Ok, how about "We don't bang on the laptop when mama gets up to pee"?
"We don't _____" Rules you never realized you had until you had a toddler. - Page 17
never thought I'd have to make a "we wear underwear while using scissors" rule
"we don't ride the cat like a horse"
"we don't put bobby pins in our penis"
"we don't barf into peoples hands when we don't like our food"
"we don't eat coconut foot cream"
"we don't put unwanted food/toys between mom's boobs"
"we don't give people our boogers"
"we don't try to look at our yoni when we pee, pee goes everywhere"
dd arches her pelvis to watch herself pee and then the pee arcs over the toilet seat. our bathroom always smells so fresh.
Oh dear me. My DD does half the things you mention here. The barfing thing is the WORST. I was crying and I was laughing so hard. I mean really? Spitting out food is so damn gross and it's DDs newest activity.
"we don't draw marker on the cat"
"I know it's washable but we still don't!"
"we don't eat jellybeans out of the flower beds"
"we don't touch mamas pimples because it hurts"
(yes, I get huge ones after ovulation, I'm so lucky!!!)
Really tho! Toddlers are strange creatures! Love em!