Continuation

[FatherTryingToHelp]

Still don't know what to do or where to go..

Things have "improved" over the past couple of weeks, srt of, some things are better, some are worse. So the wife has gone up quite a bit on the drugs the past week or so, last three days gone up each day on the Seroquel, although last night seemed to make her nauseous/dizzy feeling, not sure if it was the drug, or something else, every day seems to bring new "bad feelings" to worry about, obsess over, and push her firmly into the "I'm never going to get better" camp.

While it was the wierd shaky feelings in the morning that were (by her description) the most worrisome, now of course they seem to have gone a bit, but she felt some other dizziness, shaky feeling during the day, so is now worried about that. Some days I really feel having her goto Hospital might be for the best, and I'm being selfish, because some days I really feel like I want a break.

I know there is precious little I can do, the problem with this illness seems to be that trying to concentrate on any activity is, next to impossible, which means that actually getting focus on anything (other than being ill) doesn't seem to happen. It's so hard for her, and me and I just don't know what I can do to help, really don't know where to go.

Any advice?

[mom0810]

I don't think you are being selfish to think of putting her in the hospital at all. I think you know her best and you can see that is what she really needs right now. I think you are resisting because you feel some sort of guilt about that, but you shouldn't. I think the 24 hour observation she would get in the hospital would be extremely beneficial.

You haven't really answered my question about therapists. Does she still have one? What happened with that? A psychiatrist is great, but only really helps with med mgmt. She should have a therapist she sees weekly at the very least... bi-weekly would be even better. That is the person that is going to help her deal with the feelings she is having and learn how to get through them. Did something happen with Shoshanna that she decided not to see her anymore? It's totally normal to try MANY therapists before finding the right one. I think I saw... 4 or 5 before finding my current therapist, and I saw at least that many pdocs before I got a good one to manage my meds at the time.

This WILL pass. I know it doesn't seem like it now, but she has only been on the higher doses of meds for a short time, and they take time to work.

There are some authors I would love for you to look up when you have a chance. Dr. Daniel Amen is one, he talks about lots of different disorders and meds in his books. I think any book you can find on bipolar and the meds it requires and of therapies for that will help you so much in this journey. It will help you understand her, and it will help her see that she is not alone, there is hope, and things will get better.

I am thinking of you guys often. Please keep updating.

[mysticmomma]

Has she been tested for lyme disease and other tick borne illnesses?

[mom0810]

Hi,

I was also wondering if anyone had talked to you about her having PTSD. PTSD also often occurs with Bipolar, and perhaps, if she had a traumatic childbirth, this could have triggered PTSD along with Bipolar.

I just think there is more going on here and that she needs more specialized care. It sounds like more than you can handle at home, and you need not feel apologetic for that.

[jspring0308]

I've been following your story and feel very strongly that your wife really needs to be hospitalized for a few days. I know there is a lot of negative stigma surrounding psyche wards but from experience it can have really positive outcomes. The toll this is taking on all of you is much more devastating then being admitted to a psyche unit at a hospital. Your wife will sleep, her meds will be figured out, she'll have individual counseling and probably group counseling and they'll help figure out what to next. And you and your child will get a small break from the relentless responsibility of care-taking which I know you are doing out of love but is hard on you and your child.

I got better because of my 1st child, she was the reason I was willing to get better and it was hard but worth all the time, energy and money. But your wife might not be able to make those decisions so they might need to be made by you. Best of luck. I really hope things start looking up soon for the mental health of you all!

[Autumn Breeze]

I would tend to agree with mom0810 on the possible PTSD, what was her labor and birth like? What about the childs first few days or weeks?

And I also agree with the hospitalization route, it's just out of your scope, you love her but you can't watch her hurt, and there isn't anything you can really do now to help her other than love her.