my midwife is against waterbirth, pls help

[CalmCenter]

My homebirth midwife is against birthing in water. She does provide a tub for laboring if I want it. She told me the first meeting that she doesn't like/support birthing in the water and why. She said (as the other midwife in our town also says) that she believes that water birth is not safe for the baby and the baby has a hard time breathing afterwards or presents other complications.

I felt in my heart that she is afraid of losing control in water birth, as the birth is not as accessible to the midwife in comparison with a land birth. This is just my take on it.

At the time, I accepted her view, and honestly only having 2 choices in our town, and they both said the same thing, I didn't have many options.

But now, getting close to my 3rd trimester, I am feeling more and more drawn to having the option of birthing in water. It is my first birth, so I like having a midwife to support me and guide me, but I don't want to be limited or to not have a water birth only because my midwife is afraid of it.

I don't know what to do. Has anyone else had a midwife who was against water birth?

I could really use some support and sage advise. Thanks!

[kltroy]

My advice? Let it go. Birth rarely happens exactly as we envision it, and it's entirely possible that you would not end up in the water for the actual birth even if you had planned a water birth. I certainly know of many many moms for whom this is the case (ie they had a nice warm tub sitting empty in their house or in the birth center, but they ended up on the bed/toilet/floor for the actual birth). When it comes down to it you and your MW will find what works for you and I'm sure your birth will be perfect, however it ends up. Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy!

[HappyMommy2]

I would talk to the mw more about it. This does seem odd. However - if I had to choose between a mw that thought this vs a hospital, I would choose the mw every time.

Does she know not to cut the cord until it stops pulsing? The baby gets pulled out of the water quickly, and comes directly from your womb full of water, so the breathing fear is unfounded.

I gave birth in the water, on all fours. The mw caught the baby behind me and handed it to me between my legs, it all took about one second or less for the baby to be out of the water.

Get the tub and see how you feel. Once you are laboring in it, and start pushing, maybe she will follow your lead, your needs, and your body. That is the beauty of midwifery care!

[tallulahma]

i would have problems with the fact that she is basing her care on fears rather than facts.

just my opinion... Yes I would chose her over a hospital birth, but I would want more info from her, research to back up what she says.

My water birth was amazing and i found the water to be an incredible pain reliever... I can not imagine giving birth outside of water... personally.

[smeep]

Originally Posted by tallulahma

i would have problems with the fact that she is basing her care on fears rather than facts.

just my opinion... Yes I would chose her over a hospital birth, but I would want more info from her, research to back up what she says.

My water birth was amazing and i found the water to be an incredible pain reliever... I can not imagine giving birth outside of water... personally.

I second ALL of this. And I would give her some info on the safety of waterbirth.

DS was a waterbirth and had perfect APGARs. Of course it doesn't necessarily prove anything just as, "My baby was formula fed/born by cesarean/induced/started solids at 2 days, etc., and is just fine," doesn't prove anything either. But I've seen nothing to prove that our outcome was in the minority.

I can't imagine giving birth on land either, and I didn't even plan to birth in the water! I just did what my instincts told me when I got the urge to push and got in the water without saying anything. I would've thrown a FIT if my midwife told me I couldn't birth in the water for reasons that were not evidence-based.

[sarahn4639]

I would tell her you are really drawn to the idea of birthing in water and ask her for some reasearch to help you make a more informed decision. The majority of reasearch I've read on it says that is not an issue, but because she informed you of this up front I would honestly not push it too hard. It sucks that you are limited in your options! You can also just play it by ear and if when you start feeling pushy just not get out. Does this seem like something she's hard core on or was she stating her preferences for birth? I planned a water birth but got out because I needed my MW to break my water (he wasn't moving past a very strong bag!) and I just couldn't get back in after that because I was right into hard core pushing. My MW said she was totally fine with water birth but I've heard several stories from other clients that she pushed them to get out for birth. I think it is harder on MWs because they have less ability to see and "control" the birth in the water. It's your birth first and foremost, but your care providers comort levels are important too. Try talking with her more on this. Sorry for the rambling post!

[Evergreen]

See what happens during labor. If you don't feel like getting out of the water to birth- just don't. She'll bend to accommodate you.

[Astraia]

See if she's OK at least labouring in water. If you HAVE to get out to push... well, at least you can have the pain relief of water during some of the most intense stuff.

And you could always refuse to get out of the water... sometimes you just CAN'T do what they want you to do, it happens. She just might not take you again as a client, which would be sad.... (and i feel bad lying to midwives).

[laohaire]

Originally Posted by Evergreen

See what happens during labor. If you don't feel like getting out of the water to birth- just don't. She'll bend to accommodate you.

I agree with this. No need to fight about it or make it an issue. Either you end up not birthing in water after all for whatever reason (my friend puked in the pool and then didn't feel like staying in it! ) or you want to stay and you just stay. Odds are strongly in your favor that she won't make it a huge issue, maybe she'll try to cajole you out. If she does try hard to get you out, is your partner on board to gently but firmly run interference for you?

I birthed on hands and knees in the water. Midwife did not have to get in with me, and she caught. Honestly, I have zero recollection of how DD was given to me but it was fine. I think midwife brought her out of the water and I just hooked a leg over. No breathing problems (apgars 9 and 10).

At some point in labor, everyone wanted me out of the tub so they could drain it and refill it (I'd been in there a whlie and it was getting visibly dirty). I told them I was sorry, but I was not getting out. I was in laborland but vaguely noticed that they just drained the tub halfway with me still in it, and then filled it back up again. Fine by me. It wasn't an issue.

[lness]

I agree that she's probably not going to drag you out herself if you just stay put. I had a waterbirth - I couldn't have gotten out at that point no matter what. If they had asked me to, I'm not sure I even would have really understood what they wanted. MW caught DD right away, and had her out of the water before I even turned around.
I wanted out right after, though. It had been a while and I got cold and the shakes, and wanted to be in bed.
You should probably try to talk to her, at least to make your feelings clear, but once you get there, you'll all just have to go with whatever feels right.

[Pirogi]

I am sorry you are facing this issue. As a student midwife, it makes me angry to see some midwives carrying on the tradition of coercion, harassment, and control over birthing women.

I agree with others who say the midwife is probably still a better option than hospital birth. Also, I think bringing her information that you find on waterbirth safety and asking her for sources to back up her claims is a great idea. Given that there are no other midwife options in your area (unless you would consider UC), I would not press the issue with her. Just raise it again, let her know that you understand her position, but that you might feel like birthing in the water. Even if she says that is unacceptable, don't agree with her. Just leave it hanging. Then birth on your own terms.

Good luck, and happy birthing.

[JennTheMomma]

I would talk to her more about it and present research that shows safety of birthing in the water. It seems like your MW doesn't want to lose control over the birth, and this is really your birth and you should be allowed to birth in the water.

[MotheringHeart]

I agree with much of what has been suggested. She *cannot* make you get out of the water. Make sure that you and DP are on the same page and that she does not try to use them to coerce you out. I would also suggest doing a bunch of research and handing it over to her. My mom is a CNM practicing in a hospital and managed to convince the hospital board of the safety of water birth, so I know good research is out there.

Good luck!

[Veritaserum]

Originally Posted by Evergreen

See what happens during labor. If you don't feel like getting out of the water to birth- just don't. She'll bend to accommodate you.

I would hope so! However, I know of two women IRL who were birthing with a local midwife who isn't comfortable with water birth. With both of them, she had them get out of the tub while pushing. One of them was crowning at the time with no apparent problem. Both women got out because they thought there was some kind of issue going on with their babies. That wasn't the case, though. The midwife was just worried about water birth.

So, yeah, if it were me, I'd simply stay in the tub. I can't imagine moving like that while pushing. I loved how easy it was to change positions in the tub. During my last birth, I was squatting because that felt right, but then I was getting a cramp in my leg (bad timing!). Because I was in the tub I was able to quickly and easily move to my knees. While I think I could have done that on land, it sure seems like it would be more difficult.

I'd ask her to read more info about waterbirth and/or discuss her specific concerns. I'll bet Barbara Harper has some good info on her waterbirth site.

[MegBoz]

Hm... I"m not so sure about the "just don't get out of the tub/ do it anyway" advice.

It's not the same issue - but I remember reading threads here on vaginal breech birth and how you don't necessarily want to FORCE your HCP to attend your birth under circumstances they don't feel are safe. (Well, in the case of vaginal breech, they could yank on the baby & cause problems, so that's a different issue.)

I know the personal 'comfort' of the MW should NOT be your concern. That is not what I'm saying!

BUT... you do trust her and respect her experience & education when it comes to helping you - helping determine if there is a legitimate problem that demands her personal action or transfer. So if you willfully do something you KNOW she doesn't consider safe & isn't comfortable with, doesn't that sorta throw a wrench in the whole trusting-the-HCP-to-make-sure-we're-safe relationship??

Of course, talking to her about it more & sharing research can't hurt.

[zoebird]

as others have said, i think it's largely a matter of how is goes. i thought about birthing in water and labored in my tub, but ultimately birthed out of water because it's what felt right. after the birth, for reasons unknown to me, i got back into the water and birthed the placenta there. LOL

anyway, it's not as if this decision is mw vs hospital or midwive vs UC (another option), but rather, what you feel comfortable with and want.

i agree that if you don't feel like getting out of the tub, then don't. no one can force you. and while it does bring up questions of the relationhsip between hcp and client, i don't think this is one of those things that goes overboard or what have you

[mwherbs]

that both California midwives in your area have decided to not provide water birth - I would say something has happened in your area- 1-2 births with poor outcome.
Or it could be something like water quality in your region, I know one town on the NE side of the state years ago that the whole town had sewage contaminated water, caused a great deal of illness and exposure to hepatitis
one way or another I would say that it is something experiential for these midwives on the other hand
it is very hard to move a woman who is pushing- just get in and out of the tub normally to use the bathroom and if you start pushing and want to stay in the tub- then stay in the tub

[CalmCenter]

Thanks for all your sage advice Mamas!

Thanks everyone for some great input and things to ponder.

I am planning on bringing the subject up with my MW again soon to understand her stance more and to gently open up the topic. When I first heard her opinion I thought it must be shared by many midwives. Once I found out that it is not, I started to wonder what is up.

So I think I should find out more and see if I can create more of an opening for myself during the birthing process. All of your comments have been really helpful.

[kltroy]

I was thinking a bit more about this. I think the thing is, she told you up front that she doesn't like water births. Just as it is your decision to work with any HCP that you want, it is her decision to run her practice any way she wants. Ideally, you two will work as a team and the outcome will be the birth that you want. I think your plan of discussing it further is a good one. It may be that you assume she dislikes them for one reason (loss of control) and in fact she dislikes them for an entirely different reason (maybe she's had a bad outcome with a water birth?) Either way, I think letting her know up front how you feel and feeling out how flexible she will be on this is important for both of you.

[aramat]

Check out Waterbirth International and Barbara Harper's book Gentle Birth Choices, and also tell your midwife about them. At the least, you can make a gentle effort at encouraging your midwife to become a little more educated about the potential benefits of water. You can also email Waterbirth Int'l; I've met Barbara before, and she is a super-nice lady, but I've also heard from others that they were very helpful to get in touch with.