"My son should look like me"

[Toolip]

My friend just told me the story of when she just had her first son. She is fairly mainstream and I had always been curious if her boys were intact but we had never talked about it. She told me that she learned how awful it was and did not want it to happen to her son but they (she and her husband) fought through the whole pregnancy and after their oldest boy was born, they were still fighting in the delivery room.

Her husbands main argument was that he wanted the boys to look like him. She asked if he cared whether or not he looked like his dad and he said that it was very important to him that he had looked like his dad and he wanted that for his sons as well.

She said that she couldn't keep fighting and said, "fine, you decide, but you have to do some research." (I know this tactic isn't very popular around here and I cringed a little when she said it but she assured me that the story had a happy ending)

So, he did go and do some research and he talked to his dad and found out that his dad was actually INTACT! He humbly went back to his wife (my friend) and said that it must not have been as important to him as he had thought and that his sons would remain intact

Just thought that you might enjoy the happy ending

[Fay]

How wonderful that the little boy looks like Grandpa -- no cosmetic surgery necessary!

[Chloe'sMama]

That is so awesome. A bit surprised that he told the truth though....

[Toolip]

Originally Posted by Chloe'sMama

That is so awesome. A bit surprised that he told the truth though....

You know, he really believed that it mattered to him though. He wasn't just in it for the argument. He is a good guy and his sons are lucky to have him

[Fellow Traveler]

Originally Posted by Toolip

You know, he really believed that it mattered to him though. He wasn't just in it for the argument. He is a good guy and his sons are lucky to have him

You should see the Penn video a bit further down.

[Toolip]

Originally Posted by Fellow Traveler

You should see the Penn video a bit further down.

I have seen it How does it relate to what I said though? Are you referring to a particular part? Maybe I should watch it again

[Fellow Traveler]

The Penn "He should look like dad video clip". Even though your friend made the right decision, they might enjoy that perspective, KWIM?

[lawmama1984]

I wonder if he asked his dad why he is circ'd when his dad is intact...hmm, you didn't happen to ask that, did you?

I'm happy for that little baby though!

[Greg B]

This is a great story, thanks for relating! I especially think it is valuable for two reasons.

First, it underscores how people may not even know whether they or a family memeber is circumcised. A study said 40% didn't even know if they themselves were circ'd or not, I believe. So proponents may be very wrong in their facts.

Second, it shows how overwhelming our fears and assumptions can be, and how quickly a person may jump to a conclusion and hold dear to it, ignoring other concerns and facts. Thiis makes it very very diffciult to argue or discuss with some people.

You are very lucky to have him. I think there are people who would not have been so honest, or who would have let their fears continue to cloud their thinking and would still have pressed for RIC.

Regards

[eepster]

Originally Posted by lawmama1984

I wonder if he asked his dad why he is circ'd when his dad is intact...hmm, you didn't happen to ask that, did you?

I'm happy for that little baby though!

Depending on when and where he was born, it would have just been done automatically. Up through the 1980, to prevent a baby boy born in a hospital from being circumcised on had to make a big fuss about not wanting it. My mom told me about all that she went through to make sure none of us would be. Of course we were all girls, but this was in the days before ultrasounds, so they didn't know what we would be.

[Toolip]

Originally Posted by lawmama1984

I wonder if he asked his dad why he is circ'd when his dad is intact...hmm, you didn't happen to ask that, did you?

I'm happy for that little baby though!

I would like to know the details of this conversation as well. My impression is that he was talking to his mom about it but I don't know for sure.