|He was a HORRIBLE sleeper and within a week or so was just a bad sleeper.|
OP- We take a slightly different approach but it has worked beautifully for us both times. (in my opinion, a whole lot of crying/screaming means that the LO isn't ready to be pushed that far yet)
Our process takes a long time and involves a little resistance, but hasn't been too bad at all. I'm going to say the short version... First, we work on getting the LO to go to sleep at bedtime without nursing all the way to sleep. There a bunch of different, gentler ways to do this. It was different with both of my babies based on personality. With my DS, more recently, I nursed him almost to sleep and then put him in the crib (in our room). When he stood up and cried, I picked him up and either nursed him to sleep or bounced him a little in my arms until he relaxed and got drowsy again, then put him back down. REPEAT as long as it takes until he went to sleep. It was a long process but didn't involve much crying. Dh and I could take turns putting him down, after the nursing of course
Once he was good at going to sleep in the crib, we started sending dh in to put him BACK to sleep at his first nightwaking. This was usually before we even went to bed. Sometimes dh would get him back to sleep in the crib, sometimes in the family bed, but the point is that it was without having to nurse back to sleep. After we were in bed, I nursed DS whenever he would wake up (in the family bed).
That went on for a couple of months. When he was 16 months, we decided to start nightweaning. I basically did Gordon's plan with the nursing only for a few minutes and then insisting that ds go back to sleep w/out it. Since he was already used to going TO sleep and sometimes back to sleep w/out nursing, it wasn't too bad. He wasn't thrilled. He fussed and rolled around like, "What the heck? Nurse me more!" but once he got the message that the "rules had changed" (per Dr. Gordon's article), he went back to sleep. Within a week, he started sleeping from 8pm-5am in his crib before coming into the family bed!!
With DD (now 3) Dh did her nightweaning while I moved out of the room. She was more accepting of comfort from dh. With DS, he was devastated to be removed completely from me, so I did his nightweaning.
DS started sleeping SO much better when nightweaned. DD didn't really, so it wasn't as beneficial. The benefit was that dh and I could take turns comforting her since it didn't always have to be nursing.