Christian and Infertile - Page 2

[lavatea]

Hey ladies. I just wanted to pop in and say hello. Hoping I might follow along in the conversation.

I'm a Catholic Christian, though DH is not (he was raised in the Christian faith but is not Catholic though he does attend Mass with me). We have two beautiful children. We do not contracept and have been actively trying for another since June 2009. I've been through three miscarriages since that time. It has been a difficult journey and definitely not something I expected. I had no problems conceiving my first two children. And really, not much trouble conceiving the other three. It's been the carrying to term that has been difficult. However, my last m/c was in June and I haven't been pregnant since. So I don't know what's going on. My insurance at my new job goes into effect next week, so I think it's time to make an OB/GYN appointment and hopefully find some answers.

I believe much like LTB - male testing that cannot be obtained during BD would be unacceptable for us. I'm up for just about any tests on myself. And medications would be OK but not any artificial reproductive techniques.

I didn't realize that QF meant not trying but not preventing. I just assumed they were always trying, lol. I admire those that are at complete peace with whichever outcome occurs each cycle. I strive for that, but the thought of giving up on trying...well...

Prayers for you all.

[still waiting]

So I am struggling with what to do as far as fertility treatments! I dont want to be manipulative and I want God's will for my life. I felt at peace with taking some meds an then trying IUI, but now I am feeling less confident. Any words of wisdom from you ladies

[LessTraveledBy]

Still Waiting, I have two thoughts for you. First, I think your uneasiness is something to take into consideration. (Where is that coming from?) Secondly, I know Catholics have a very deep teaching about all these matters and there is tons one can read. I would imagine there are also other groups out there that have teachings and writings on the topic. I think reading things might make you understand where different Christians are coming from and help you not feel alone as you try to decide.

We just got an appointment with the clinic, finally, although it won't be until June. I don't really look forward to needing to explain how little (in their eyes) we are willing to do. People who just don't get it seem to think that not accepting their "treatments" means you don't really want a baby all that much, anyway. To them (or so I have felt before) we then become people they should not waste the time and resources on. I am just afraid that, instead of truly trying to figure out what the problem is with me, they will feel that we are not willing to accept help, and thus will not do all the tests they could.

Dd just turned 6 and we have reached a new phase with other people. Instead of asking whether we hope to have more, people now seem to think that we obviously don't want more. (It amazes me how few people seem to realize that secondary infertility exists!) So... Earlier people seemed to think that we contracept. If we ever have another child, I bet some will think we did something immoral there, too. I just can't win... ha ha. (Ok, so I am sensitive. I cannot truly know what people think. Yet, sometimes they faces do say a lot. it hurts me when people think I don't like kids very much or something, when that is so opposite of the reality.) I suppose I just need to work on getting to know as many people as possible, as al our friend certainly know our situation. (Just kidding... But somehow I do feel that people stare and wonder.)