I think God is trying to send me a message

[Learning_Mum]

In the last two weeks, on two separate trips to the library I picked up two different books that dealt with women finding God. I didn't know either of these books had anything to do with religion, in fact I thought one was a murder mystery and one was a historical novel.

I feel like I need to listen to this message, but I don't know what I do now. Technically I'm a Christian. I've never gone to church. I don't know that I believe Jesus was the son of God. I believe there was a really great guy called Jesus but I believe that God is God.

I'm scared too. I don't know anyone who is religious, and honestly, probably everyone I know scoffs at religion. I think I'm embarrassed to admit that I feel like God is calling to me.

[genifer]

That is awesome. I had the same thing happen to me about 11 years ago. I did come to Know Jesus Christ as God, Saviour, and all the hated things about christianity, or misunderstood things I should say. I even had a woman at one point tell me that I needed to know Jesus. I didnt think much about it at the time but about 9 months later I did commit my life to Jesus Christ and ...well Ive been on that road ever since.

Keep listening. Keep your mind open to God leading you and calling you.

[Bluegoat]

When I was younger, I thought the same thing. It seemed like most people around me didn't take religion very seriously. It wasn't something for people who had an education, as far as I could tell.

Well, I had a bit of a surprise when I went of to university. There were lots of people there with doctorates and master's degrees who were either religious or took it seriously on an intellectual level.

Aside from the stuff I was reading for school, I also discovered people like GK Chesterton, CS Lewis, Dorothy Sayers. All of whom were university educated Christians, Lewis was a professor at Cambridge, and they knew a lot about religion and philosophy.

The conclusion I had to come to was whether I became religious or not, was that casually dismissing religion as something silly or not intellectual was a result of MY bad education.

It is weird though when you start looking at religion and all the people around you have this attitude. Although you may find that some actually don't and you just didn't notice them before. But you don't need to advertise what you are doing right away - it can be a private project for a while, until you feel more sure of yourself.

I'm not sure what your religious background is, but besides your library finds I would recommend anything by the people I mentioned, especially CS Lewis' books Surprised by Joy or Mere Christianity. Surprised By Joy is an autobiography, and tells about he became a Christian from being an atheist, and is very enjoyable just as a story of an interesting person's life.

[kangamitroo]

I am excited for you. even if it feels strange and scary, I hope you can remain open to possibilities. Listening, and noticing what makes sense to your heart.

Of my oldest/closest friends, I am the only one interested in religion, and I fought my need for a spiritual life for a long time. Now, I am open and seeking (and not always entirely sure where I'll end up, but I have a firmer sense of my beliefs).

explore and get to know yourself better in this way. as one place to explore, there are many wonderful spiritual autobiographies--journeys of people coming to figure out what they believe. I am not a christian, but really enjoyed Things Seen and Unseen by Nora Gallagher, an episcopal woman, and Breathing Space by Heidi Neumark (a minister in the Bronx).

also, i have been very very grateful for MDC as i explore and seek answers. feel free to ask the mamas here! speaking for myself, i love these conversations agout God. peace be with you on your journey.

[springmama]

That is great! I am very happy for you. I just said a little prayer for you too. Trust that God will lead you where you are meant to be. I was an agnostic for years and ignored God's call to come back to the faith for way over a year until I realized that NO LONGER could I stay away from Him. He really does work in mysterious ways. Take it slow and just enjoy this time of exploration. Read, pray and visit different churches.

And I agree with the pp who said that you can keep it private for now. I have chosen to tell my family that I have returned to my faith in God but for now I am not telling them that I am converting to Catholicism, and my dh and his family are really skeptical of all religion so I don't talk much about it with them. I have a couple of people in RL but mostly i just get support from God and from other mamas here on MDC. PM me any time if you want.

[greenmagick]

I hope this doesnt come across wrong, but if you feel a call to God, but dont feel Jesus is God, there are plenty of other religions that share this belief. Dont limit yourself to christianity if it doesnt fit. Not saying it doesnt, but often for some reason people equate religious with christianity and dont look further.

[Learning_Mum]

That's for your support guys! And for the book recs. I'll have to see if I can find them and start researching!

SpringMama - Thank you for your prayer! Usually someone saying that prayed for me would creep me out a little bit, but when I read your post I got a lovely warm fuzzy feeling.

GreenMagick - I have always been drawn to Judaism to be honest, right from a small child. I know there is a Reform Synagogue not too far away, so I might go for a visit.

I've told DH and I think he thinks it's a bit hokey. But I think so long as I don't drag him along to Church he'll be fine! Right now I guess I'm just trying to pray and be open to hearing Gods voice. I kind of feel like if I concentrate I can open myself up, but find that when I'm going through the day I shut myself off again.

[kblackstone444]

If God is calling you, then for goodness sake, listen, see what he wants!

[hrsmom]

That's so cool!!! : I agree, it can be a private journey for as long as you want it to be. And there are lots of interesting threads here, for lurking and for posting in! I've found that quite a few people do scoff at religion, but are very interested in God and spiritual matters, too.

[Learning_Mum]

If God is calling you, then for goodness sake, listen, see what he wants!

Simple, but pretty good advice!

It seems silly to even think about not listening when you put it that way!

[mamabadger]

In my church, the first thing someone would be told in a situation like that, is to be very, very cautious, and not assume any "message" you receive is from God. People can be badly, even dangerously, misled.

The second thing: ask God to make his message clear. Ask frequently throughout the day. Wait patiently for an answer.

[FondestBianca]

God can be calling to you without calling you to Christianity. God can lead you down many paths, try not to pre-determine the path without using your internal compass. You said that you don't really believe that Jesus was the son of God (meaning that you believe Joseph was his bio father I assume), and there is no reason that if that just doesn't jive with you internally you should force yourself to believe it. That does not need to be a factor in your relationship with God. Most would argue with me there but, I'll disagree every time

Enjoy your adventure, have fun, and go about it with excitement rather than getting hung up on the details. Talk to God, tell him how you feel, ask questions.

[EnviroBecca]

: You are about to discover something wonderful!

You might like this article, Finding God in 5 Steps, with practical advice from someone who was a strident atheist and is now a very intelligent Christian.

[transformed]

I'd trust that. It's an awakening. There are many many paths to god - trust the path that he wishes to take you on.

Just so you know - it's happening all over the planet right now.

It happened to me 5 years ago. Out of nowhere.

PM if you'd like to chat.

[AbigailGrace]

Originally Posted by transformed

Just so you know - it's happening all over the planet right now.

I agree with this! So good to hear so many wishing you well, too. I prayed that you will find the path God wants 'you' to take, which may look different from anything you thought it might look like.