or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Parenting › MIL purchased plastic toy - Wrong on so many levels!
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

MIL purchased plastic toy - Wrong on so many levels! - Page 3

post #41 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by KweenKrunch View Post
Third of all, we try to be ecologically sensitive in this household, and a chainsaw is not exactly our idea of a "green" toy - not only because it's made of plastic but because it represents deforestation and the destruction of non-renewable resources and loss of animal habitat.
I'm not quite sure why you are so upset that it is a chainsaw. Since you don't have plastic toys in your house I'm going to assume that you have wooden ones. Wood comes from trees that need to be felled by chainsaws. A chainsaw is a tool and it just depends on who uses it.
post #42 of 147
I completely understand the annoyance of toys that don't go along with your values
That said, I think you are overreacting.
A chain-saw is a tool. Tools can be used for good or bad.
And I know plenty of vegetarians who grill food and own bbq's.

Really not worth a confrontation, IMO.
post #43 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by BAU3 View Post
( I think most wooden toys come from......trees. I believe they are cut with chainsaws. Not being snarky.. it just struck me as kind of ironic).
Good point there.
post #44 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by zinemama View Post
I don't understand what you are objecting to. The woman who gave the toy is, in fact, the OP's MIL. To the OP, she's her in-law. Not a relative to her.

Is it the term "in-law" in general that you find annoying? You believe we should all refer to our ILs as "my child's grandparents?" Or what?

I also don't get how the OP referring to a gift from her MIL somehow implies that the child only belongs to his mother.

Could you clarify?

And for the record, I stand by my original statement. In-laws can be annoying.
My child's grandparents DOES have a much friendlier sound than "the in-laws", doesn't it? I might start using that.
post #45 of 147
Wow. This has become a complex, thought provoking thread! I've laughed a lot and want to thank tiffani for giving me some things to think about. I tend to be rigid when it comes to ds's toy gifts. But as I type, my farm living, Waldorf-loving ds is in the other room making chainsaw noises for his imaginary chainsaw ! We use one frequently on the farm to clear downed trees and to make his Waldorf-inspired toys! He would LOVE that toy.
To the op, if a toy gift doesn't appeal to our family I just say "Thank you, he'll love it" and then put it away or give it away. No sense alienating a close relative or friend over a piece of plastic. When they ask for suggestions I make sure to be as specific as possible about what works for us.
post #46 of 147
I agree with so much of what people are saying in this thread. Yes, you are overreacting. As someone else pointed out, I think flexibility is so important in parenting.
post #47 of 147
Yes, you are overreacting.
post #48 of 147
I keep thinking about this. It's bothering me.

What's wrong with a toy BBQ? Why would that be in comparison with a toy gun?

Even if you don't like to BBQ meat, people still cook veggies on a grill. I just can't think of why a toy BBQ would be so horrifying?
post #49 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepper44 View Post
I keep thinking about this. It's bothering me.

What's wrong with a toy BBQ? Why would that be in comparison with a toy gun?

Even if you don't like to BBQ meat, people still cook veggies on a grill. I just can't think of why a toy BBQ would be so horrifying?
I am also wondering this! I have to agree, however, that the toy is completely inappropriate for a 6 month old! LOL Did you return it?
post #50 of 147
I am pretty easily insulted by odd toys given to my kid, I mean I have gotten some real doozies. But I think that chainsaw is really freakin cool and if you'd like to give it away, we'd totally pay shipping for it LOL my 18 month old is obsessed with tools at the moment and would probably "work" on his car with it. Despite trying to have all wood toys, stuff like this makes its way into the toybox and now that he doesn't chew on them, I don't care too much esp. if they're second-third-fourthhand. I agree its a dumb toy for a 6 mos old but meh, other than that... I dont think it will give your babe deep psychological forest-devastating issues.
post #51 of 147
Lovely post, Tiffani (7:32am). LOL @ BAU (3:48pm).

Our electric chain saw is a rather essential tool for cutting down to size for the (eco-friendly) wood-burner all the hardwood we scavenged from an old barn knocked down near us last year.
post #52 of 147
yes, you're over-reacting. It was given out of love, even if you find it an odd toy. I can't imagine complaining about a GIFT. I mean, sure, a 6-month-old is unlikely to get much out of it, but maybe the grandparents were excited about it for whatever reason, and couldn't resist buying it now. I'm sure they thought it would bring the kid joy; sane people don't often buy things with irritating and annoying the child's parent in mind. Isn't it still the thought that counts?
post #53 of 147
I'd let DDs play with it without batteries.
post #54 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Drummer's Wife View Post
I'm sure they thought it would bring the kid joy; sane people don't often buy things with irritating and annoying the child's parent in mind. Isn't it still the thought that counts?
I beg to differ. LOL I've gotten some pretty erm... interesting gifts that were blatantly given to annoy me. But maybe they weren't sane... heh
post #55 of 147
I'm loving the response in this thread and kind of glad it wasn't just me who was saying... well, if the toy can't be plastic, and we can't cut up trees, are all the toys felt?

OP, I think what you're missing in your quest to save the world (which I admire) is LOVE. Was the toy given out of love? If so, it might be worth letting the rest go. If you don't want to own it, freecycle it.
post #56 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pepper44 View Post
What's wrong with a toy BBQ?
I think she was meaning it as a gender role toy. Which I could totally see happening. Anything that involves dolls or cleaning = girls. Anything that involves adventuring or intense action (chainsaw, etc) = for boys.
post #57 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grylliade View Post
I think she was meaning it as a gender role toy. Which I could totally see happening. Anything that involves dolls or cleaning = girls. Anything that involves adventuring or intense action (chainsaw, etc) = for boys.
I totally get what you mean, but the thought of equating BBQ with "intense action" made me laugh out loud. Just picturing my dad hanging with a beer on the back porch while BBQing, while the REALLY intense action was in the kitchen....
post #58 of 147
I have to say, I think you placing impossibly high standards on people who want to buy things for your children. Nothing with batteries, nothing with plastic, nothing that assumes a gender roll, nothing that could be interpreted in any way as being not "green."

It's confusing enough when you don't have small children to try and buy an age-appropriate toy, without all the rules and regulations pushed by the parents. Yes, he's your child and you can impose your rules on your child, but you can NOT impose your rules on someone (even your MIL) who is trying to buy your child a gift. At least not without coming off as being rude and ungrateful. Smile, say thank you, and move on. And if you decide to donate it, let me know, I'll send you my address. My 19mo would go CRAZY for that chainsaw!
post #59 of 147
Wow, over-reacting is an under-statement. It's a toy for goodness sake. It's not like they bought your ds a nuclear bomb.

If you don't like it, say thank you and donate it. There is no reason to be ungrateful or cause hurt feelings through a confrontation over a toy.
post #60 of 147
DS would love a toy like that- and he's only just over a year old. Heck, his grandparents have been giving him toy 'tools' since quite early on. His grandfather, in particular, is thoroughly enjoying that he seems to be a very stereotypical boyish boy. Personally, I'm just happy he's so loved. when something isn't age appropriate for him, I set it aside, they grow so fast that I know he'll be old enough for it soon enough.

Of course, if one of those had come into this house, his older sister would have pounced on it immediately.

I tend to think we overworry- as parents- about the effect a single toy will have in the grand scheme of a child's life. I can certainly attest that the toy vaccuum my daughter had when she was small has not forced her to become a miniature stepford wife.

If you think chainsaws are evil as a general rule- I suppose you could get rid of it, but it seems like a great chance to discuss how to use such tools responsibly. It isn't the chainsaws that are the key to deforestation, they are much too slow and inefficient when logging companies are using much more efficient machinery. Having grow up with wood heat, and having wood heat in our home as well, a chainsaw is a necessary tool. We teach our kids about which trees are good to harvest for wood, and about those we leave alone. We emphasize sustainability- and balance.

Ultimately though, I would want my kids to learn that relationships and people ar more important than a toy.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Parenting
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Parenting › MIL purchased plastic toy - Wrong on so many levels!