Mothering › Forums › Parenting › "You're children are too gangster for that"
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

"You're children are too gangster for that"

post #1 of 42
Thread Starter 

We took the kids in to get their pictures done today. We've used this place twice in the past and have always been astounded with how great they are. They encourage props from home and clothing changes and ask for our input, rather than the "stand here, look here" snap, over and over at a lot of places. That's why we go there, we LOVE being able to personalize the kids pics and show what they're into right now (dd was playing dress up in a few one year, we have a poignant one of ds looking at his grandfather's pocket watch, etc.). The last two times we've been, the pictures were so great that we agonized over which ones to get, dropped way too much money, etc.

Today was a totally different experience. First off, they called and informed us we were limited to one outfit change. Ok, well, not perfect but we can work with that no problem. Next, if we are over 10 min late we'll have to reschedule. I can COMPLETELY understand and respect this, and it makes a lot of sense when you're scheduling appointments. So we had our stuff, were out the door and ended up getting there 3 min late (parking was a nightmare). They were running so behind that it was 30 min after our scheduled time before they got to us. No call before we left, no notice once we were there, just wait - which is why the 10 min late thing that they emphasized in the call is a bit annoying. But we can go with that, it happens.

The photographer calls us in. She immediately starts positioning the kids and snapping pictures. I finally get a second to shove a flower in dd's hand from the garden. "Not yet!" the photographer snapped at me and handed it back, then was clearly annoyed that we wanted props in the pictures. She did get better about this as it progressed and lost the attitude. All of the poses were very "non-traditional" - ds laying down with dd leaning over him and both looking up, traditional pics taken at funny angles, etc. We like non-traditional but we also wanted to get a few good, solid photos. Many of the older generations do not like the non-trad stuff as well. She seemed very determined to get the shots that she wanted, and what we requested was pretty much ignored. She insisted on using the same brown background for all shots.

At the last, the kids had seen a small chaise lounge they wanted to have a picture done on. They'd watched the previous shoot use it and thought it was neat. We had them dressed in "school" outfits more, the boy in a long sleeved color blocked 3 button polo and tan jeans, the girl in blue jeans, a bright pink ls shirt and a black jacket. Granted the jacket is of a leather like material, but it's a nice, fitted zip up blazer type - more of a stylish, trendy look than anything else. I mentioned that the kids would like a photo on the couch if that would be possible. "Your children look too gangster for that!" Excuse me? Wth does that mean? Because dd has a black fitted jacket on it makes my 5 and 7 year old children look "gangster"? And what is that exactly? She did go ahead and take one pic of each child on the lounge though.

We went to look at the pictures. They were terrible. The one of DS on the chaise lounge was good, really good, the only good one of him actually. But it was tilted which made it look really wierd given the more serious setting in the pic. Half of the ones of dd had her looking down (intentionally) or side view. There were 1-2 of her that were "ok". We left without buying anything and rescheduled. An hour and a half wasted when time is the last thing we have to waste right now what with the upcoming move and all.

Would you be unhappy with this?
post #2 of 42
I would totally be mad. When you go in next time definitely ask for a different photographer. Maybe try to catch them on a monday or tuesday when they aren't as busy.
post #3 of 42
Yes, I would be mad. It is their JOB - you are paying them - to take photos for YOU. What you like. I'd call and talk to a manager. Say how happy you've been in the past, and how surprised you were to have a photographer that completely disregarded what type of photos you wanted. I'd say her attitude was rude and dismissive, and she said your kids were "too gangster" to use the chaise in a photo. And that none of the shots were what you'd buy.

I'd expect another (free) sitting with a DIFFERENT photographer within a week. I'd expect them to listen to what you want. You need to 1) be there prior to your appt time, and 2) be VERY assertive if they want to take pix that you know you won't buy. Shut them down - "I WON'T buy any of the off kilter/diagonal shots. Don't take any." I do that with the "soft focus" shots; I hate them and tell them not to take ANY. If they give my kid a prop that I hate, I step in and take it, explaining I won't buy a pic with props I don't like. You can do this nicely if the photographer is reasonable, and more aggressively if they aren't.

Be sure you get the name of the photographer you had, so you can avoid her in the future.
post #4 of 42
Yeah, that sounds like a horrible experience, and the gangster comment was really bad... Did you have to pay a sitting fee or anything? If so, I would maybe ask a manager if you can have that fee waived on your next visit.
post #5 of 42
I'd write a letter. Explain that b/c they overbooked and rushed so much, you didn't buy anything. Explain why you have been so happy with their service in the past. Suggest that they be up front about being heavily booked on certain days; so that people can choose if they want to just go in for a few quick shots, or if they would rather reschedule and get to have clothing changes and multiple backdrops etc.
post #6 of 42
That is the one of the most disrespectful and rude things I have ever heard. I would be absolutely livid. I can't believe the photographer said that in front of your children. I would be writing a letter and loudly complaining about this after the wonderful service you have had in years past.
post #7 of 42
Yes, I would be upset. The gangster comment was just rude and uncalled for - I don't even get why she'd say that! I would complain, for sure.
post #8 of 42
I would speak with the owner/manager. Did you have to pay for the sitting? If so I would ask for the new sitting (w/ a different photographer of course) and expect it to be free of charge.
post #9 of 42
Yes I would be upset.

I agree with the pp's that you should speak to a manager and stress that the reason you've come back is that you've been so happy with their service in the past and that this is just the opposite of what you've come to expect from them and ask for a new sitting with a different photographer. I'd also ask about scheduling on a day when they expect to be less busy. Even if the photographer hadn't made the gangster comment I'd ask for all that based on the poor service you received up till then. The gangster comment is over the top rude and frankly a little strange.
post #10 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by SunshineJ View Post

We took the kids in to get their pictures done today. We've used this place twice in the past and have always been astounded with how great they are. They encourage props from home and clothing changes and ask for our input, rather than the "stand here, look here" snap, over and over at a lot of places. That's why we go there, we LOVE being able to personalize the kids pics and show what they're into right now (dd was playing dress up in a few one year, we have a poignant one of ds looking at his grandfather's pocket watch, etc.). The last two times we've been, the pictures were so great that we agonized over which ones to get, dropped way too much money, etc.

Today was a totally different experience. First off, they called and informed us we were limited to one outfit change. Ok, well, not perfect but we can work with that no problem. Next, if we are over 10 min late we'll have to reschedule. I can COMPLETELY understand and respect this, and it makes a lot of sense when you're scheduling appointments. So we had our stuff, were out the door and ended up getting there 3 min late (parking was a nightmare). They were running so behind that it was 30 min after our scheduled time before they got to us. No call before we left, no notice once we were there, just wait - which is why the 10 min late thing that they emphasized in the call is a bit annoying. But we can go with that, it happens.

The photographer calls us in. She immediately starts positioning the kids and snapping pictures. I finally get a second to shove a flower in dd's hand from the garden. "Not yet!" the photographer snapped at me and handed it back, then was clearly annoyed that we wanted props in the pictures. She did get better about this as it progressed and lost the attitude. All of the poses were very "non-traditional" - ds laying down with dd leaning over him and both looking up, traditional pics taken at funny angles, etc. We like non-traditional but we also wanted to get a few good, solid photos. Many of the older generations do not like the non-trad stuff as well. She seemed very determined to get the shots that she wanted, and what we requested was pretty much ignored. She insisted on using the same brown background for all shots.

At the last, the kids had seen a small chaise lounge they wanted to have a picture done on. They'd watched the previous shoot use it and thought it was neat. We had them dressed in "school" outfits more, the boy in a long sleeved color blocked 3 button polo and tan jeans, the girl in blue jeans, a bright pink ls shirt and a black jacket. Granted the jacket is of a leather like material, but it's a nice, fitted zip up blazer type - more of a stylish, trendy look than anything else. I mentioned that the kids would like a photo on the couch if that would be possible. "Your children look too gangster for that!" Excuse me? Wth does that mean? Because dd has a black fitted jacket on it makes my 5 and 7 year old children look "gangster"? And what is that exactly? She did go ahead and take one pic of each child on the lounge though.

We went to look at the pictures. They were terrible. The one of DS on the chaise lounge was good, really good, the only good one of him actually. But it was tilted which made it look really wierd given the more serious setting in the pic. Half of the ones of dd had her looking down (intentionally) or side view. There were 1-2 of her that were "ok". We left without buying anything and rescheduled. An hour and a half wasted when time is the last thing we have to waste right now what with the upcoming move and all.

Would you be unhappy with this?
Yes, I wouldn't be pleased with her behavior either, was this a different photographer you had? I'd think about reporting her if possible.
post #11 of 42
Wow. pp's have given you good advice. I just wanted to chime in and say that I would be annoyed too. And downright offended over the "gangster" comment. That is very unprofessional.
post #12 of 42
i would be more than annoyed. Gangster! for real? ok maybe the prob didn't match the style they were sporting, that happens. but gangster was said in a derogatory manner and that is uncalled for. not to mention if you want a picture with any prop the photographer should just take it. gees in the time she spent arguing with you she could have taken several pictures and been done. its digital. take 1 take a 1000 its all the same price. good grief. not only would ask for the pictures to be redone with another photogropher with no sitting fee, I would ask for any sitting fees back from tha last session, as well as a discount on the pictures you ultimately purchase.
post #13 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilyka View Post
but gangster was said in a derogatory manner and that is uncalled for.
What makes you feel the "gangster" was derogatory? I've heard it used as a complement when referring to style of dress a few times, and never as a negative. Though from the OP's description of what the kids were wearing it certainly sounds inaccurate.
post #14 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by eepster View Post
What makes you feel the "gangster" was derogatory? I've heard it used as a complement when referring to style of dress a few times, and never as a negative. Though from the OP's description of what the kids were wearing it certainly sounds inaccurate.
maybe because the implication was that being "gangster" precludes one from sitting on a couch for a picture. i think it's pretty clear that the photographer was TRYING to be derogatory.

i'd complain. unacceptable.
post #15 of 42
I think it was really inappropriate for the photographer to tell you your kids look "too gangster."
I would have said " Who's buying these pics, me or you?"


I would definitely tell a manager about your experience and ask for a different person next time.
post #16 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by IncaMama View Post
maybe because the implication was that being "gangster" precludes one from sitting on a couch for a picture. i think it's pretty clear that the photographer was TRYING to be derogatory.

i'd complain. unacceptable.
I would have just viewed it as an incredibly bad excuse for her not wanting to spend a few moments getting it set up. Tone, which one can't hear over the internet, is key.

Of course either way it's extremely rude.
post #17 of 42
In addition to writing the manager and requesting a re-shoot, is there any chance you can specifically request one of the photographers who worked for you before?
post #18 of 42
Thread Starter 
Ok, I'll admit, I'm 40 yrs old, more of a homebody/don't keep up with the common vernacular and styles, and honestly I had to look up the meaning for the slang term of "gangster". There is nothing remotely complimentary about it, and if I'd been fully aware of the meaning I probably would've walked out on the spot, rather than suck it up through the last 2 pictures. The meaning is actually very offensive. What's really kind of odd to me too is that the photographer was around my age.

I have written to the studio's customer service address. While I was out, I had asked DH to contact another location of the studio and ask how to get in touch with the manager of this location (I did get the photographer's name after we got back). Apparently we got our signals crossed and he didn't do it, so that's on my list to do next. I will certainly NOT see this photographer again. Right now we are re-scheduled for Monday evening, so it shouldn't be nearly as busy.

Between the stress of moving, a really bad tension headache and that time of month, I wasn't sure if my being upset was an over-reaction or not. Thanks for all of the replies!
post #19 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by inkslinger View Post
Yes, I would be upset. The gangster comment was just rude and uncalled for - I don't even get why she'd say that! I would complain, for sure.
Definitely this, and I would demand a free session, complete with a free, or discounted pictures. That is beyond frustrating that not only was the experience with the photographer terrible, but wasting your time waiting at the beginning? Not okay.
post #20 of 42
I'd be upset about the things other than the gangster comment. If the clothing was soo casual for the chaise, i can see why she wouldn't want to pair them. I guess i think its weird that you all would be really offended by that comment though. I think maybe you are taking it too seriously??? But I wasn't there, so i dont know.

You have to admit that a LOT of clothing style has become popular because of gang culture. Its a fact. If its going to upset you that someone would refer to the style of clothing your kids are wearing looks gangster, I would have my kids wear different clothes.

But its not unusual to hear, in our house, "Whats up, gangster?!" as a slang and funny/ fun way to talk.

**puting on flame suit****
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Parenting
Mothering › Forums › Parenting › "You're children are too gangster for that"