How to care for uncirc penis

[valsblondies]

Anyone have a good link or book to recommend on how to care for an uncircd boy?

[jocelyndale]

Intact penis care is really easy:
leave it alone. If you must wipe, you just wipe it off like a finger. Don't retract, don't mess with it.

When your boy figures out that he can retract his foreskin, just tell him to retract, rinse, and replace. No soap, nothing special. And he might do that as a baby or the foreskin might not retract until the teen years.

http://www.cirp.org/pages/parents/peron1/
http://www.aap.org/publiced/br_uncircumcised.htm

There are probably stickies up in the top of these forum about caring for the intact penis.

[Fellow Traveler]

This link should also help http://www.cirp.org/library/hygiene/

Are you expecting a son?

[calngavinsmom]

this one is great
http://www.nocirc.org/publish/4pam.pdf

[valsblondies]

Yes, expecting a 3rd son and the first 2 were circ'd due to DHs' wishes (he felt it was important they look like him, more acceptance culturally, that they would prefer it as adults etc- all the usual reasons) but he has miraculously changed his position with #3. Will check out links and post if I have any other questions- thanks! Im so happy about Dh changing his mind - and it didnt even take the battle I was prepared for (I had resolved I would not circ this one no matter what). I brought it up reluctantly and he said he was fine with whatever I wanted. Go figure...

[georgia]

Congratulations!!

Here's a helpful Mothering article from the Resource sticky (located up at the top of the forum):

http://www.mothering.com/health/prot...advice-parents

[Fellow Traveler]

Great! Congratulations, what a lucky boy! : If you have more questions, be sure to ask.

[donnar]

great thread and awesome links gals! thank you! both of our 2 sons are intact and they are 3 and 5. neither has ever had an issue with infection and we have been happy with our decision and love their natural look.

today i took the boys for a checkup with our doc (he is new to our family as we have just moved to a new location), and he asked if the boys were circ'd. i said NO, so doc asked me if their foreskin is tight or if it retracts ok. i said i didn't know really, so he checked. he was gentle, but wanted to see what size the "opening" was so gently pulled the foreskin, not hurting the boys. i was very nervous about him doing this as I was of the understanding it would not be retractable at this point in their lives. he told me both boys, esp the 3YO have very tight foreskin and a very small opening for the urine to come out. he said if when they pee, the foreskin 'balloons' then this is a further sign that the opening is too small. he said they will both likely have to be circ'd. but if they are having no trouble right now, its not a panic situation, jsut something to know that will be likely down the road.

i came home in a panic, but am relieved to read the 'ballooning' is normal and a sign that things are happening as they should. i was also relieved to read that foreskin would not necessarily be FULLY retractable until age 18, so WHEW we have a long way to go. i realize that many docs don't really know how this works, so i'm not angry at him, just relieved that I was right and the boys are a-ok.

[tennisdude23]

Others I am sure will chime in, but I don't really understand why he was asking about the foreskin in the first place if you reported no problems. It's not as if the foreskin is a ticking time bomb that you have to monitor. Ballooning is normal and the foreskin may not retract until the late teens. A small opening is nothing to worry about either. It's normal and not an indication for a circumcision. If the subject comes up again, I would certainly present some up to date literature to your physician about the foreskin and/or get a second opinion.

[MommytoB]

Donnar,
Glad your not angry at your doctor for doing that but since that doctor isn't up to date on intact boys . How about you bring some information to update him so he can stop doing unneeded circumcisions because I believe with that talk he proably circ'ed many kids aroun 3-7 unneccessarily and since you found this information which many parents don't know so your kids are saved from getting a unneeded circumcision because of how that doctor calls a problem which is just a normal part of intact boys .

Also, a doctor no matter how gentle he/she is can still do damage to the foreskin by manipulating the foreskin before it's ready to do so . So make sure doc doesn't try to do that with your sons again by bringing information in on premature forcible retraction

[Fyrestorm]

Originally Posted by MommytoB

Donnar,

Also, a doctor no matter how gentle he/she is can still do damage to the foreskin by manipulating the foreskin before it's ready to do so . So make sure doc doesn't try to do that with your sons again by bringing information in on premature forcible retraction

You may not be angry at him...but I am. He sexually assaulted your boys! Think of it this way..if it were a girl and the doctor had inserted his finger in her vagina to see how tight it was, you would have been outraged! I would have had him arrested!

[donnar]

thanks everyone for the responses, I will not let him do that again, and i will make sure the boys both know that it should not be done by anyone other than themselves. you know, the more the day goes on, the angrier i am getting though! i was in absolute shock when he told me that the boys would "probably have to get circ'd", i mean, flabbergasted. i said "rEEEEALLY?" he was without a doubt, confidant this would be the case. he told me that most un-circ'd boys need to be later on, and of course he gave me the whole std and infections story as well. he even had the nerve to tell me that "15yrs ago, no one was circumsizing their boys, and now they are returning to circumcision" (you know, the all-knowing and powerful "they"). when he seemed disappointed their foreskin was not retracting, i asked "should it be retractable by now?" and he answered me, without a doubt, YES. even though i KNEW that wasn't right, but i doubted myself there in his office and got really scared that i would have to put my boys through this, now at their ages......

i'm not sure how to give him updated information though, I don't know him that well, and some docs think they know everything, so i'm not sure how he'd respond to that. i will certainly give it some thought though as how to best approach it. cause i agree with you, this madness needs to stop.

[donnar]

i am SO MAD! new doctor time, hope they are not all completely clueless, here in a place where docs are hard to come by.

[ursaminor]

Hey there Mama, I just wanted to chime in and say I share your anger. If you choose to leave this doctor for a new one, I would let him now exactly why you are leaving his practice. I would also be enraged.

[tennisdude23]

I just want to add that your physician was wrong on every single point that you mentioned. Boys very rarely need to be circumcised later on, given that most of the world is not circumcised, and all the data seems to point to a decreasing circumcision rate. Good statistics are hard to come by, but the rate has not been increasing. Most doctors realize that circumcision is not necessary, potentially harmful, and plagued by ethical issues. Based on what you stated, I think your physician is living in his own delusional world and nothing that he seemed to have said is fact. If I were you, I would look for another physician. Who knows what else this guy is wrong about.

[tutucrazy]

Originally Posted by donnar

great thread and awesome links gals! thank you! both of our 2 sons are intact and they are 3 and 5. neither has ever had an issue with infection and we have been happy with our decision and love their natural look.

today i took the boys for a checkup with our doc (he is new to our family as we have just moved to a new location), and he asked if the boys were circ'd. i said NO, so doc asked me if their foreskin is tight or if it retracts ok. i said i didn't know really, so he checked. he was gentle, but wanted to see what size the "opening" was so gently pulled the foreskin, not hurting the boys. i was very nervous about him doing this as I was of the understanding it would not be retractable at this point in their lives. he told me both boys, esp the 3YO have very tight foreskin and a very small opening for the urine to come out. he said if when they pee, the foreskin 'balloons' then this is a further sign that the opening is too small. he said they will both likely have to be circ'd. but if they are having no trouble right now, its not a panic situation, jsut something to know that will be likely down the road.

i came home in a panic, but am relieved to read the 'ballooning' is normal and a sign that things are happening as they should. i was also relieved to read that foreskin would not necessarily be FULLY retractable until age 18, so WHEW we have a long way to go. i realize that many docs don't really know how this works, so i'm not angry at him, just relieved that I was right and the boys are a-ok.

Your boys are PERFECTLY normal! My son balloons and has for almost a year. This is totally normal. Read my thread posted here. Also, never let a doctor manipulate their foreskins again. This is inappropriate and risky as it can cause microtears. The only person to retract a foreskin is the boy himself. You might think to print some of the links in my thread and give them to that doctor. He needs to become educated on the normal development of the intact boy.

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...893&highlight=

To the OP. CONGRATULATIONS!!!! :::: The thread I have posted will give you all the info you should need.

[kriket]

Originally Posted by Fyrestorm

Think of it this way..if it were a girl and the doctor had inserted his finger in her vagina to see how tight it was, you would have been outraged! I would have had him arrested!

ITA.

I would be outraged and have picked up my child and left (probably shaking, I'm kinda a puss)

congrats on the baby! I love little boys, they are so sweet!

[calngavinsmom]

Originally Posted by donnar

most un-circ'd boys need to be later on, and of course he gave me the whole std and infections story as well. he even had the nerve to tell me that "15yrs ago, no one was circumsizing their boys, and now they are returning to circumcision" (you know, the all-knowing and powerful "they"). .

I just wanted to address these two points in your post. He is dead wrong about "most" boys needing to be circed later in life. In fact, CPS states that 10% of boys left intact will need a circ later and 10% of boys circed will have to be REcirced later. And since most intact boys who are circed later are due to quacks like this doc, that number should be much lower, which to me means that circing increases your sons chances of needing to be circed later.
http://www.caringforkids.cps.ca/preg...rcumcision.htm

And as for the numbers going up for circ in Canada, wrong again. Canadas circ rate is down to less than 10% now. Much lower than 15 years ago.
http://www.courtchallenge.com/refs/s...hi-2005-e.html

My doc has never touched my sons penis' ever, even as infants. Why? because I never voiced any concerns about them. The only time she even mentioned their circ status was when my first was born and she told me most of her patients were not circumcising their boys.

Good luck with that doc. It seems like at the very least you need to set some guidelines for care with him(keeping his hands off the boys penis')

Take care,

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

If you must keep this Dr. you should print out the Intact Care Agreement http://www.mothersagainstcirc.org/care.htm have him sign it and put in your ds's file.

Also institute a no touching genitals at all rule with him since odds are if he is this ignorant of proper intact care he will probably just blow off anything you say but who knows he may actually listen. Here is the AAP Intact Care Guide to show him as well.

[Fyrestorm]

Originally Posted by calngavinsmom

I just wanted to address these two points in your post. He is dead wrong about "most" boys needing to be circed later in life. In fact, CPS states that 10% of boys left intact will need a circ later and 10% of boys circed will have to be REcirced later. And since most intact boys who are circed later are due to quacks like this doc, that number should be much lower, which to me means that circing increases your sons chances of needing to be circed later.
http://www.caringforkids.cps.ca/preg...rcumcision.htm

In intact countries (Europe, Finland etc) the need to be cut later percentage is hovering around 1%. I would guess it's because most docs over there have a clue and leave little boys alone, thus causing many fewer 'medically caused' circs!