September Pagan Circle - Page 28

[singin_angel]

Gun - wow! I don't know what to say...just lots of for you!

[DaughterOfKali]

Heather- I am so very sad for you. So, so sorry. Many hugs to you and I will keep you in my thoughts/prayers.

[BellaLuna Rayne]

Oh Heather, I am so sorry. *big hugs* I'll light a candle for you....as soon as I find one in my messy room.

I had my second counseling appointment today and it went really well. I am really liking my counselor so far. I go back to see her again on Thursday. I have a small mission to spend 24 hours being selfish in the next 3 days. Should be a challenge. I need to think about what I want moment to moment, etc.

[southernmommie]

gun- I am so very sorry to hear the sad news. I don't even know what to say. So very sorry.

[mary3mama]

Oh, gun, I am heartbroken for you.

Sorry I didn't reply earlier...dh is now off on his week away working his company's annual convention. Not much computer time this week...

[CariOfOz]

Heather, how awful... I don't even know what to say I had a coworker that happened to a long time ago... only her baby had been with her a month. My heart ached for her.. and aches for you

[redveg]

gun, how horrible. Words won't come. Hugs to you and your family. I am so sorry.

[Maiasaura]

Originally Posted by redveg

They sort of look like a mink/weasel only with long claws and sharp teeth. They eat a lot of porcupines around here, but if you let your cat out at night they will eat them if they can.

Those sound like something from a horror movie! I have never heard of them. Where do you live? I'm so glad we don't have those here!

Originally Posted by wombatclay

So, I found out what the road crews are doing. They ripped out gardens and roadside plantings not to widen the road and make it safer but to dig out those horrible "car killer" ditches.


last night he DID NOT SLEEP. Well, that's almost true. He'd sleep if he had a nipple in his mouth. But remove nipple and within seconds the totally floppy zonked out sleep beast transformed into wide awake scream machine. I'm wiped out. So this advice is super timely for me...

That's awful, about the roads. I hate those ditches.

Tor...how old is he? I'm hoping against hope for you that he doesn't have colic. Oh, mama, I hope it's just a thang

Originally Posted by singin_angel

I'm home from my course...half way done! I got perfect on my interview skills performance check and my mid-course interview had all positive comments on it. I also rocked my military writing practice performance check (the real one is this upcoming weekend).

DH cleaned the desk while I was gone...it looks awesome!

Yay! Go you.
And what an awesome DH!

Originally Posted by southernmommie

On a positive note... MY HUBBY IS COMING HOME SOONER THAN PLANNED!!! He may actually be here for the birth of this baby! YAY!! I'm so excited.

Oh, that's great, I bet you are so happy! Not that I can tell from your post, or anything

Originally Posted by gun

I am devastated. I rec'd a phone call from the agency to let us know that the birthmother has changed her mind and Niles will have to go back.. I am in shock.

Oh. My. Gods. gun, omg, that's awful!! Poor you, oh, mama. My eyes are just huge, I can't believe it. I'm so, so sorry, mama. I hope things turn around for you, somehow. I am utterly speechless

[gun]

We are waiting for contact by CPS to come get him. Yes, CPS had to get involved. There is a huge possibility that he will into foster care because the bmom's current living situation is so bad right now. My mind is blown and our hearts are breaking. We are all a total mess. And poor little Niles will have to just deal with this direction of his life. I know there are good foster homes, but I know we have loved this little boy hard and I don't think any other home could do it, because we believed he was our son.

Thank you for the support you have all shown me on this journey. I am really grappling with this whole thing. This past year we have had a failed adoption match, a miscarriage, a few useless rounds on a fertility med, and now a failed adoptive placement. Should I just give up?

[DaughterOfKali]

She wants him but can't provide a safe home for him?? I wish she'd just do the right thing for her son instead of having him go into foster care. It's just not fair.

[Aeress]

Gun- That just isn't right- *hugs*

Bella is still sick. I am better, feeling rather restless having been in my house for days and I am wondering if the other 2 will get it or not. =for my Bella.

I also made a huge decision and while I know it is for the best, it was so hard. After being back to work at the school for 3weeks, I kept having this nagging feeling that something just wasn't right. I kept trying to say it was this, or that but what it really was, was me missing my time with Erin. She is little and needs me and the school doesn't need 2 teachers right now, so I am helping with the school 2-3 days a week and will teach once the school grows or once Erin is school-aged. It was a very hard decision. The school also took a slight turn, as we could not get our code variance, so we are homeschooling our kids until we can get a permanent location. It has been a rather stressful time but it does have a happy ending. I missed homeschooling.

[saphire]

Gun- That's heartbreaking and awful. I'm so sorry. Don't give up, but just maybe take a break from trying so hard? I'm so sorry this is happening.


BLR- it's great news you've found a counselor you like. Keep up the good work.

Originally Posted by southernmommie

On a positive note... MY HUBBY IS COMING HOME SOONER THAN PLANNED!!! He may actually be here for the birth of this baby! YAY!! I'm so excited.

That's awesome!

I'm surprised at how many irl friends of mine I'm seeing on the mothering facebook shot here. wow!

[Valerie.Qc]

Originally Posted by wombatclay

So, I found out what the road crews are doing. They ripped out gardens and roadside plantings not to widen the road and make it safer but to dig out those horrible "car killer" ditches. For those who don't live in regions where they do this, these are ditches that are 3-4 feet deep and sheer sided. They're dug out about a foot from the edge of the blacktop. The "purpose" is to provide a place to dump snow as well as to provide "safety" by preventing people from parking along the roadside.

Of course, what they actually do is create a huge hazard because there is no place to pull off... if you slide on the ice you drop into a 4 foot deep ditch instead of sliding into the siding, there is no place to walk except actually on the road so pedestrians are more or less sitting ducks, if another car is in your lane or stops suddenly there is no place to swerve to avoid them, and if you need to pull over to use a cell phone or change a diaper or what have you then you're plain out of luck.

They've dug out ditches on both sides of the road and it's horrible. They're still at it this morning... each day they come back and dig things a little deeper. They even brought in one of those huge chipper things to take out smaller trees that were in their way.

~~~~~
sleep- Tor is going through a growth spurt and ye gods and little green apples, last night he DID NOT SLEEP. Well, that's almost true. He'd sleep if he had a nipple in his mouth. But remove nipple and within seconds the totally floppy zonked out sleep beast transformed into wide awake scream machine. I'm wiped out. So this advice is super timely for me...

We have those kind of roads around here too.

(((good vibes))) for Easy Restfull Nights.

Originally Posted by southernmommie

On a positive note... MY HUBBY IS COMING HOME SOONER THAN PLANNED!!! He may actually be here for the birth of this baby! YAY!! I'm so excited.

Happy for you!

Originally Posted by gun

I am devastated. I rec'd a phone call from the agency to let us know that the birthmother has changed her mind and Niles will have to go back.. I am in shock.

(((big hugs)))


BellaLuna, selfish is good.

[DaughterOfKali]

Originally Posted by Aeress

I missed homeschooling.

I'm sorry Bella is still sick.

I'm glad you get to have more time with her. Looks like everything is working out for the best for you and your dd.

[gun]

We just had to drop off Niles to be reunited with his birthmom. It's over.

[wombatclay]

Aeress- hugs. That can't have been an easy decision. I hope it brings peace.

gun- how are you doing? I'm so, so sorry. There just aren't words.

Tor- he's five weeks and a few days. I'm pretty sure it's a growth spurt since it's the right time for one (4-6 weeks, he's doing it 24 hours a day, and because he isn't "unreasonable"... he just wants to eat. I remember with Ro there was nothing that stopped the crying. Nursing, swaddling, ssshhhing, ealking with her in the sling, the football carry, etc. She'd just cry. At the moment Tor cries if he isn't nursing or at least in close proximity to the breast though he will gurgle and google for a few minutes here and there. Not to mention, he's up to 14lbs! We've been calling him the meatball. I've got recent pics on flickr here. He nursed every hour again last night and today is swapping marathon nursing with loooooong sling naps so fingers crossed we're almost through this one! The timing was a bit twitchy since the increase demand means increase supply means engorged breasts... and I just finished my mastitis abx.

Fall foliage- I agree... this year seems to be more muted in color. More goldenrod yellows, maroons, burnt umberm and plain old brown. We've had two days of steady downpour (yesterday there was even hail!) and a lot of leaves are already down. Many hadn't even changed color much, they were just starting to change and then the wind/rain took them down. The season may improve, but compared to past years this one is a bit off.

[BellaLuna Rayne]

Heather- *hugs* I am so sorry. I wish I had the words to make it all better.

Clay- He's gorgeous! All your kids are beautiful!

I have to go pick up my EBT card today. I have a feeling I won't make the 11:30-12:00 opening. So I may just go to the little mall across the street and get me some fooood. I still have a few bucks left.

[Vojerleda]

Originally Posted by gun

We just had to drop off Niles to be reunited with his birthmom. It's over.

Heather- I hope you can find some peace in your day. I'm thinking about you, and that you can find warmth and solace somewhere.

[CariOfOz]

Heather... I am so sorry for your whole family's loss. And poor Niles being pulled from your loving home to be placed in foster care because she changed her mind, but can't even provide a safe HOME??? It just should.not.be. Honestly, I have no advice or answer to your question.. because I can't even imagine the pain and discouragement you must feel


Clay, major cuteness there hun

I'm going to call the doc today.. I think. This cough.will.not.stop and my chest feels so heavy & wheezy... I'm just afraid I'll get there and be told I'll just have to wait it out, thus wasting my time and 60$ (although half gets deposited back into my bank acct) Or at the other extreme.. I'm afraid she'll tell me it HAS developed into pnemonia now

[DaughterOfKali]

Cari- You poor dear. It does sound like pneumonia now.