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Pregnant after Infertility Tribe - Page 8

post #141 of 449
Can I just mention that this thread makes me sooooo happy. I think it's because so many of us have been through so much with infertility and to have all of us coming together in one place again and under happy circumstances....is just a really happy feeling. Maybe these are the pregnancy hormones speaking???
post #142 of 449
Hello ladies,
I was a bit of a lurker during our ivf attempts, but I'm thankfully now able to join in on the pregnancy discussions and am glad to see this group for those of us who are dealing with an extra layer of concerns/hopes attached to our pregnancies. Congratulations to you all!!!!
just thought I'd say hello. THis was our second ivf/icsi attempt. was pregnant the first time but miscarried by week 6. I'm past the 6th week mark this time and feeling like this pregnancy will happen. I still get a bit nervous when the pregnancy symptoms aren't too strong yet, wondering if the pregnancy has ended. Seems this is pretty normal though - the nervousness. I can't wait for the 8 week u/s to ease my mind.
post #143 of 449
Quote:
Originally Posted by gumby74 View Post
Can I just mention that this thread makes me sooooo happy. I think it's because so many of us have been through so much with infertility and to have all of us coming together in one place again and under happy circumstances....is just a really happy feeling. Maybe these are the pregnancy hormones speaking???
I feel the same way It's a shame we all live so far apart because I could defintely see us all at a coffee shop meeting up for some decaf and cocoa
post #144 of 449
I am so excited to have found this tribe!!! We just finished our first IVF fresh cycle and got a BFP yesterday. I am still in shock and of course trying to remain cautious in my optimism because it is still very early, but after 2.5 years ttc#2 I am just so excited

I am going to go back now and read through more of this thread, but already I recognize some names from my days on the nursingmamasttc threads and around the IF board. So exciting to see so many familiar names over here in this thread!

The short version of our story:
- started ttc #2 march 2007. Everyone told me to wean, I didn't listen. Glad I didn't since when DS did wean at 4 it did not help the IF at all.
- did all the tests a year later, all inconclusive - dx with "unexplained"
- did 3 rounds clomid, 2 IUI's and a ton of alternative therapies
- started IVF in August 09, had a bit of a rocky cycle (bumped to 450IU gonal-f, slow developing embies, not sure there would be any to transfer, etc) but ended up with 2 perfect embies to transfer at day 3, 3 embies (6 and 7 cell) and 1 blast to freeze.
post #145 of 449
Snowbabies:
This has been weighing on my mind a little lately...the other day I read an article on CNN during lunch about the topic and haven't really been able to shake it. We have way more snowbabies in waiting than we could ever possibly use, unless we decided to give the Duggers a run for their money. I am not sure about having other bio children out there, but I am also not sure about "destroying" them (our clinic doesn't support research to my knowledge). Since we want to have 1 or 2 more children, I guess I have a while to think about it...and continue paying the storage fees.
post #146 of 449
Belly, I'm related to the Duggars. I'm not thrilled.

I was fertile once, and then rendered infertile after being hit by a car. I was 19. My fiance and I went through IVF last year, one of the youngest couples the Stanford clinic has had. I was 27 and he was 25. The first cycle took, and then we lost them. Two days before Christmas. I wanted to jump immediately into another cycle, though we had some frozen. My gut said another fresh cycle. That cycle was a big fat fail. The third time around my gut said a frozen transfer would work. We went with a natural cycle transfer, which is really new still. No drugs until the HCG shot, just lots of close monitoring.

It worked!

We started off with twins, then lost one. In another 52 days, our little girl will be considered term (though 37 weeks is still early).

I've been blessed to have my fiance. He's been so supportive in every way, from doing all the shots for me since I couldn't, to completely pampering me at every moment. He still does! If I want something, he goes to get it, no problem. He's understanding about my energy being low. He takes the vacuum from me if I'm vacuuming when he gets home from work! I appreciate everything he does so much, and always do my best to show him. He's an amazing daddy already!!
post #147 of 449
I love this thread, too! Sure wish we could all meet IRL! I find that it's hard to find a good tribe or ddc to get together with, since I'm not in the medical mainstream about most things but did IVF to conceive. Has anyone else felt that way? That's why it's nice to have this thread (along with all the other things that go with being pregnant after IF, such as all the years we spent ttc compared with most people).
When I think of all the years we were ttc and not conceiving, and how if we'd conceived right away we'd have a 13 year old, it makes me a bit sad.
post #148 of 449
I understand how you feel. It's hard not to snap at people who say things like, "I can't believe it finally happened! We didn't think it would take so long. It's been three months!" I think, on some level, those people are braggarts, but to call them out on it gets you chastised.

Know what else annoys me, along the same topic? People who say, "It's been 4/5/6 months and I'm not pregnant yet. I need to see a docto because I think I'm infertile. Where do I start?" No. NO. This is WELL within the range of normal, on the low time to conceive end, in fact!! I was banned from another community, yes, banned, for telling a girl who was bitching at just 4 months of trying about how her insurance wouldn't cover a fertility doctor or IVF (she actually wanted IVF at 4 months) until it had been at least a year, that the a full year is normal to conceive, and no insurance will cover IVF just because someone wants it, and if hers will cover it at a year, then she is very lucky because most people have NO coverage for infertility. I wanted to say more, but held back. Anyway, I was banned for nt being "supportive" and was called "jealous" (of what? my insurance covered the IVF we were going through, and as I had a prior diagnosed reason for infertility, bilateral blockage, we didn't have to wait a year, so I'm the one in the enviable position).

People who complain that they're infertile with no cause to think so other than not getting pregnant in a few months are really like a slap in the face to people who have a diagnosed reason or who have taken a year or more and still haven't conceived.
post #149 of 449
Thread Starter 
Hey Sri Rahda!! I can't believe how far along you are already - congrats!! How are you feeling?

Quote:
Originally Posted by gumby74 View Post
Can I just mention that this thread makes me sooooo happy. I think it's because so many of us have been through so much with infertility and to have all of us coming together in one place again and under happy circumstances....is just a really happy feeling. Maybe these are the pregnancy hormones speaking???
Me, too!

Quote:
Originally Posted by fullofhope08 View Post
Hello ladies,
I can't wait for the 8 week u/s to ease my mind.
Welcome!! Yes, the u/s is very reassuring!!! My symtoms have been coming and going, so try not to worry. (Although my dh told me this morning I am getting a "pregnant ass", I guess my butt changed when I was pg with dd and he sees it going the same way. He doesn't seem to care, so I won't)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pookietooth View Post
I find that it's hard to find a good tribe or ddc to get together with, since I'm not in the medical mainstream about most things but did IVF to conceive. Has anyone else felt that way?
Yes, I know what you mean. I would have said I was way too crunchy to do IVF, until I was told it was our only chance. I had my first prenatal appointment and they asked some follow up questions about dd, including if I'd breadfed. They were blown away by how long we'd gone, it just is normal to me, as are many things that are "normal" here on MDC.


I hear you Noelle! I don't talk about our IF in real life, so the people who have complained about not being pregnant yet after three whole months don't know how much it hurts me. I also kind of have to laugh to myself - if you only knew! Also in the people don't get it category, in my DDC there was a discussion about what BC people would use after this pregnancy and when I explained why NONE is my answer, several people mentioned the ol' once you've done IVF/adopted whatever, then you might get pregnant on your own thing. Uh, no I don't think so.

Love and light to everyone for the coming week.
post #150 of 449
Quote:
Originally Posted by crazyrunningmama View Post
Also in the people don't get it category, in my DDC there was a discussion about what BC people would use after this pregnancy and when I explained why NONE is my answer, several people mentioned the ol' once you've done IVF/adopted whatever, then you might get pregnant on your own thing. Uh, no I don't think so.
Some of us can hope, but it's not likely. We are in the hope category. Still got some snowbabies, but we'll let them go to someone else. We would like another one or two, but if a brother or sister happens, it will be natural. If it happens, it does, and if not, then we still have our one, will be thrilled, and hopefully our snowbabies can help someone else experience the joy.

So far no one has said this to me in person though. Aside from the grandmother who was glad I miscarried the first set of twins last year (evil bitch), and the close friend who ditched me because I wouldn't go out getting drunk anymore, everyone in person has been just so amazing and supportive. It's on the internet that I'm finding the stupid people. But it's also on the internet I've found some of the best people of my life, including my fiance.

all around!
post #151 of 449
Thread Starter 
Noelle. The reason there is no hope for us is because we have severe MFI, we required ICSI to get pregnant. If it was on both sides or if I had PCOS or something, I would hope too.
post #152 of 449
Just a big congrats to all you ladies! I did 4 years of infertility treatments before conceiving DD.

I'm so happy for all of you ladies! Relish your buddha bellies.

V
post #153 of 449
Hi ladies! I thought I'd give this thread a little bump. How's everyone doing? We've had a couple of tense days, but things turned out ok. I just got home from an ultrasound to check my amniotic fluid levels. There were some concerns about low levels, but everything looked perfect! We even got to see our little bean happily sucking on her thumb. It was so nice and reassuring. I can't believe that we get to meet her in person in a few weeks. It feels like we've been waiting for her for so long.
post #154 of 449
sorry
post #155 of 449
Hi ladies,

Congrats to all on success after the heartbreak of IF. I have quite an astonishing story that I will be brief in describing. We are MF after cancer tx, and had IVF/ICSI to have DD, almost 3yo. now. After several frustrating and negative FETs earlier this year, I insisted on a semen analysis to just see where we were. It had been several years since his last SA and I felt like they were just assuming the worst while not gathering any more data. The SA was much, much higher than before (like, millions, vs. two dozen sperm), to our shock, but motility was 2%. So we got approved for IUI. We started but got canceled due to Clomid disaster.

Then this month, I got pregnant. On our own. Just like that. I'm also still nursing DD. We can't believe it. I'm trying not to wait for the other shoe to drop, yk? We've had a loss before so I'm just cautiously optimistic.

Just wanted to share. After dealing w/IF for six years, I am still reeling from this!
post #156 of 449
Oh Mama2Bean, WHAT a wondrous story!
Heartfelt congrats to you. I hope you have a very healthy and happy 9 mths!
post #157 of 449
Congratulations, Mama2Bean. Great story!

CRM - we're in that boat too. It's a physical impossibility for us to get pg naturally. We still have people say "oh, sometimes miracles happen" but unless I want to explain to them about CBAVD, all I can do is smile and nod. Even our pediatrician said "miracles happen" - after I told her about DH's condition. Some people are a little oblivious... or at least believe in true miracles LOL.

Poet - when's the u/s? You must be on pins and needles!
post #158 of 449
Something the PP said reminded me of the visit I had with the new pediatrician yesterday. He appears like a great guy and right away I knew I liked him when he told me he would never force a vaccination on my child. However, I found myself getting the same uneasy feeling when he said "so, you are expecting your second child. Just wait until you have your third and you have to try and juggle all three." I wanted so badly to say....some people can't assume another child will ever be on the way. I only wish it was as easy as dtd and then bang! i'm pg!
post #159 of 449
I think my mind is still trying to wrap my brain around this. I was at the grocery store today and saw a few pregnant bellies, and I kept catching myself in a knnejerk reaction staring longingly at them and feeling sad, and then I was like NO, this is YOU! I think I have about 3 yrs worth of emotional releasing to do. There is a PTSD element to being post-IVF, even if the desire was positive. It's so much to go through and you are just hoping with all your might everything will be okay. It's a bit of a weather system..two days ago I felt very confident and pregnant, yesterday I was a little worried. I kept smelling the coffee to make sure it still smelled bad to me! Today I'm just trying not to focus on it so much. I'm pretty sure these emotions have no bearing on reality though. Just hopeful, vulnerable...is this similar to how you all felt right at the beginning?

Our u/s is next Thursday. I will be 6 wk, 3 days and I'm not sure if I should definitely be able to see a HB or if it's more like 50/50. Anyone know? I know seeing one will make a big difference.

Libbylou, I'm glad things are looking good!

Gumby, on a good doctor you are comfortable with, but yeah, I hear you...most are not attuned to fertility struggles.

How's everyone else?
post #160 of 449
Thread Starter 
Hey poet. You always put things so darn eloquently. I know what you mean, we've been TTC #2 for so long and now it's hard to settle into being joyful about it. Partly because our kids will be 4 years apart, which was not the plan, and all the regrets about what could have been done differently, still grief about having to do IVF at all, paying it off still, etc etc. I was very fearful throughout my pregnancy with dd, and I am making a conscious decision to be more joyful about this one (between feeling barfy). But still, I held my breath for the second beta, then the hb u/s, now for the end of the first trimester. At no point does God or Gaia shout down from the heavens "you can relax, it's all going to go great!" We are never given permission to relax and enjoy it, we have to give that permission to ourselves, which is hard for me. But I am doing better with it this time around. And really enjoying moving the ticker in my siggy along every week.

Glad things are okay LibbyLou
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