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Pregnant after Infertility Tribe - Page 21

post #401 of 449
Originally Posted by poetgirl View Post
Don't some of you feel like it's nice to still have a right to process your pregnancy w/out the constant lens of IF?
Absolutely. I think it's totally wrong for us to feel like we need to edit ourselves because of what we've been through, and I won't do it. I think I did moreso with my first, but it took us 21 months to conceive her and it was only 6 this time (though we did have the m/c to complicate things this time). No one has ever told me that I should be grateful and not complain, but I used to tell it to myself all the time. But no more. I've said it before and I'll say it again. IF takes away too much already. It shouldn't take from us the right to be regular pregnant women, pains and complaints and all! over.

As for your "complaint" though I don't think it's really a complaint so much as a puzzled observation, I'm gaining much faster this pregnancy than I did with my first. I'm only at 14 weeks, but I think I've gained around 8 pounds. I didn't gain this much until around 20 weeks with my first -- gained a total of 30. I probably am eating more than I did the first time, but it's because I NEED to. Different babies demand different things and do different things to our metabolisms. If you were a tad underweight (or on the border) to begin with, your body might be trying to catch up to the demands of building a baby. I know you're not particularly worried, but I'd be questioning, too.
BTW -- I remember my weight gain really speeding up in the middle and slowing way down toward the end, so you may find that will happen to you.
post #402 of 449
Originally Posted by Julia'sMom View Post
Perdita - Where are you?

I'm so glad to see everyone's pregnancy progressing smoothly. I too had the feeling that I couldn't complain, after all, the pregnancy was what I wanted and tried for so long to acheive. In fact, I still feel that pressure. As much as I love my kiddos, there have been many times when I've cursed the if that resulted in twins. It would have been so much easier one at a time like a normal fertile woman. However, this really isn't something I feel I can tell anyone, because who would understand?

AFM, the twins are doing well. They're getting older and more alert and we've acheived the first smiles. Unfortunately, they still aren't getting heavier. Benjamin is still 8 lb even and Sarah is just 7lb at almost 8 weeks old. THey're both nursing, hallelujah, and we're keeping up supplemental bottles in hopes that they'll gain weight. Sleeping is falling in a routine, so I have nothing to complain about there. I can't wait to see all the other beautiful babies coming soon. :Joy: :Joy:
Congrats on gaining sleeping routines! Hopefully those kiddos will chunk up a bit for you soon too
post #403 of 449
Thread Starter 
I like your style, AmyKT!!

Poet, how are you feeling about the weight gain? It's hard not to worry. I was heavy to start with and pleased that I was not gaining a pound a week, but then lately the weight gain sped up for a bit and has now plateau'd. Odd, but I am assuming my body and CRM Jr. know what they are doing. Glad you are loving your class, that does sound nice to do it early. That way you'll have lots of time to do extra research on suggestions you get and really think about things.

Juliasmom. Glad the twins are sleeping more, here's hoping they gain gain gain!!!

Perdita, where are you????

How are you feeling Jelinifer?

Who is exercising while you are pregnant and how is it working for you? I swore I would more this time and now I have SPD and it huuuuuurts. Working on that first. Kegels count as exercise, I should just do more of those.
post #404 of 449
Amy, I appreciate your response because I was kind of worried about the gain but didn't feel comfortable really admitting that. Thank you.

CRM, It's more comforting when the weight adds on pound by pound more predictably but it's more realistic to experience the jumps and plateaus.

I am feeling better about it overall. It's slowed down some and I talked with my sister and mom and they both said they we have bodies that have really high metabolisms regularly but that we overcompensate when pregnant and it slows way down to make sure we gain. It happened to both of them. So, I am going to chalk it up to the intelligence of my body. This month, DH and I have been doing 25 min. cardio at the gym most days and it's helping a lot of things.

CRM, You asked about exercise. I have been doing a lot of pre-natal yoga and I have no aches or pains yet, so I recommend that. My birth class asks us to do this daily: 150 kegels, 80 pelvic tilts, squatting, tailor sitting and something aerobic. I don't always get there but being held accountable does make a huge difference, and I feel really good. I am trying to just fit the kegels in random times, waiting for the tea to boil, stop sign, when I get in bed, etc.

How's everyone else?
post #405 of 449
I'm exercising way less than I did w my first. I usually walk but the weather is yuck, and anyway, it's hard to find time with work and a toddler. I should def be doing kegels, but they make me nauseated. Maybe I'm doing them wrong.
post #406 of 449
If kegels count as exercise, I'm the fittest one of all! Otherwise, I go to a bunch of prenatal yoga classes each week. Only one is a real workout and the rest are really gentle/relaxing classes with alot of practice with meditating and vocalizing to prep for labor.

Question for you gals who have older kiddos from being pregnant after IF... My Bradley teacher and I got into a bit of an argument last class. She was saying that EDDs are bunk and first moms especially can expect to go at least a week past their EDD. I can understand that it may be true for moms who may be a few days off on when they believe they conceived, but for us who are exactly sure of the day we conceived... how close to the EDD you caculated did your baby come? I tried to argue this point with our teacher, but she couldn't wrap her head around the idea of people knowing their conception date down to the hour in some cases with IF treatment
post #407 of 449
Thread Starter 
I think the inaccuracy about EDD's is more connected to individual variation. Kids all walk, talk, lift their heads etc at different ages, why wouldn't they need different lengths of time to gestate? It is true though that your average person (including nurses, doctors and midwives) just can't "get it" that we know exactly when we got pregnant (phrases like "3 day transfer of two 8 celled embryos" don't come out of the mouths of their other patients ). I have had some odd conversations with health professionals along these lines, too. I just kind of gave up, which is why I ended up being told two different due dates and now I can't remember which one ended up being 5 days before I gave birth (and why the hell is 5 days "overdue"? It's well within the range of normal, I hate the terminology). With this pregnancy I made sure to get an adjusted date for my last period that matches the EDD that the fertility clinic gave me and that's the info I give, instead of telling the real date of my last period and arguing with them while they look blank and stunned.

Part of why first time moms tend to be "overdue" - whatever that really means - is because our bodies take some time to get ready for labour. (Braxton Hicks is not "false labour" it's practice labour).

Wow, you guys are doing great with the exercise!! I can't do any squatting until my SPD issue clears up (which may be postpartum!) so most yoga is out.

Poet, it's really tough to know what's right for your body, I'm glad to hear you've made peace with the weight gain.

Remember that our pelvic floor mucles have both fast and slow twitch fibers like every other muscle, so we should all be doing squeeze and hoooooooold Kegels AND flex, flex, flex Kegels.
post #408 of 449
Hey everyone - sorry I've been such a stranger!

I'm 39.5 weeks. Pregnant and cranky. I've had contractions for the past two days but not productive. I think I'd be more philosophical if I didn't have the contractions - I could just sit quietly and wait, but this is driving me nuts - I don't want to really leave the house - every time I think things have quieted down, they start up again...

So I'm trying to strike a balance between staying active to try to move things along, and getting enough rest because, well, one way or another, the end point is inevitable! LOL!

Hope everyone's doing okay... thanks CRM for reminding me to drop by!
post #409 of 449
re: EDD.

I had an IUI for both pregnancies, and with DD I was 5 days over my EDD as calculated by conception date. But, if I had gone with the EDD calculated by my first ultrasound, I would have only been 2 days over. That discrepancy on the u/s was, I know, not due to conception date error, but as CRM said, just a product of my DDs individual growth rate.

This time, I adjusted my EDD 1 day based on that early ultrasound, so we'll see how close the birth date falls.

Perdita -- we've not "met," but I'm wishing you sanity and the best baby birthing
post #410 of 449
I had an IUI with ds, and he was born the day after his EDD, which was calculated based on when the HCG shot was given. With dd, we conceived with IVF, and her EDD was based on the day of retreival, and she was born 5 days after that. My acupunturist told me that stress can make you go longer, because the receptors that should be receiving the signal from the baby to go into labor are blocked, which is why acupuncture can help, since it relaxes you. In my case, I started labor (or prelabor) as the day I was scheduled for an acupuncture appointment.
post #411 of 449
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by Perdita_in_Ontario View Post

Hope everyone's doing okay... thanks CRM for reminding me to drop by!
What's a little stalking between friends, right? I am sorry you are feeling cranky and I don't blame you a bit. This second pregnancy thing is not so easy, can't put your feet up when someone jumps on you every time you sit down. Here's hoping your wee one is more accomodating than mine. Thanks for the update and I hope you 1. get some good rest and then 2. get some productive contractions so you can get the show on the road. Take good care and let us know about your birth. Excited for you being so close!!!
post #412 of 449
Good luck Perdita!! I'm so excited that you're almost there. CRM & Poet, you're time will be soon, but hopefully not too soon.

We're surviving and I think I'm falling in love more and more each day. I am blessed. :
post #413 of 449
Thread Starter 
How's everyone doing?


Glad you are focussing on the love Juliasmom (and I hope you are getting some more sleep).

post #414 of 449
Doing pretty good here I started seeing a Chiro recently who specializes in the Webster Technique and my back hasn't felt this good since before I got pg

How about you CRM?
post #415 of 449
It looks like it's time to do some stalking. Perdita, you're signature is updated, but I don't see anythign posted here.
post #416 of 449
Thread Starter 
Well, I'm not above a little stalking..


I am doing okay, reeeeaaaaallllly looking forward to being off of work and grateful each day that baby moves a lot ("good baby, reassure mama"). Not exercising enough due to the SPD and yowza downward pressure on the ol' pelvic floor muscles. And my weight is a bit alarming.

How is everyone else?????
post #417 of 449
I'm good but pretty huge! I don't get the "you're so small/you're so big" comments from different people... just disbelief from everyone that I'm not due till May I went to a baby shower on Sunday and was quite a bit bigger at 29w3d than the mom of honor who was going on 36w.

At the same shower I met up with a mutual friend of the mom of honor who is starting to research IF treatments.... just got her first Clomid script/HSG/SA done, so naturally we had alot to talk about in common. We were sitting around all of the dad-to-be's older aunties and I didn't realize that the details I was getting into was making them (and even some of the younger women around us) pretty uncomfortable. Has anyone else "lost their filter" when it comes to talking about IF in public? I found that I've discussed our situation so many times with so many people that I really have no shame in discussing the nitty gritty to anyone despite their comfort levels
post #418 of 449
Jen, just wanted to warn you to push only a bit as SPD pain can signal a weak pelviv floor. I had it too and pushed a lot, and now have problems with my bladder.
post #419 of 449
I was thinking of everyone on this board and came to check and see how everyone is doing,but it looks like no one has posted in awhile. How is everyone???? Pleeezzzzz come back!
post #420 of 449
Thread Starter 
Here I am!!! I am in the "any day now" stage, can hardly believe it! It's funny what a relief it is to know that never have to obsess about getting pregnant again. We are not fully prepared for this baby, I think I am procrastinating partly because I want being pregnant to last and last, knowing this is my last one. Silly?

How is everyone doing????
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