breastfeeding and relating to daddy

[evenstarlight]

I'm currently breastfeeding my two and a half year old. She isn't a super frequent feeder, and as my pregnancy is coming to an end, I find she feeds twice a day at the most....some days are exceptions, but other days she may only feed once.
I'm very happy to continue feeding over the next few years and haven't given it a whole lot of thought.
However, my husband has been struggling recently with dd prefering me to him. She loves him, plays with him, gets excited when he comes home from work....etc. however, she still needs me when she's upset, tired, hurt etc. At bedtime, she only wants me to read to her, and she will often refuse to kiss daddy goodbye, or goodnight etc.
I've told him over and over again that it's normal, and that she loves him and needs him, she just doesn't always express it in a way he can relate to...but it really gets him down sometimes.
Last night he said that he wonders if it's because I'm still breastfeeding that she preferes me....and he was wondering if any research had gone into the effects of long (full) term breastfeeding and the effects it has on children's relationships to their fathers....
He tried googling and came up with nothing. I'm a bit annoyed now that he's going to hold on to this theory and i'm going to feel pressured to wean DD. Honestly, I think it's just personalities. I know she adores him, and I think sometimes he is a bit oversensitive and often expects her to respond in a certain way on his terms....he just isn't as in tune with her due to not spending as much time with her...but I really don't think it's the breastfeeding.

Any thoughts??

[PatioGardener]

IMO, it's a normal phase, and if you were to wean you'd be dealing with the same issues, but you'd have lost a tool to comfort and connect with your child.

[averlee]

I have heard that breastfeeding strengthens the child's relationships not just with the mom, but with everyone. Because it provides such a solid foundation of love, security, and healthy intimacy, which as the child grows, extends and applies to their relationships with not just the mother, but father, grandparents, siblings, and eventually romantic partners, and your grandkids someday.

[alegna]

Originally Posted by PatioGardener

IMO, it's a normal phase, and if you were to wean you'd be dealing with the same issues, but you'd have lost a tool to comfort and connect with your child.

:

My dd is 5 and still nursing and both of my kids adore their daddy. When they hear his key in the lock in the evenings they both drop what they're doing and run to the door shouting Daddy!

-Angela

[pbjmama]

Children go through phases of parent preference regardless of nursing, not nursing or other. My guess is that it is compounded by the impending sibling.

[mamazee]

Kids I've known go through this regardless of whether they nurse. It isn't related to nursing. It's just the age. She'll outgrow it.