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Feel like yelling at your child? Yell at this thread instead! - Page 4

post #61 of 1059
JUST...SHUT... *UP*!
post #62 of 1059
JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! I JUST WANT 5 FREAKING MINUTES ALONE! NO YOU CANNOT COME WITH ME TO THE BATHROOM. DON'T KNOCK THE BABY GATE DOWN, I SAID DON'T KNOCK THE BABY GATE DOWN, HELLOOOOOOOOO? ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME??? LEAVE THE FRICKEN BABY GATE ALONE??? GO AWAY I AM ON THE PHONE! FOR THE FIRST TIME TODAY I AM TALKING TO AN ADULT FOR 5 FREAKING MINUTES GO AWAY!! I DON'T CARE THAT YOUR DINOSAUR IS TALKING TO ME!!! NO YOU CANNOT TALK, I HAVEN'T EVEN TALKED YET! DON'T HIT YOUR SISTER, I SAID DON'T HIT YOUR SISTER. WHAT DO YOU MEAN I SAID YOU COULD? I DID NOT SAY YOU COULD!! GO TO SLEEP, I MEAN IT ELIJAH GO TO SLEEP!!! STOP QUACKING AND GO TO SLEEP! YES I KNOW A DUCK QUACKS GO TO SLEEP!!! NO YOU DO NOT NEED TO GO TO THE BATHROOM YOU JUST WENT 3 MINUTES AGO. YES YOU DID! OLIVIA IT IS 5 IN THE MORNING, IT IS NOT TIME TO GET UP. NO IT ISN'T! PLEASE JUST GO BACK TO SLEEP! PLLLEEEEEASSSSEEEE! MOMMY IS SO TIRED!! JUST GO BACK TO SLEEP!! I'M SERIOUS KID 5 AM IS NOT MORNING, LOOK ITS DARK OUTSIDE. I AM SO TIRED WILL YOU BOTH JUST LEAVE ME ALONE FOR 5 SECONDS!!! AARRRRGGHHHHHH!!@$*@!!?$^&
post #63 of 1059
Okay Look. I Know That You Three Are In Diapers...no A. I Am Not Talking To You...but See, Can You Just, For One Day Synchronize Your Poopin?

I Know She Gave You That Present But It Is Ugly And Plastic And Makes Too Much Noise....

I Know She Ate The Crayon...
post #64 of 1059
WHAT DO YOU WANT?? FOR G*D's SAKE, WHAAATT do you WAAANT??? STOP ROOTING AND ROOTING AND ROOTING VIOLENTLY AT MY NIPPLE AND THEN LATCHING ON AND IMMEDIATELY SPITTING OR YANKING HARD A COUPLE OF TIMES AND THEN LETTING GO AND ROOTING WILDLY AT MY ARMPIT, MY NECK, MY BREAST, MY NIPPLE, BUT NOT LATCHING ON. AND THEN WHEN YOU DO LATCH ON AND ALLLLLLLMOST FALL ASLEEP YOU NIBBLE AND NIBBLE AND NIBBLE UNTIL I FEEL LIKE I'M GOING TO CLIMB THE WALLS AND I HAVE TO CLUTCH THE COVERS IN IRRITATION. BUT IF I FREE MYSELF DO YOU STAY ASLEEP? NOOOOOOOOOOO AAAAAAAAAAAGH! AND MUST YOU ONLY LIKE TO BE CARRIED OVER MY SHOULDER IN SUCH A WAY THAT I HAVE TO CRICK MY BODY OVER TO THE SIDE TO KEEP YOU THERE AND MY BACK FEELS LIKE IT'S GOING TO BREAK OFF. CAN'T YOU PLEASE LIKE TO BE CARRIED LIKE A NORMAL BABY? SO THAT i CAN SEE YOUR FACE AND GET SOME KIND OF PLEASURE FROM HOLDING YOU??? NOOOOOOOOOO

CAN I CRY TOO? WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!

*whew*
post #65 of 1059
DON`T FART ON ME, HONEY. PLEASE DON`T FART IN MY FACE! DON`T FART ON ME, I SAID!!!

I AM GOING TO KILL YOUR UNCLE FOR TEACHING YOU THAT!!!!


STOP FRIGGING FARTING IN MY FACE!!!!

EWWWW, YOU STINK!
post #66 of 1059
This is too funny! Here are a couple of my contributions....

If you must nurse while I am on the computer please stop smacking the keyboard and %#$ing everything up!

Why am I not allowed to go to the bathroom alone? Why must you come and check on me every 2 seconds? Why can I not read one page of People magazine on the toilet without answering a million questions?!?!

No you may not have Coke for breakfast...or M&M's.

Please go put on your jammies. Please pick out a book for bed. PLEASE GO PUT ON YOUR JAMMIES. PLEASE PICK OUT A BOOK FOR BED! PLEASE DO IT NOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!

Please STOP TORTURING YOUR SISTERS!!!!!!!!

Please FOR THE LOVE OF GOD let me sleep at least one 2 hour stretch tonight without either of you waking to nurse.

Please let me read my emails.

Fun! I'm sure I have a million more!
post #67 of 1059
For the last time, THERE IS NO MORE "HAPPY DAY CAKE"!!!!!!
post #68 of 1059
Actual conversation held at my house last night:

JUST GOOOO TTTTOOOO SLLEEEEPPP. I'M OUT OF SONGS, MY ARMS ARE TIRED AND MY DINNER IS COLD.

You know you are in trouble when you try to reason with a 12 month old. Someone, anyone, please reassure me that he will one day sleep for more than an hour - and I won't be F***ing 93 when it happens!!!!!!
post #69 of 1059
QUIT CLIMBING UP ON THE COUNTERS! JUST GET DOWN! STOP IT NOW! LEAVE THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER ALONE! DON'T BEND MY WHISK LIKE THAT! GET DOWN! GET DOWN! GET DOWN!
post #70 of 1059
girls,pleeze go to sleep

go to sleep

GO TO SLEEEEPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It is 12:30 AGAIN I am not up to another night of a 4 am play date in this house!

Please let this mama sleep.
post #71 of 1059
I DON'T KNOW..OK..I JUST DON'T HAVE THE ANSWERS T O EVERY DARN QUESTION YOU ASK.I JUST DON'T.

BECUASE I SAID SO!!!!!!!!!

LEAVE THE BABY ALONE IF SHE IS ASLEEP!

I WANT TO PEE ALONE ..I DON'T NEED YOU TO HELP ME WIPE MY BUM AND I DON'T WANT YOU TO KEEP ME COMPANY.

NO YOU CANNOT JUST EAT YOGURT .

DO NOT TOUCH THAT!! NO I DON'T NEED YOU TO HELP ME COOK..I NEED YOU TO GET AWAY FROM THE HOT STOVE.

WILL THE 2 OF YOU QUIT PUSHIN ME OFF THE BED??????


DO NOT SPIT WATER IN YOUR SISTERS FACE..NO DON'T SQUIRT ME EITHER!


PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE WHILE I GO POTTY. PLEASE. I DON'T ASK FOR MUCH..JUST THE CHANCE TO POOP WITH OUT YOU COMBING ON MY LEGS AT THE SAME TIME..


NO MORE DRAGON TAILS..PLEEEZZEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There, i feel much better. off to hug my kids....



post #72 of 1059
I saw this thread yesterday and today I feeling like adding to it.

WHY CAN'T YOU STOP YELLING WHILE YOUR SISTER TAKES A NAP? wHY CAN'T YOU EAT YOUR LUNCH? wHY DO YOU HAVE TO ASK ME FOR EVERY SINGLE THING YOU SEE? LOOK, NOW YOU WOKE UP YOUR SISTER!!! i WANT TO EAT LUNCH TOO!!

Okay that feels better.
post #73 of 1059
Thread Starter 
I WISH THE GYPSIES WOULD TAKE YOU AWAY LIKE SHEL SILVERSTEIN SAYS. I AM SICK OF THIS CRAP. YOU LITTLE PIPSQUEAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I WANT TO GO AWAY AND NEVER COME HOME
WHY CAN'T YOU LET ME CLEAN?
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE YOUR SISTER CRY AND WAKE HER UP? WHY CAN'T YOU BEHAVE FOR MORE THAN 2SECONDS? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO GET UP EVERY NIGHT AND COME INTO OUR ROOM AND WHINE FOR DADDY? WHY CANT I GET SOME F$@^%$^# SLEEP?
post #74 of 1059
Thanks for this thread! I CAN'T THINK OF ANY MORE STORIES. OK..ONE MORE....ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A BEAR AND GIRAFFE AND THEY WERE GOING FOR A WALK..OK THEN THEY WERE AT THE PARK AND THEY WERE ON THE SWINGS..WHY CAN'T YOU JUST MAKE UP THE STINKING STORY IF YOU HATE ALL THE ONES I MAKE? WHY CAN'T WE JUST READ BOOKS ONCE IN A WHILE? IF I WAS SO GREAT AT MAKING UP STORIES I WOULD BE A DAMN CHILDREN'S BOOK AUTHOR AND THEN I'D HAVE SOME STINKING MONEY AND WE COULD MOVE OUT OF THIS FREAKIN HELL HOLE HOUSE THAT YOUR STUPID FATHER IS TOO LAZY TO FIX. NO MORE CAILLOU I CAN'T TAKE THAT WHINING LITTLE FREAK ANYMORE..WHY DON'T HIS PARENTS TELL HIM TO SHUT UP..ROSIE IS MORE MATURE THAN HIM NO MORE PLAYING IN WATER..NO..LEAVE THE CAT ALONE...COME GET CHANGED..NOW..NOT UNDER THE TABLE...BE QUIET..DADDY AND NANA ARE SLEEPING..STTOOOO[PPPPP IIIITTTT
post #75 of 1059
Quote:
NO MORE CAILLOU I CAN'T TAKE THAT WHINING LITTLE FREAK ANYMORE..

Amen to that! :LOL :LOL :LOL
post #76 of 1059
Thread Starter 
I third the Calliou thing...why is he bald, anyhow???
post #77 of 1059
BECAUSE I SAID SO!!!!!

PKAY, FROM NOW ON YOU GET 5 WHYS A DAY. THAT'S IT. NO MORE.

I'M NOT TALKING ANYMORE. I AM NOT ANSWERING THAT. I DON'T KNOW WHY. JUST BECAUSE. DIDN'T YOU HEAR ME I AM NOT TALKING FOR 5 MINUTES. IT'S BEEN 5 SECONDS, NO YOU CAN'T ASK ANOTHER QUESTION.
post #78 of 1059
WOW!! I have 2 in one day.

CAN YOU PLEASE PLAY WITH YOUR SISTER??!! MOMMY NEEDS SOME ALONE TIME NOW. ALL I ASK IS THAT I GET TO EAY LUNCH QUIETLY AND THAT I GET 10 MINUTES TO MYSELF ON THE COMPUTER WITHOUT YOU UP MY A**!! YOUR SISTER IS SITTING AT THE DESK COLORING, WHY CANT YOU SIT WITH HER? DO YOU HAVE TO BRING THE COLORING BOOK IN HERE AND THE CHAIR? WHY CANT YOU JUST COLOR AT THE TABLE WITH YOUR SISTER? MOMMY REALLY NEEDS A MINUTE TO HERSELF!!!
post #79 of 1059
LEAVE ME ALONE, STOP WHINING, STOP PICKING AND SCRATCHING MY SKIN WHILE YOU NURSE.

good for now...
post #80 of 1059
From bedtime, tonight (plus lots of PMS):

For the love of all that is good, JUST PICK A POSITION AND LAY STILL!!!!!! STOP ROLLING AROUND, KICKING OFF THE COVERS, AND THEN ASKING FOR THEN ASKING FOR THE COVERS AGAIN!!!! STOP FLIPPING YOUR HAIR IN MY FACE!!!!!! AND WOULD YOU PLEASE STOP FLOPPING YOUR HEAD ONTO THE PILLOW BECAUSE YOU ARE GOING TO--OUCH!!!!!!--yep....nail me right on the bridge of my nose with your huge, hard head
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