night weaning...

[nelson]

DS is 16 months and honestly has never woken up less than 5 times a night to nurse. We cosleep and up until he turned about 12 mnths I really didn't mind, now I do. I just can't sleep through it like I used to, it is really making me miserable. I don't even know where to begin. He has only ever fallen back asleep with my boob in his mouth, I have tried a couple of times to sing to him, rub his back, rock him or try to tell him that "milk is sleeping" but he just starts crying and waking himself up more than he already was. I have never let it get further than that without sleepily putting my boob back in his mouth. I have also tried putting him him on a mattress next to the bed so he wasn't sleeping right next to me, thinking that maybe he was waking up to nurse because I was right there, he actually ended up waking up even more. Any suggestions would be appreciated. I wasn't sure exactly were to post this, but thought I would try here first.

[gillibean]

What worked for us was having me sleep in another room for a few nights and DD staying in the bed with only DH. When she woke up, DH would rub her back and help her get back to sleep. The first night was pretty rough, the second night was not nearly as bad, the third night was decent and she hardly even woke up on the fourth night. I was stunned at how quickly she seemed to deal with it. She went from waking up 3-4 times a night and needing to nurse to get back to sleep to hardly waking up at all - we all got a better sleep. My only regret is that we waited till she was almost 2 to do it.

Yes, the first night was really rough but I knew that she was in good hands with DH and that she wanted to nurse out of habit rather than actually *needing* the nourishment. It was also starting to really wear on me because when I'd try to unlatch her at night she'd complain. I felt like I was nursing the whole. night. long!!!! My back was getting so sore and I needed sleep and she needed sleep too - something had to give.

[etsdtm99]

that sounds exactly like my DD .. we tried night weaning at 10/13/15 months and it was pointless.. i didn't even really try because she got so worked up.. but at 18/19 months i tried again, it was different, she obviously understood that the milk was sleeping, she knew what i meant when i told her to go to sleep .. she was MAD .. she screamed into a pillow and threw a fit the first night, but she was obviously angry and not confused/scared/hungry etc. .. it did not last more than a few mins and she quieted and went to sleep (with comforting/backrubbing etc but no nursing and no getting out of bed to rock etc) after just a few nights she was sleeping through the night .. i think it working had as much to do with my being totally 100% sure that it had to happen as it did with her understanding what i meant..

i am planning to do the same with DS when he seems ready.. he is 16 months now and i still believe he is waking out of hunger and he doesn't wake as often as DD did.. only 2-3 times per night unless he is teething. oh, and i'm also waiting for alllll the teeth to be in (except 2 yr molars) i think that helped with DD too.. she had all her teeth.

[nelson]

Thanks for the responses ladies. I was planning on waiting a couple of months longer, like you said, I think sometimes he nurses more while teething, and I should probably wait till the big ones are through. I also like the idea of letting DH stay in the room with him, DS knows that there is no milk with Daddy and seems ok with it, whereas if I am there telling him "no milk" he just gets upset.

[spirit4ever]

I would love to nightwean dd who is almost 14 months but i know that she is not ready, all my kids get really sick during the winter months, so between that and teething I will hold off for as long as I can!!!!!!!!

[mom61508]

I know exactly how you feel not sleeping! I contemplated NW for about a month and finally last week I put into action. I used jay gorrdons technique but tweaked it a little bit.
The first 4 nights between 11 and 6 I would let DD nurse but only for 5-10 minutes or before she fell asleep I would take the breast away and tell her all done you go night night. I did the same thing each night. She caught on very quickly to this. Then the 5th night she woke up twice to nurse but it was a battle. first time she cried for over a hour...I gave in and nursed her but she rolled over herself after 5 minutes and went to sleep. Same thing the 2 waking.
The next 4 nights have been a breeze! She has slept from 10-6 with waking once and I tell her to go night night and cuddle next to her and she's out like a light: Last night I actually had to wake her up to nurse at 545 because I felt like my boob was gonna burst and it was to uncomfortable to sleep thru. She nursed for 5 minutes then went back to sleep till 8.
I hope that gives you some ideas. I think gradually setting boundaries works . I know it's hard and I NEVER in a million years that DD would be so easy!
Good luck to you!
OH ya DD is 15 months in case you were wondering

[HempyHippyMama]

We are about to start night 3 of night weaning. My dd is two and she was waking every 2 hours to nurse! I hope that in ten days when I go back to school we will have had at least one good nights sleep. Good luck to all you other nw mamas out there. I will be checking back for tips and support.
cheers

[puremama88]

Thanks to Mom61508

I just have to say thanks to you for your post. I am a single mom so I don't have the option to have my daughter's father sleep with her to help night weaning. This gradual approach sounds like something my daughter and I can work on together.

Most of the time her nursing at night is fine with me, its just once or twice, but the last two nights she has been nursing all night. She is 19months and she was having trouble sleeping because of a cold. I understand that its a special circumstance but I really need sleep. I kept telling her to go to sleep and she could nurse again in the morning but that just made her cry. If I let her nurse for a little bit then broke the seal she would cry. Sometimes she would fall asleep only to wake again and start crying. We had a rough night!

I am also going to look for the author you suggested. Anyone else have any book suggestions?

Thanks!