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Why do store employees DO THIS!!!!!! - Page 9

post #161 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnmama View Post
Well, that stinks. I know people complain about the quality of school lunches in the US, but free/reduced school lunches for families who need them are a wonderful thing, imo.
From discussions with dh, I think it's probably because of the different school sizes. DS1's elementary school had about 180 students, I believe. That's pretty standard. I'm guessing school lunches involve a kitchen, or at least extra space for distribution? (I don't really know, because I don't know what's in them!) Putting extra facilities of that kind into every school would be very expensive, when the schools are so small. I know dh's schools were much bigger, and I get the feeling that's common in the US (or at least some areas).
post #162 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnmama View Post
Well, that stinks. I know people complain about the quality of school lunches in the US, but free/reduced school lunches for families who need them are a wonderful thing, imo.
Without them here many kids would go hungry. I had never even heard of a school not actually serving breakfast and lunch until the other night when I was chatting online and the topic came up. My mind just cant grasp the concept honestly. Even back when my mom was in school lunch was provided to kids in the cafeteria.

School sizes here are around 400-500 give or take and high school has 5 different schools that feed into it. So a thousand+ kids there. Maybe it has to do with school size along with the avg. household income.

The food served here for breakfast and lunch is actually very good quality healthy food. In most cases better than what I could do
post #163 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by MCatLvrMom2A&X View Post
A woman at church was very upset that she couldnt send pb to school with her kids because the kid would get in trouble. It didnt seem to matter to her that there was a child in the school who was severly allergic to the point of entering a room where pb had been in the last 24 hours would send him into anaphalaxis

She just couldnt grasp the concept.
*sigh*
I think people figure it's some little thing that the media has blown out of proportion or something.
post #164 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by MCatLvrMom2A&X View Post
Without them here many kids would go hungry. I had never even heard of a school not actually serving breakfast and lunch until the other night when I was chatting online and the topic came up. My mind just cant grasp the concept honestly. Even back when my mom was in school lunch was provided to kids in the cafeteria.
Our elementary schools don't have any cafeterias. Kids just eat at their desks or outside.

hmm....we've gone way OT now. I should probably get back to some real life stuff.
post #165 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by MCatLvrMom2A&X View Post
Without them here many kids would go hungry. I had never even heard of a school not actually serving breakfast and lunch until the other night when I was chatting online and the topic came up. My mind just cant grasp the concept honestly. Even back when my mom was in school lunch was provided to kids in the cafeteria.

School sizes here are around 400-500 give or take and high school has 5 different schools that feed into it. So a thousand+ kids there. Maybe it has to do with school size along with the avg. household income.

The food served here for breakfast and lunch is actually very good quality healthy food. In most cases better than what I could do
schools in the town i live in don't even HAVE cafeterias. sometimes when i was in grade school, they had pizza days or hot dog days and kids could buy that stuff but mostly, you brought your own.
thank goodness, ds1 only really likes cheese sandwiches, b/c his father existed on pb (still does) and there are kids with peanut allergies at (what will soon be) ds's school.
i think we should just respect the no peanut butter rule, not only to keep children safe, but to save the teachers the trouble of constantly checking to see who has what and seperate the kids with pb.
post #166 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by Storm Bride View Post
Okay. I was broke. I could give ds1 at least a month of peanut butter for about $6.00-$6.50 at that time, and I paid $0.89 for a loaf of bread that would last him at least a week. I have no idea what size carton of yogurt you're talking about, but it was $2.50 for a carton that he could go through in 3-4 days, if he were taking it for lunch.
I didn't mean for you to give him yogurt and nothing else for lunch.
Lunch doesn't have to be a sandwich. A small serving of yogurt, with fruit and bread is perfectly nutritious and filling. Actually, that goes for cheese, too. I can't imagine a young child going through a 32 oz. carton of yogurt in 3days if the yogurt is appropriately teamed up with other foods.

I know peanut butter is the cheapest. I'm just saying that the other things do not cost as much as deli meat or a sirloin steak.

I'll be honest and say that I've never been in your shoes. My youngest doesn't like peanut butter, so I've never counted on it for meals. We homeschool, so I've never had to worry about PB free zones. I've been broke, but never so broke that I couldn't afford food. So my perception of things are obviously going to be different than yours.

Since you couldn't do peanut butter and have rejected what I think are inexpensive, viable options, I wonder how you "worked around" the PB ban? What did your son end up eating?
post #167 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by NellieKatz View Post
But if anyone tries to offer my child something directly without going through me, that REALLY ticks me off, because that's just rude. And of course the average kid will probably take it (though my 6-yr old HAS been known to say things like "no, I can't have hard candy" or "that's really bad for my teeth!" or "does THAT have High Fructose Corn Syrup in it?") :-)
Quote:
Originally Posted by NellieKatz View Post
It's tricky. Moms who care what goes into their kids have a nearly impossible job in this culture. However, a little respect goes a long way when dealing with other peoples' children.
See, here's the thing - some other parents will get ticked off because they think it's rude not to talk directly to the child - they think that is disrespectful to the child. So pity the poor store clerk, who, not being psychic is unable to tell which type she is dealing with.
post #168 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by choli View Post
See, here's the thing - some other parents will get ticked off because they think it's rude not to talk directly to the child - they think that is disrespectful to the child. So pity the poor store clerk, who, not being psychic is unable to tell which type she is dealing with.
I've only heard that point of view on MDC and not even very frequently. I don't think any other parents I know IRL feel that way. IMO, the store clerk would be wise go with the approach that would annoy the least amount of people, which based on this thread and on my experience in real life, would be to ask the parent, discretely if possible, before offering food to a little kid. I think like one person here said that would tick them off, so odds are it will go over well.
post #169 of 187
this appears to have gone OT - but I wanted to throw in my 2 cents about the original scenario:

My kids only get candy at Easter and Halloween or at grandma's maybe. I **NEVER** accept candy for them from any source. (my DH occasionally does, but that's reserved for Daddy) They don't throw tantrums about it because they don't expect the candy.

It's not the HCFS or the colored dyes. It's that I don't think it's necessary or appropriate. I politely say no-thank-you and defray the situation by interfering with the gesture so my child doesn't see the offer or realize what's going on. I've had people offer it directly to my child, but normally they ask me first. My oldest knows better and will say no thank you without question. My middle child *wants* the candy, and she will beg for it. But she's never had a melt-down. If I sense that the situation is going to turn ugly, we find a distraction. I'll find an acceptable snack to buy or stickers or something fun to do.

I just don't see why I have to compromise and accept something that I don't want for my children - in order not to "offend" the person giving it??

and as for rearranging the shelves: my kids always do that. they pick up merchandise that OTHER customers left on the wrong shelf or on the floor and put it in the right place. I would be mortified if they made more work for the store employees.

--janis
post #170 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2xy View Post
I didn't mean for you to give him yogurt and nothing else for lunch.
Lunch doesn't have to be a sandwich. A small serving of yogurt, with fruit and bread is perfectly nutritious and filling. Actually, that goes for cheese, too. I can't imagine a young child going through a 32 oz. carton of yogurt in 3days if the yogurt is appropriately teamed up with other foods.
I think 32oz. is...4 cups? So, that would be 1000ml. I've never seen on that big. The "big" carton was 750ml. back then and is now 650ml. That's the cheap stuff, loaded with sugar. He could definitely go through one in 3 days in kindergarten. I frequently gave him a PB&J, with yogurt, and fruit. So, this would be the same lunch, less the peanut butter and the jam (not much jam). I know lunch doesn't have to be a sandwich, but that was what worked best for ds1.

Quote:
I know peanut butter is the cheapest. I'm just saying that the other things do not cost as much as deli meat or a sirloin steak.
I never said they did.

Quote:
I'll be honest and say that I've never been in your shoes. My youngest doesn't like peanut butter, so I've never counted on it for meals. We homeschool, so I've never had to worry about PB free zones. I've been broke, but never so broke that I couldn't afford food. So my perception of things are obviously going to be different than yours.

Since you couldn't do peanut butter and have rejected what I think are inexpensive, viable options, I wonder how you "worked around" the PB ban? What did your son end up eating?
I sent him with egg salad and sometimes cheese and such. When I say I "worked around", I mean I almost lost my phone, and went without sometimes myself and things like that. I could come up with the extra money (and it did add up to a bit over the course of a month), but it had to come from somewhere...and it tended to snowball, because then I'd owe late payment fees and such.

This isn't even relevant to me, anymore. I spend way too much on food these days. I just remember what it was like back then.
post #171 of 187
this irritates me too. Ds has food sensitivies to certain dyes especially red and it drives me CRAZY that I have to give a long-winded explanation of how eating stuff with red 40 can cause him to have hour-long head banging episodes before they stop offering. Can't a simple "sorry, he's not allowed to have that" do? and really, who gives food to a little kid without asking the parent first? For all they know he could be diabetic.
post #172 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2xy View Post
I didn't mean for you to give him yogurt and nothing else for lunch.
Lunch doesn't have to be a sandwich. A small serving of yogurt, with fruit and bread is perfectly nutritious and filling. Actually, that goes for cheese, too. I can't imagine a young child going through a 32 oz. carton of yogurt in 3days if the yogurt is appropriately teamed up with other foods.

I know peanut butter is the cheapest. I'm just saying that the other things do not cost as much as deli meat or a sirloin steak.

I'll be honest and say that I've never been in your shoes. My youngest doesn't like peanut butter, so I've never counted on it for meals. We homeschool, so I've never had to worry about PB free zones. I've been broke, but never so broke that I couldn't afford food. So my perception of things are obviously going to be different than yours.

Since you couldn't do peanut butter and have rejected what I think are inexpensive, viable options, I wonder how you "worked around" the PB ban? What did your son end up eating?
I should probably stay out of this, but I've never been wise.

Your post indicates that you have never gone hungry because of poverty. I had periods of my childhood where if we spent more than about $.15/person/meal we were in serious trouble. Peanut butter can go much much much further than most other things. I lived on peanut butter on cheap gross white bread, top ramen (I am still hopelessly addicted to it--I'm trying to keep my daughter from having it), and occasionally something spendy like spaghetti when it was on sale. That was several years of my life. We didn't buy fruit. We didn't have vegetables. We didn't have meat. I absolutely completely and totally understand peanut bans but people who are arguing in a hostile fashion against peanut butter are often doing so from a point of privilege and it would be nice if you at least understood that.

At this point I have privilege. My daughter eats fresh organic fruits and vegetables daily. She has organic free range meat on the rare occasions she has any meat at all. She eats whole grains. I don't have to give my daughter peanut butter. But I recognize my luxury. Is it possible for other people to stop and consider theirs a little more?
post #173 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by Storm Bride View Post
I sent him with egg salad and sometimes cheese and such. When I say I "worked around", I mean I almost lost my phone, and went without sometimes myself and things like that. I could come up with the extra money (and it did add up to a bit over the course of a month), but it had to come from somewhere...and it tended to snowball, because then I'd owe late payment fees and such.

This isn't even relevant to me, anymore. I spend way too much on food these days. I just remember what it was like back then.
When your kid is the one with food allergies, the costs are enormous. A new epi-pen every year (more if you have to use one), at $99 a pop (that's WITH insurance coverage). The school needs an epi-pen, too, and Benadryl to have on hand. The amount of money I spend on specialty foods is staggering. Specialty flours, crackers, cereals, bread, rice pasta, you name it. We can't buy things like rice or millet from the cheaper bulk bins at the market, because of the high risk of contamination from nuts or wheat. Because US-grown oats tend to be contaminated with wheat, we need to buy the expensive Irish oatmeal if we want her to have that. We buy tons of out-of-season produce, because dd's diet is so limited that we need to build in variety any way we can. Egg replacer or flaxseed for baking--way more expensive than eggs. Then there are high-grade probiotics and vitamin D supplements to help improve her immunity. Any birthday party or event that we go to, we need to provide dd with her own food, so there are never any "freebies" for her.

At school, all the other kids get two snacks provided for them--we have to send not only lunch, but snacks as well (and we don't get a discount off of her tuition, of course). We have to buy expensive, gluten-free play-doh for the entire class, because dd can't use or be around kids using wheat-based play-dohs. If they do any crafts requiring pasta, we have to send in rice pasta for the entire class. We need to find and send non-perishable treats for the teacher to have on hand in case another kid is having a birthday.

I don't mean this as a "poor me" post--just a snippet of what it's like. We are extremely lucky that we are able to afford these things, although it isn't always easy, and we have to economize in other ways. Dd's school is nut-free, so we've never had to deal with parents struggling to provide alternative lunches. But if I knew a parent WAS struggling, I would gladly provide them with a jar of sunbutter each week in order to keep my kid safe and their kid fed.
post #174 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYCVeg View Post
When your kid is the one with food allergies, the costs are enormous. A new epi-pen every year (more if you have to use one), at $99 a pop (that's WITH insurance coverage). The school needs an epi-pen, too, and Benadryl to have on hand. The amount of money I spend on specialty foods is staggering. Specialty flours, crackers, cereals, bread, rice pasta, you name it. We can't buy things like rice or millet from the cheaper bulk bins at the market, because of the high risk of contamination from nuts or wheat. Because US-grown oats tend to be contaminated with wheat, we need to buy the expensive Irish oatmeal if we want her to have that. We buy tons of out-of-season produce, because dd's diet is so limited that we need to build in variety any way we can. Egg replacer or flaxseed for baking--way more expensive than eggs. Then there are high-grade probiotics and vitamin D supplements to help improve her immunity. Any birthday party or event that we go to, we need to provide dd with her own food, so there are never any "freebies" for her.

At school, all the other kids get two snacks provided for them--we have to send not only lunch, but snacks as well (and we don't get a discount off of her tuition, of course). We have to buy expensive, gluten-free play-doh for the entire class, because dd can't use or be around kids using wheat-based play-dohs. If they do any crafts requiring pasta, we have to send in rice pasta for the entire class. We need to find and send non-perishable treats for the teacher to have on hand in case another kid is having a birthday.

I don't mean this as a "poor me" post--just a snippet of what it's like. We are extremely lucky that we are able to afford these things, although it isn't always easy, and we have to economize in other ways. Dd's school is nut-free, so we've never had to deal with parents struggling to provide alternative lunches. But if I knew a parent WAS struggling, I would gladly provide them with a jar of sunbutter each week in order to keep my kid safe and their kid fed.
What a great post. Thanks for giving us a little insight on what it's like on the other side. I've read many of your posts NYCVeg, about your allergic daugher. I am in awe of the wonderful things you do to protect her and help her feel included.
post #175 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by rightkindofme View Post
I absolutely completely and totally understand peanut bans but people who are arguing in a hostile fashion against peanut butter are often doing so from a point of privilege and it would be nice if you at least understood that.

<snip>
I don't have to give my daughter peanut butter. But I recognize my luxury. Is it possible for other people to stop and consider theirs a little more?
There was no hostility in my posting.

Why is your understanding of peanut bans "better" than my understanding of peanut bans? Because you've lived in poverty and I haven't?

Peanut butter has only been around (in this country) for about 100 years. Plenty of poverty-stricken people managed to survive prior to its invention. Seems to me that having peanut butter is the luxury, especially when so many cannot have it due to deadly reactions.
post #176 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYCVeg View Post
When your kid is the one with food allergies, the costs are enormous. A new epi-pen every year (more if you have to use one), at $99 a pop (that's WITH insurance coverage). The school needs an epi-pen, too, and Benadryl to have on hand. The amount of money I spend on specialty foods is staggering. Specialty flours, crackers, cereals, bread, rice pasta, you name it. We can't buy things like rice or millet from the cheaper bulk bins at the market, because of the high risk of contamination from nuts or wheat. Because US-grown oats tend to be contaminated with wheat, we need to buy the expensive Irish oatmeal if we want her to have that. We buy tons of out-of-season produce, because dd's diet is so limited that we need to build in variety any way we can. Egg replacer or flaxseed for baking--way more expensive than eggs. Then there are high-grade probiotics and vitamin D supplements to help improve her immunity. Any birthday party or event that we go to, we need to provide dd with her own food, so there are never any "freebies" for her.

At school, all the other kids get two snacks provided for them--we have to send not only lunch, but snacks as well (and we don't get a discount off of her tuition, of course). We have to buy expensive, gluten-free play-doh for the entire class, because dd can't use or be around kids using wheat-based play-dohs. If they do any crafts requiring pasta, we have to send in rice pasta for the entire class. We need to find and send non-perishable treats for the teacher to have on hand in case another kid is having a birthday.

I don't mean this as a "poor me" post--just a snippet of what it's like. We are extremely lucky that we are able to afford these things, although it isn't always easy, and we have to economize in other ways. Dd's school is nut-free, so we've never had to deal with parents struggling to provide alternative lunches. But if I knew a parent WAS struggling, I would gladly provide them with a jar of sunbutter each week in order to keep my kid safe and their kid fed.
Yes. I know. My niece has a potentially fatal peanut allergy. I don't live with her, but I've been dealing with this from an extended family standpoint for almost 16 years. I know what it's about.

The thing is, there are also parents of peanut allergic kids who couldn't provide the sunbutter. My SIL never even wanted the school to do the peanut free thing that they did (not the same school as ds1, but they are the same age). My SIL has also bought lots of bulk items, and crossed her fingers about cross-contamination.

I totally understand that parents of children with peanut allergies are dealing with a whole lot of issues that I don't have to deal with. The only point I was trying to make in the first place is that other parents can also be dealing with things that don't show on the surface. That's all.
post #177 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2xy View Post
There was no hostility in my posting.

Why is your understanding of peanut bans "better" than my understanding of peanut bans? Because you've lived in poverty and I haven't?

Peanut butter has only been around (in this country) for about 100 years. Plenty of poverty-stricken people managed to survive prior to its invention. Seems to me that having peanut butter is the luxury, especially when so many cannot have it due to deadly reactions.
Plenty of poverty-stricken people have also been deficient in protein and other nutrients. In any case, there are treatments for allergic reactions that are available now and weren't available 100 years ago...that doesn't mean I'm going to say that it's a "luxury" that parents of children with potentially fatal allergies can buy an epi-pen. To compare what we have now with what was available 100 years ago, and say "it's a luxury that you have that" is true, in the broad sense. It's also a complete red herring. I also have electricity and running water. Those are definitely luxuries, as there are plenty of people in the world who have neither...but they're not a luxury in the usual sense of the word luxury - and neither is peanut butter.
post #178 of 187
Quote:
Originally Posted by Storm Bride View Post
I also have electricity and running water. Those are definitely luxuries, as there are plenty of people in the world who have neither...but they're not a luxury in the usual sense of the word luxury - and neither is peanut butter.
If peanut butter is not a luxury, then neither is food, in general.
post #179 of 187
Ive actually never had anyone offer DD1 anything other than stickers at WDW without asking me first. Definetly not anything food related. The few times someone wanted to give her something they asked me outside her hearing range first then offered it to her. That way if I didn't want her to have it she didn't hear anything about it. Maybe its where Im living right now (I live in Japan) but they seem to realize that its not a good idea to offer children food without their parents consent.
post #180 of 187
My beef with the focus some schools have on peanut allergies is why single out that one allergen? Last time I checked people can and many do have life threatening allergies to all types of things. But you know what, no one ever bothered to ban dust, or cat hair, or peaches in schools. Heck, my highschool didn't even ban perfume and I can promise you it caused some big problems for at least one student who had multipul chemical sensitivities which are life threatening to her. So why keep the focus on just one allergy if the goal is to keep all kids safe.
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