"It's not always about you!"

[Surfacing]

: Okay, I shamefully admit that during a Not-Good-Parenting-Moment, I blurted this one out a few months ago. I know, not good. It was a message to myself to create more balance and revisit my boundaries, it's my responsibility to ensure my needs are met, etc.

Well, dd1 has taken it up. If I ask her to do something she doesn't want to do, then she says, "It's not always about you!" She throws it out at some other choice moments.

Sigh. You reep what you sow. Okay, so now, how do I respond to this one? Because in truth, saying this is just not an appropriate way to deal with a problem.

I try to reflect back what the issue is and commiserate, but gads, I'd love it if she never said that again. Wishful thinking. Ideas?

[~LadyBug~]

I had one of those moments a few months back with the choice phrase "SHUT UP" while I was trying to hear my Ob on the phone and both girls were screaming like crazy (it was game; scream every time mom is on the phone) I told them firmly "I am sorry I said that to you. It is not nice to say and mommy made a mistake. We do not use those words." I said that several times, and made SURE Dh and I never, never say it and they quit saying it, I guess they got bored.

[orangefoot]

I have four children and sometimes it isn't all about just one of them: that is just the reality of being in a family.

None of my children has ever said it to me but at times when I am trying to balance everyone's needs and I fail to meet someone's *wants* I have been heard to say this.

[tbone_kneegrabber]

I taught (accidentally) my kid and the kid I watch "go away" ( i wasn't even talking to them!)

But in your case I would respond, "No its not always about me or you, but right now it *is* about cleaning up your toys" or whatever thing is that you want her to do

[Surfacing]

Originally Posted by orangefoot

I have four children and sometimes it isn't all about just one of them: that is just the reality of being in a family.

None of my children has ever said it to me but at times when I am trying to balance everyone's needs and I fail to meet someone's *wants* I have been heard to say this.

Yeah, thanks for this.

[aran]

I've said it too.

I've had it said to me, too. I think it was really good to have it said to me, because I would tend to be internally focused and self-centered otherwise.

So I think it's OK to remind a kid about that... though it's probably best not to be too harsh about it. Like... don't yell it. (Not that I have in a stressed out moment .