are in a hospital that can perform a rapid c/s, both you and the baby will most likely be fine.

[nerdymom]

Originally Posted by JayJay

Well I am here, pregnant and got pregnant 6 months almost on the nose after my daughter was born via general anesthetic c section (she died and I almost did as well).

I am going for a VBAC. It will be oooh...about 15 months between cesarean and VBAC I suppose, but that isn't phasing me at all. My doc is letting me try and by golly, I will be laboring in the car park with my partner and my friend, a midwife, until it's time to push! I can't go through another cesarean...no way no how.

So I know where you're coming from mama.

*HUGE hugs* XXX

Oh mama, I am so sad for you! I can't even begin to imagine how difficult that whole experience was for you. Best wishes and prayers for your safe delivery!

Originally Posted by alternamama82

Yes, I will (hopefully) be pg soon, and will be going for a VBAC. My daughter was born 4 months ago via emergency c/s, and she died 15 days after her birth. My doctor told me that one year between births was fine for a VBAC, but I read alot of conflicting info. Mostly what I see recommended is 18-24 mos between births, but there is NO way I'm going to wait that long! So yes, I guess there is a *slightly* increased risk of rupturing, but from my research even if you do rupture and are in a hospital that can perform a rapid c/s, both you and the baby will most likely be fine.

Thanks for the info. I am so sorry for your loss, but thank you for sharing your experience. Blessings to you!

[momtoafireteam]

I am. We are planning on TTC within the next few months. Just waiting for some stuff to fall into place. I had my third c/s in March 2008. I would have started TTC earlier but DH has been deployed.

My last c/s was a failed VBAC. My first two c/s's were elected by me for a good reason. I dont regret them and I have no hang ups about them. Failing my VBAC, though? It broke me. And at the start I thought it was because I had had a c/s, and etc etc, but as time has gone on I have realized that the harder thing for me was not having a c/s, but failing a VBAC. Or really just failing. It was my fault it failed, as well. I didnt fight hard enough to stop the 'cascade of intervention' and they used pitocin, broke my water, and 24 hours later OF COURSE I was on a c/s table. Of course I was.

I am not even pregnant yet and I already think about how I will deliver my next child/ children. I think that its going to come down to deciding what will be harder for me to take: a c/s, that you cant "fail" really, its just not a vaginal birth. Or another failed VBAC. I am ashamed to say that ATM the repeat c/s is winning, for my own sanity.

However, one thing I am NOT doing to prepare for the next birth is overpreparing. Last pregnancy I read EVERYTHING, I knew EVERYTHING, I did EVERYTHING I could. And it still didnt work. And that was my biggest sense of shame- "how could this have happened when I know everything I did was wrong??" Its part of the reason I am obsessing now. Because I want to, within reason, make some decisions before the pregnancy begins. It will be my last, and I want to ENJOY it, not spend the whole thing feeling emotionally ravaged and switching between extreme guilt and confusion.

I really just dont know anymore. Sorry this reply turned into a little bit of a sob story. It wasnt really what you were looking for, was it? I really wish you the absolute best of luck in whatever you decide. Oh, one more thing. I got pregnant both 5 and 9 months post c/s with my DC4 and then DC5 and it was fine. And done with the blessing of my RE and Peri's.

[Storm Bride]

I may or may not post my sob story - again - later. NAKing right now.

But, re: spacing. I think 18 months is fine, by most studies. However, 2 years between babies gives you a little less hassle with a lot of care providers.

[catspage]

Definitely find out what the restrictions are in your area. My babies are going to be 23 months apart. When I met with the midwife, she told me that some practices would tell me "no" automatically for a VBAC because my labors would not be 2 years apart. That was news to me. Everything I read said that 18 months was the standard.