September Already! November '05 Mamas & Kiddos thread

[spughy]

Just starting the new thread... not much new here, I'm tethered to the stove today making ketchup. It's a lot of work but worth every bit. I canned a pile of tomatoes yesterday too... contemplating getting more, but only in 10 lb boxes, the 35 lbs I got yesterday was a bit much, especially since I'm fighting a cold and all I really want to do is sit on the couch.

Rowan is snuffly too but pretending she isn't, so I guess she's not too sick. Tomorrow we get to go to her school to meet the teachers and so she can check everything out. Should be interesting!

old thread

[Queen of Cups]

We're going to Ellie's school on Friday to meet the new preschool teacher. I'm excited! Killian is still loving public school, and he has a really great teacher. I'm a bit nervous about Ellie's new teacher because she was trained as a Waldorf teacher, and I'm much more into Montessori and Reggio Amelia methods. But we're only doing the half-day program with her this year so I'll have plenty of time at home with her to work on the things they don't work on at school. Ellie is very excited! (and I'm very relieved to go from having two kids in private school full time to one child in private school for half-days - its a difference of about $460/month!!)

Well, I'm exhausted and I somehow need to deep clean the whole house before my best friend arrives Friday night to spend the weekend. Wish me luck!

[flapjack]

Here. Good luck with the cleaning, Queenie!

Spughy Feel better soon, okay?

[HoneyTree]

Hey, y'all.

We're traveling tomorrow (a week at the beach with one pale, pale, pale baby...I''m worried), so today is the laundry/packing day. Fox has a cold, so he's strapped to my back so he can rest while I go about the house getting stuff done.

I work very hard at positive thinking, but I am just having the hardest damn time with housework. I like about 50% of it, and the other 50% I detest. The hated 50% includes anything in the kitchen, from putting away groceries to doing a sinkload of dishes; picking toys out of the little piles of dog hair that gather in the corners of the house (I must admit that many just get thrown away rather than I having to touch them); and dealing with the clutter that has no home (again, sometimes I just start pitching).

This is a larger part of my life now than it has been in the past, so forgive me as I adjust.

Meanwhile, we put up another batch of beer (Sun Goddess Honey Wheat--seemed fitting for the end of summer). The first batch went by WAY too quickly.

[MelW]

Beer, ketchup... I need to get more food in my diet. I finally feel like I'm making some positive progress with Nora's gut and am getting optimistic about one day eating again. I really loathe feeling like a freak asking allergy-related questions (What kind of oil do you cook this in? Are there any preservatives in this? What is this sweetened with? What kind of sugar? etc.) But it is always an education and reminder about what food is, and how much cr@p is in most everything.

Neela and Matt have watched the original Star Wars trilogy and she is completely obsessed. She's planning Hallowe'en costumes already. Didn't you guys do that one year, gunter? Or was it Helen? Nora gets to be Yoda. I'm "princess Leia's mum". Neela wants Matt to be Chewbacca, but sometimes wavers about the need for Luke Skywalker, too. She's been having me do Leia braid/buns in her hair some mornings.

Preschool starts next week. We're getting into our fall rhythm/routine and making plans for a regular but flexible schedule of weekly activities with preschool, visits to the library, playing with friends, and likely a ton of trips to Science World because we have a membership and it's easy (not to mention that Neela looooves riding the skytrain to go there). Plus lots of free time to play Playmobil, which is an ongoing hit (and now the figures are stand-ins for star wars characters). We started making little daily "to do" lists with Neela and it's really helped her deal with transitions between errands and activities better. I write one with illustrations for her, and she's been so interested in writing recently that she usually writes one out, too. Writing is tricky for left-handed kids, and so counter-intuitive. Anyone else have a lefty? Her letters are getting more legible, but she's always trying to figure out how to see what she's writing.

I got a gift certificate for a French class and just did my placement tests and am starting next week. It's a good way to have enforced time to do something for myself. It's every Friday evening, so Matt is planning a "date" movie night at home with Neela (aka TV babysitting so he can handle bedtime with both kids). Since he's working an insane amount this fall I'm glad that he'll have some time dedicated to the kids every week.

And we're still working towards the move at the end of the year. Trying not to think about it too much...

The IUD is finally fixed and working. It took a little more pushiness with the doctor, but I got what I wanted. And I'm sending off a box of most of the little baby clothes to my sister, who is expecting her first (a girl) in late December/early January.

[Queen of Cups]

Both my kids are lefties, and DH and I are both right-handed. We were surprised. I think the hardest part is trying to show them correct strokes with the pencil, its hard to translate it from right to left. I try to write letters with my left hand when I'm showing them, but I have terrible control and my letters aren't very pretty. Killian had major writing-stress last year because he couldn't make the letters as perfect as grownups - he inherited perfectionism from both DH and me, poor thing.

[Gunter]

september weather makes me sooooo happy. we are having some minor house stuff done by this great handyman guy who lives near us. my house feels so fresh with just a new shelf or two and a coat/hat rack hung, a door fixed, etc. it's pretty awesome.

these girls of mine are growing up way too quickly. bux is feeding herself and wants to sit in a regular/adutls sized chair at dinner. ez wants to know how to spell people's names. i sometimes want to whip ice out of my fingertips and freeze them in time. i am pretty stoked about being a un/homeschooler these days...we're finding waldorfy stuff very inspiring, too. love that we can mix things up like that.

here's to keeping up with you all this month!

[HoneyTree]

Mel, sounds like the scheduling--from to-do list items to date night--is working out well! There's a Frog and Toad story about a to-do list that's really cute. Woody wanted to make one the day we read it, but ours that day was much like Toad's: Get up, eat breakfast, go for a walk, eat lunch, take a rest, etc. I am so smitten with life with young kids right now. I look back on my day when I lay in bed at night and I'm so happy that I got to hang out with them. How nice that Nora will have a close-in-age cousin!

Woody's a lefty. He showed handedness strong and early. People kept telling us that you really can't tell until # years, but you could with him. Mel, what makes you say that writing for lefties is counter-intuitive? No one at all in my family is a lefty, so I have no experience whatsoever. Woody likes to write, but he definitely goes letter by letter, not so much flow. When I model how to do a letter for him, I tell him out loud the shapes of the lines and places where they connect; that seemed to give him so assistance while letting him decide what felt good in his hand. So, for example, a capital D is a tall stick then a half-circle.

Gunter, I love the image of shooting time-freezing ice from your fingers! Woody's into superheroes right now, and I'm always Spidermom. Once he gave me a break and let me be Firestorm with a baby.

[flapjack]

Skye is still on the fence, but seems likely to be a leftie- if she follows Isaac's pattern, we have one more switch from left to right and back again, which is probably going to come at the point where pen control really clicks. We're not even trying letters at this point, just shapes, and she's suddenly made the click that she can draw pictures that look like pictures and not just beautiful coloured scribbles

I'm having a tough time emotionally. Alex got beaten up on his way home from school yesterday by a couple of boys who were in his class last year- they're 11, FFS. THEN my two went out to play and broke the cardinal rule of "let someone know where you are" and THEN this hit the national news last night. (Warning, triggering link regarding child-to-child cruelty.) I'm left wondering quite what the world is coming to, and whether I made a huge mistake bringing kids into it

[MelW]

Helen I didn't click the link because of today's mood, but might look in the future. I can guess, though...

Wow, a lot of lefties in our group! I think that lefties most naturally would write from right to left. Neela has "my lumps" which is a style of writing that she does from right to left, and "your letters" which is regular letters. Even when writing individual letters she does some "backwards"- draws the loop of a P, then the line. And she lifts her hand a lot so she can see what she's doing. I spend a lot of time sitting on my hands, because I'm trying to watch and let her figure things out...but it is tempting to suggest "easier" ways to write. Though I'm not sure if they are easier for a lefty. I'm likely over-thinking all of this a little, though. I read an article about pencil grip and paper angle for proper and best ergonomics for lefties, but don't know how much applies to a not-quite-four year old. So for know I watch and learn from her learning. It's a common theme around here.

Neela did write a very cute "sorry I ripped the book" letter to the librarian, which was the impetus for all of the recent interest in writing. Then she made a "to do" list that said: Write letter to librarian. Go to library.

[Gunter]

DH is a lefty so he always wants the babes to be lefties. they switch back and forth with painting but ez favors her right with drawing and *writing*.

speaking of writing, i am in such denial about her wanting to write people's names. ugh, this whole growing up thing is happening too quick for my liking.

at the same time, i am so happy for her to have an interest and to have the attention span to focus on making letters. precious child.

hosted stitch and bitch tonight and it was so great. i am really thankful for my ladies. really. thankful.

[spughy]

Rowan is completely uninterested in writing at this point. She can spell her own name verbally, but can't pick it out of a group of names, especially if there is another one that starts with "R", as we discovered yesterday looking at the coat hooks in her school. Despite riding up the elevator to Daddy's office a gazillion times, she still seems to have a hard time distinguishing "2" from "3".

I think she has inherited my writing/artistic skills - or lack thereof. I kept some of my schoolwork from when I was 5 and 6 and I was really, really behind at that age. My printing was barely legible and my artwork was at the level you'd expect from an average 3-year-old. At the moment, Rowan still just does colourful scribbles - exactly the same as she's done since she first discovered markers. She likes colours, but she can't turn them into things that look like things. I tried to show her how to make some letters, and any letters with one simple circle connected to things went almost ok (b and p etc.) but things like g and k and h were just not on. And she got frustrated and ran off very quickly.

Now, I don't recall being particularly traumatized by my inability to form adequate shapes with a pencil early in life - although that "D" in printing in grade one certainly stuck with me... I had no difficulty learning to read, and that was pretty much all I cared about. I just hope that Rowan is the same way, because I don't think she's going to be one of those kids writing 2-page letters to Santa or the tooth fairy at age 5.

Oh, and she's very definitely right-handed. We've known that from the minute she started eating with a spoon. She never even attempted to do it with her left hand. DH's family has a lot of lefties, but mine has none - I guess that's dominant genes in action.

[MelW]

spughy, I love seeing and hearing about how different all of our kids are in their areas of interest and development. I hope that Rowan finds more supportive schooling that you did. Perhaps the computer age will be helpful and she can type her letters if she wants

We're recovering from a ridiculously long day and a pesticide fiasco from the landlord's attempt to rid our house of silverfish. Some poor decisions were made, and we spent the afternoon trying to make our house safe for ourselves and the kids. And Neela is sick and has a fever and was awake for the day at 4 this morning because she was "too sweaty". We still dragged her around the Aquarium while our house was ventilating, so if it's swine flu we're great contributors to the pandemic. Nora is asleep and Neela on her way, and I have no mixer in the house but am contemplating just having a shot or two of gin. My landlord bought us beer to apologize for the mess up, but I can't drink it.

[Gunter]

[QUOTEI have no mixer in the house but am contemplating just having a shot or two of gin. My landlord bought us beer to apologize for the mess up, but I can't drink it.[/QUOTE]

go for it. sitting here with a second glass of wine b/c it's been one of those days...weekends? thought holidays were supposed to be fun? ugh.

[HoneyTree]

Helen, first, lots and lots and lots of hugs. I am so terribly sad and angry and desperate in the face of child-to-child cruelty. I deeply understand how the violence percolates down in our society, but it still makes me bubble with bad feelings. (I just had a picture in my mind of the end of the Neverending Story when Bastian is riding Falcor the dragon through the city and they chase down the bully kids. I will hold that picture and insert Alex!)

So, my last few days:

1. Spend a bunch of money fixing stuff on the Volvo to be able to drive down to Orlando.

2. Volvo breaks down on the way to Orlando. Lots more money.

3. Get Volvo fixed, back on the interstate by midnight.

4. Volvo breaks again.

5. Wait at a rest stop for three hours for mom to come get us.

6. Whole family contracts Fox's cold.

7. In Orlando, find out a few things that are challenging me atm:

a. nephew (son of older sister) is feeling like an outsider at school, so wants to attend the fundamentalist church that all the preppy kids go to

b. sister (younger) is dating someone who carries a concealed gun, and says he's making her rethink some of her formerly held beliefs

c. friend just had a baby...by C-section...in a city with one of the highest C-section rates in the U.S....because her labor was stalled

So do y'all mind if I join you for a virtual cocktail?

[Queen of Cups]

I'll join you in the virtual cocktail! My BFF visited this weekend and her dog attacked Ellie. Ellie is okay, not hurt even enough to have to go to the hospital... but it was really d@mn scary. The dog bit her on the face and ear, we were within sight but not within reach so it bit her twice by the time we got to them. My friend was beyond distraught and felt terrible. I had an absolute phobia of dogs for years because my grandmother's dog bit me when I was about Ellie's age, so this was seriously one of my worst nightmares come true. However, Ellie recovered almost immediately and when my friend and her dog left to go home this morning she said, "I miss Penny [the dog] so, so much!" Our puppy is growing up around the kids, so they wrestle with her, hug her, pull on her, etc and she is fine with it (loves the attention). My friend's dog is a 60-lb nine year old Airedale with anxiety problems (recently taken off anti-depressants) who used to belong to a little old lady that bred show dogs - never around cats or kids. Ellie was sitting with the dog, petting it, and leaned over to rest her head on its side and it just snapped - snarling, barking, biting. Anyway, this obviously put a serious downer on the rest of the weekend. I asked my friend to keep her dog on the leash for the rest of the weekend whenever the kids were awake and she immediately agreed... but it was still awkward/stressful. (Not to mention her dog also terrorizes our two cats and snapped at our dog several times.)

Ellie's injuries really are minimal. She has bruising below one eyebrow and in front of her ear on the left side of her face, and puncture wounds behind her left ear with a little bit of bruising on the front of the earlobe. I've been cleaning it daily and putting antibiotic ointment on it... anything else I should be doing for a dogbite?

[spughy]

Oh, wow Jen. That's rough. I can't think of anything else you can do for the bites (assuming the dog has been vaccinated for rabies and such?) and I'm glad Ellie wasn't traumatized. It sounds like your friend's dog should probably not be around children, ever. Kids can be taught to watch for warning signals - low growls, moving away, showing teeth - but if the dog didn't display any of those before it snapped then it's definitely a danger to children. And, frankly, other people. My own dog is extremely tolerant and never escalates her behaviour past warning signals, but I am constantly surprised at how many people completely ignore those signals and keep doing things she doesn't like, like stroking her ears. She hates it, and she always moves her head away when strangers do it, and sometimes lifts her lip a bit, and people either don't notice or ignore it. I marvel that there are not *more* dog bite accidents in the world.

Anyway, I'm glad everyone's ok... and next time you have visitors with a dog, it might be an idea to ask that the dog not come. I know it seems wrong to *have* a dog and then not let other people bring theirs, but dogs behave differently - and incomprehensibly, to children - in the presence of other dogs and especially in different territory that is definitely not theirs.

First day of school tomorrow... I am dreading the moment of leaving Rowan in her classroom. I hope it goes ok.

[HoneyTree]

Yikes, Jen. I'm so glad Ellie is physically and psychologically OK. It sounds like it went as well as it possibly could have afterward.

[MelW]

I hope things get better for everyone soon.

And that the first day went well for Rowan!

Our school year hasn't had a very good start- a dead battery on the car this morning, Neela and Matt are sick, I have mastitis, and Nora doesn't want to nurse very much. Neela is pathetically sick- day three of fever, she has had no voice since yesterday, and is even declining my offers of ice cream for dinner/breakfast/lunch. Yesterday evening she fell asleep kneeling on the floor with her head on the couch. Matt started teaching again today, and Neela is supposed to start preschool tomorrow- but that would take an amazing recovery. I think it may be Friday or next week, instead. I'm eating cloves of raw garlic and begging Nora to nurse more and really hoping that I don't get sick, too.

[spughy]

Oh, Mel, that stinks. I hope everyone gets better soon.

Rowan had a GREAT first day at school - she bounced into her classroom, all eager to get her nametag and sticker and I actually called her back to give me a hug. I stayed outside the classroom (it was only an hour today) filling in the paperwork I was supposed to have done previously : and I heard her little piping voice in there frequently - it does carry! She came out thrilled with school "I didn't know it was going to be FUN!" and seems eager to go back tomorrow. Whew! Now she is passed out on the couch, since she didn't get enough sleep last night and in addition to all the excitement and stress about school, she spent the morning quite literally running around in circles and screaming with a little friend. If ever a kid earned a nap, she certainly did today!