Not getting PG, but don't want to wean...

[cndnveggie]

DS is about 28 months old, and nurses 3-5 times a day (usually upon waking, before and after nap, and to go to sleep, and maybe once at night, although he's STTN more often now too). I have no intentions to wean him, especially because that's how he falls asleep. And I enjoy our nursing relationship very much, especially now that he can ask for "nursies"

However, we've been TTCing for about 9 months, and we're still not PG. We got PG on the first try with DS, so it's taking longer than I anticipated. I know it's still not that long compared to some fertility problems, but I suspect it's because I'm breastfeeding. I'm quite sure that I'm ovulating, my cycles are regular (AF came back at about 9mo pp, and have been regular since), but I think my luteal phase might be a bit short (maybe 9-10 days?) I've tried taking Vitex and Vit B6 to help improve my fertility, but no luck with those either.

Anyways, I'm okay with it taking longer to get PG, because my first priority right now is nursing DS. However, I guess I just need some reassurances to keep me feeling that way - I don't want to start resenting nursing because it's leading to difficulty getting PG. Sometimes I think that it's better we'll have a larger age gap between kids, because DS still needs his "nursies" and parenting him is easier for now. But then I just get a bit sad that it's taking us so long to get PG with #2, especially since it seems like everyone else is getting PG now. All the PG announcements (or the whoops, we got PG while using BC, we got PG by accident, we got PG while nursing, etc) are making me a bit sad

Okay, thanks for letting me get that out - and any similar stories or words of wisdom would be appreciated!

[dachshundqueen]

Good morning.

Try progesterone cream if the upper doses of B6 aren't working. Emerita makes a very good one not full of stuff.

If you aren't charting, I would recommend that you do. I wake at 4am to temp and usually go back to sleep (not lately though) and repeated interruptions during the night have not caused my temps to be unstable.

Best,

Liz

[cndnveggie]

Thanks for the reply! I have heard about progesterone cream, but I'm a little nervous to try it. I guess part of me feels that my body isn't getting PG for a reason, and that I should just be patient and not mess with things. That if I do get PG, it will cause DS to wean earlier than he would have otherwise. I don't know, I'm still working out my feelings about it all.

And I have charted in the past (actually for 3 years prior to getting PG with DS), and charted a few cycles when we first started trying (which is why I'm pretty sure I'm ovulating and why I suspect my luteal phase is a bit short), but I just found it so hard with DS still waking during the night and sleeping in bed with us, and our wakeup hours are all over the place - I just found it hard to have any consistency. With that said, I had started trying to chart again this cycle, just to see if things look the same as earlier this year, but I keep forgetting to take my temp! Funny how I'm finding it hard to get back into that habit! Anyways, great advice, and I intend to chart

[Epona]

Originally Posted by cndnveggie

With that said, I had started trying to chart again this cycle, just to see if things look the same as earlier this year, but I keep forgetting to take my temp! Funny how I'm finding it hard to get back into that habit! Anyways, great advice, and I intend to chart

Me too! I failed last month, and am not off to a great start this month. Like it's so hard, right?

[RubySlippers]

I got pg after trying for just over a year while nursing 3 yr old ds. I found that charting wouldn't work for me (erratic wake-ups, etc.), and tried to follow my body's signs, which I generally know pretty well (esp. since I charted before ds was born). I got concerned after a while and decided to buy some ovulation test strips to confirm whether I was even ovulating, even though I had the signs and my cycle was like clockwork since about 6 mos pp with ds. I found out that I was a week off in predicting ovulation! I had all the signs about a week earlier, for some reason, than I actually ovulated. I finally got pg about 5 mos after figuring this out. Might be worth a try to check out some ovulation strips...

Good luck, I have been there!

[OTMomma]

I got pregnant easily with my first- but had a really difficult time concieving #2. My lueteal phase was short- and despite lots of different herbs and stuff, it didn't lengthen. I ended up choosing to nurse my dd until she and I were both ready to wean- when she was 39 months old. When we weaned, it was smooth and easy as dd and I were ready. I don't regret at all that I gave dd that time. My dd was a rather high strung needy child, so the big age gap I ended up with between #1 and #2 is good for our family. Even after weaning, my luteal phase still didn't lengthen like it should have, I ended up needing clomid to conceive my ds. There are 5 years between dd and ds. However, while still nursing ds, I conceieved dd2, a complete suprise after the struggle to have ds! So ds is now 26 months and tandem nursing with his one week old baby sis.

I'm not sure if my story is helpful- but I do know what you are going through. My advice is to parent the child you have in your arms to the best of your ability, and wait for the one in your heart.

[cndnveggie]

RubySlippers and OTMomma, thank you both for sharing your stories! They give me hope, and also reassure me that it's okay if it takes longer than I expected to get PG with #2.

I'm going to look into whether I should up my dose of Vit B6 and/or Vitex - and maybe also consider progesterone cream. I'm charting this cycle, so I hope it confirms that I'm ovulating and also confirms my suspicions that my luteal phase is too short. I think those are the only steps I'll take while DS is still nursing. Once he weans, if I still can't get PG, I'll go see an RE. I didn't realize you could use clomid for LPD, I thought it was only used if you weren't ovulating - so I learned something new today

OTMomma, I'm also glad you shared the story about your DD2 - a good reminder that I won't necessarily have a hard time getting PG the next time around! Quite good to know, because we only plan to have 2, and I guess I'd still better be safe and use BC!

[Carita]

if you find the nursing is the cause you shouldn't necessarily need to wean completely... maybe even nightweaning will help, or dropping 1 feed. Remember, it doesn't have to be all or nothing )

[mrsbrunette]

my dd doesnt really nurse that often in the middle of the night but im trying to night wean anyway. i have found that my luteal phase is short but each month it is getting longer since ive gotten on b6.

[cndnveggie]

Well, DS has gone about a week with no night waking (on his own) - his bottom two 2-year molars have cut through, so maybe that was affecting sleep? So he's been going from about 11pm to 7-8am with no nursing - nice! Anyways, we'll see what happens this cycle - fingers crossed!