I was wondering how your healing process went after being diagnosed? Was it mostly an improvement or did you hit some more holes in the months that followed?
Some background: Shortly after a traumatic birth in May, I was diagnosed with severe PPD. I had completely lost it: crying all day, constant thoughts of self-harm, guilt about being a bad mother, etc. So, I was prescribed Zoloft and started therapy. After about 6 weeks, I was feeling a lot better, but not quite right, and there were still some thoughts of self-harm, so my dose was upped to 100mg. After that, for the rest of the summer, I was feeling quite well, and my life seemed awesome and I enjoyed spending time with my baby.
However, for the last week or so, I've been feeling worse once again. I've started going back to work at the beginning of September, and since then I've felt overwhelmed and less able to cope. I've also been having more negative thoughts concerning myself, worry a lot, and I'm often not quite willing to engage with the baby. He's sleeping worse than before, and because I'm nursing him several times during the night and we're cosleeping for part of the night, I am often very tired and exhausted. Also, because of the demands of my job (I teach college, and despite a load reduction this semester, still work around 40 hours a week), I have stopped exercising, which is probably not helping either. Not sure what is going on? Am I relapsing into PPD? Should I try to get my medication adjusted? Should I try to plan/organize my day even more thoroughly?
Some background: Shortly after a traumatic birth in May, I was diagnosed with severe PPD. I had completely lost it: crying all day, constant thoughts of self-harm, guilt about being a bad mother, etc. So, I was prescribed Zoloft and started therapy. After about 6 weeks, I was feeling a lot better, but not quite right, and there were still some thoughts of self-harm, so my dose was upped to 100mg. After that, for the rest of the summer, I was feeling quite well, and my life seemed awesome and I enjoyed spending time with my baby.
However, for the last week or so, I've been feeling worse once again. I've started going back to work at the beginning of September, and since then I've felt overwhelmed and less able to cope. I've also been having more negative thoughts concerning myself, worry a lot, and I'm often not quite willing to engage with the baby. He's sleeping worse than before, and because I'm nursing him several times during the night and we're cosleeping for part of the night, I am often very tired and exhausted. Also, because of the demands of my job (I teach college, and despite a load reduction this semester, still work around 40 hours a week), I have stopped exercising, which is probably not helping either. Not sure what is going on? Am I relapsing into PPD? Should I try to get my medication adjusted? Should I try to plan/organize my day even more thoroughly?
I have not had it severe and not diagnosed by doc with PPD but I still have my down days, like yesterday or last week when I went on a rant on our DDC. I'm well most days but I struggle here and there. I havn't been doin therapy, probably a bad idea...what about you?
I'm not mothering her very well these days. To others it wouldn't look like it but i know how i used to be with her. I tried homeschoolin a few weeks ago and stressed myself out, I think that's part of why I've crashed...the world puts so many pressures on moms that I think I have to be doin more than just takin care of my the kids needs.
