4 Year Old Screaming Tantrums

[madskye]

New thing--now when DD throws a tantrum she just stands in the middle of the room and SCREAMS.

It's like she discovered the wonder of her lungs.

I don't know how to handle it--I usually spend a few fruitless minutes trying to reason with her and then I just walk away. Anyone have any advice on handling it? She is really loud, and it really puts me on edge.

Tantrums are usually over the usual stuff--not wanting to leave when it's time to go, not wanting to wear something or wanting to wear something that's not available (dirty clothes), basically having to tell her no, which I really try not to do too often.

[jewelsJZ]

:

[bl987ue]

Put her in her room and ignore it. Just don't give in, whatever you do.

[MommyKelly]

We played "lets make a deal" with 4 yo dd for the past year or so. I finally told her very calmly and matter of fact if you are going to scream like that, go do it in your bedroom, and I will not talk to you until you are done.

I had to "prove myself" quite a few times, but once she learned that I really wasnt going to get sucked into it, she has stopped.

Good luck Mama!

[Viola]

I've done different things. Now that mine is a little older, I will tell her that she can't scream like that in the same room and to go to another room. Sometimes she just screams and runs off on her own. When she was younger, I'd follow her, because she had this habit of breaking or ripping things up in the room where she went, and also she would pee on the floor. But now she honestly will just go in her bed or on the couch in the other room, cover up, suck her thumb and fall asleep.

When I felt like she was really angry and destructive, I'd hold her in my lap in a "time out" for both of us, and rock her and say soothing things to her. Sometimes it worked, sometimes she'd struggle and fight her way out of my embrace, so I'd let her go, and she'd just cry on the floor and then eventually calm down and start giggling about something and be done.

A few times I tried to comfort her, and she'd just sit on the floor and cry and exhibit anger at my attempts, so I'd just go about my business. Then I'd hear her crying change and one time she was saying, "I need help!" and another time she said, "I really wanted to do that." And both times I was able to respond to her specific issues and acknowledge that it was sad that she couldn't do that, or whatever, and then she'd be fine.

[Susan Kunkel]

Sometimes hold them some times give them space. Just make sure all are safe. Thankfully they do not last forever.
Susan

[madskye]

Thanks for all the responses. I am going to try to talk to her today, too, and find out what is going through her head when she's screaming like that. I think it is just "I want!!!!!!!!" but maybe she sees it differently.

[D_McG]

"I will not listen to you scream. Come back when you're done". And then I walk him down to his room.