I feel like I'm being ganged up on. :(

[Kimmiepie]

Okay, so dh and I decided a few years ago to stop vaccinating ourselves and the children. Up until then we'd done everything. Our children only go to the dr. once a year for a general checkup because they're never sick enough to need a dr...just mild colds, stomach bugs etc. on occasion.

So today on facebook a "friend" of mine posted that she was frustrated with the amount of shots that her children have to get to attend school this year, particularly the chicken pox one. I replied that she could get an exemption easily, and posted the link. Right after that there was a reply from someone else about how proud they are to live in a country that has shots because she's seen the horrors in other countries. Then my "friend" replied that she did not want an exemption for her kids, that she is happy they can get shots but she was just complaining because she thought she was done for this year. It was very rudely stated though. I simply replied okay...but I was just letting you know that you can get an exemption for JUST the chicken pox if you don't want that one. Then she posted something about me not being tolerant or whatever.

So then I log off of facebook and into my email. There is an email from my SIL who is in medical school. She was writing to my husband that she's learning all these reasons why our kids should get vaccinations and antibiotics. She gave an example of rheumatic fever and what it can do to the heart etc. Well, first of all I know very well that RM comes from Strep which my kids have NEVER had. There is no vaccination against that either, so I don't really see her point.

I was frustrated with all the anti-vaccination stuff being spewed at me today, because we've been this way for years and now all of a sudden today everyone is talking about this out of the blue. I called my dh and expressed my frustration because I wanted to vent. I do that whenever I don't want to say something to someone that I will regret (ex: responding rudely on FB or email SIL about how I don't agree with her and starting a fight). To my amazement my dh said "Well I think we should vaccinate someday." What?? He said that he just didn't think that they should have so many so young, but that someday we should get some for them.

All things things are now flashing through my mind about giving them shots and them having chronic health issues and reactions. My ds1 already has mild autism and ADD issues (he was vaxed until age 4). I'm just...I thought we were partners in this. He did the same thing recently with the homeschool issue. I'm just feeling kind of ganged up on and upset right now.

[Mama2Jesse]

Crud. I'm sorry your DH is waffling.
Nobody IRL knows my son's vax status. When somewhat pressed, as in "How's he doing with his shots?" I respond "Just fine". Because, well... his shots are no shots, so yep. Doin' fine, lol. I just would not respond well to uneducated folks, who've not cracked a book in their entire lives voluntarily, freaking at me over vaccines.

Phooey. I think I would stop engaging them about vaccines, let your DH calm down and don't bring it up again. If it's importnant to him, he'll bring it up later, but I bet he's just feeling the pressure and you won't hear much more about it once this blows over.

Your SIL... hmm. She is, uh, misinformed (a vaccine for strep? Wha?) and honestly, I would ignore her spiel. Might respond with "I'm glad you are enjoying your classes".

Anywho. Try becoming a black hole of vaccination info. Works for me.

[Kimmiepie]

Originally Posted by Mama2Jesse

Crud. I'm sorry your DH is waffling.
Nobody IRL knows my son's vax status. When somewhat pressed, as in "How's he doing with his shots?" I respond "Just fine". Because, well... his shots are no shots, so yep. Doin' fine, lol. I just would not respond well to uneducated folks, who've not cracked a book in their entire lives voluntarily, freaking at me over vaccines.

Phooey. I think I would stop engaging them about vaccines, let your DH calm down and don't bring it up again. If it's importnant to him, he'll bring it up later, but I bet he's just feeling the pressure and you won't hear much more about it once this blows over.

Your SIL... hmm. She is, uh, misinformed (a vaccine for strep? Wha?) and honestly, I would ignore her spiel. Might respond with "I'm glad you are enjoying your classes".

Anywho. Try becoming a black hole of vaccination info. Works for me.

I wish with all my might that I hadn't told anyone. It's just not worth it. But too late now I guess.

I don't know why dh is feeling the pressure because no one has even mentioned it to him in a very long time. Apparently this is something he has always thought but failed to mention to me. :

As for my SIL I can't even respond. She's a very sweet (yet highly influenced by med school and her daddy is a dr.) person and I love her so I don't want to debate with her at this point. I'll let him respond however he chooses and not read it because I know it will make me upset.
I think what she meant about rheumatic fever was that if you don't take antibiotics for strep that you can get it. Like I said though, the kids have never had strep.

I don't know what the deal is lately. It came out of nowhere.

[MamatoPeach]

When I first found out about how risky and ridiculous vaccinations are.... I wanted to warn everyone. I was shocked that they didn't want my advice or knowledge.

I have had my feelings hurt from friends and family.

Since the 'flu shot season' is approaching, as well as kids getting shots for school. I plan on laying low and dodging some bullets to keep my kids save from shots.

I am so sorry that you have to feel what you are feeling. Come on here and let out your steam.

[Juvysen]

My favorite is "well, you aren't old enough to remember what it was like..." Oh, really? Am i not old enough to research it either? *sigh*

[SuburbanHippie]

I can't believe your SIL thinks you need to vaccinate because of rheumatic fever. It makes no sense. One has nothing to do with the other.

I'm sorry your DH is starting to cave. He's probably just starting to feel the pressure that we non-vaxers feel from time to time. Get him another book to read about non-vaxing and that might reassure him again that you're making the best decision possible for your children right now.

As for friends, I don't tell them we don't vax anymore. It's none of their business. I used to get a lot of "oh I bet your son's X month appointment is coming up soon, ugh more shots!" from fellow mommy friends. Little do they know he hasn't seen a doctor since he was a month old. LOL. I like the idea of being a black hole of information. I'll have to remember that one.

[Marnica]

Sorry you are experiencing this mama. But know you are NOT alone. We all feel ya here!! IRL I can count on 1 hand the number of people who know my son's vax status. The world is full of people who are completely uneducated about this issue and regurgitate the false information that they are spoonfed by the media and their doctors (many of whom do no research themselves and merely regurgitate the information they are spoonfed by the phamrn=maceutical companies and what they were taught in medical school.)

Anyway I find it is not worth my frustration. I do wish it were different as I think the only way to get people to research is to get them to question things in the first place, but not at the expense of my relationships and my and my son's happiness.

As for your DH someday is very vague. I agree with PP who said let it go for now. If he really feels you should do some vaccines he will bring it up again and you can deal with it from a less emotional standpoint. Perhaps at that point you can tell him that until he can show you unbiased evidence that the vaccines he wants to get are safe and that the risks of your LO getting that particular disease and suffering permanant damage from it outweighs the risks of getting the vaccine (especially since your LO has issues already!!) that there will be no vaccines given.

Hang in there. This is a bump in the no vaxing road of life :

[peainthepod]

Your SIL is neither a doctor nor your child's doctor. Remind DH of this fact if she's starting to worry him with her weird, uninformed nonsense. Even she admits there's no vaccine for rheumatic fever, so...yeah. Pointless fearmongering. If you want to be a jerk ask her to find out which pharmaceutical companies wrote her textbooks.

Sorry you're going through this, mama. It's hard to swim against the current, but it's so worth it. You're taking responsibility for your child's healthcare instead of blindly trusting the current authorities. Give yourself a pat on the back and keep on keeping on. You have facts and logic on your side. They have marketing and raw emotion. Which would you rather trust when making important decisions that will have a lifelong impact on your child's precious body? Stay strong.

Oh, and nothing says you have to tell the world whether you vaccinate or not. Medical records are supposed to be confidential for a reason. "That's really none of your business" is a perfectly acceptable answer when someone asks a prying question.

[Emmeline II]

You can start a binder with the answers to these questions for every VAD. Have a copy of the questions handy to give to your dh so he can research it for himself.

Here are some questions.

1. Name of the disease
2. Description of the disease
3. Length of time from initial infection to end of all symptoms
4. Infectious period
5. Normal symptoms of the disease
6. Known serious consequences of the disease
7. Proportion of persons infected developing serious consequences
8. Transmission route of the disease
9. Prevalence of the disease
10. Treatments of the disease and efficacy of those treatments
11. Relevant research about the disease
12. Name of the vaccine
13. Company that makes the vaccine
14. Contents of the vaccine
14A. The significance of whether or not the vaccine is live
15. History of development of the vaccine
16. Known side-effects of the vaccine and rate of incidence of those side-effects
17. Possible side-effects not yet acknowledged by the vaccine maker
18. Relevant research into the vaccine
19. How effective is the vaccine at preventing the disease?
20.What is the vaccine meant to do? (Many vaccines are not meant to prevent infection or transmission).
21.Number of cases reported each year.
22.Number of deaths reported each year from the vaccine and natural disease.

Here are some sources to help you out:

Inside Vaccines

Vaccines-The Risks, the Benefits, the Choices DVD, By Sherri J. TENPENNY
YOUTUBE: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7018835240451107552


http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/mmwr_wk.html (download the current issue)
http://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/pubs/pin...k-chapters.htm
http://vaers.hhs.gov/pdf/PackageInserts.pdf
http://video.google.com/videoplay?do...40451107552&q=
http://video.google.com/videoplay?do...87981735&hl=en
http://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/pubs/pin...ses&deaths.pdf