Griffin Jude was born September 17 at 10:27 am. He's 7 lbs 8 ounces, 19 1/2 inches long and the cutest guy ever. I can't believe how madly in love I am.
Labor started Tuesday night literally right after I finished doing some birth art. Contractions were about 5 minutes apart. I had bloody show - Called the midwife and doula ... we were making progress, then DD woke up and I stalled. Contractions slowed to 1 hour apart. I tried walking but it didn't help. Everyone left after about 5 hours. I continued to have contractios throughout the night every hour ... waking me up.
Wednesday morning DH stayed home from work and we just hung out, went to the store. DD went to school. Around 2 there was more bloody show and contractions were getting more difficult. By evening contractions were getting closer, I just wanted my DD in bed before labor hit me. She went to sleep. Called my doulas. They came over and things picked up. They called the midwife around 11:00. I had a LONG labor, with no real breaks. I was struggling with having this baby and believing I was pregnant and trying to make sense of it all. I never had that feeling where you just don't care if your naked (not that I cared that I was naked) but I was just totally aware of everything that was going on around me. I had a hard time going inside myself. I labored in the La Bassine for a few hours, tried the birth ball, but mostly just wanted to lie in bed on my left side.
Finally I started talking to the baby. I apologized for being afraid during pregnancy and said for him to trust me ... that I am a good mommy and he had a great big sister and dad waiting to meet him. When I would say I can't my doula would say I can do it I can do it ... and that really helped shift my focus.
He was born in 2 or 3 pushes while lying on my left side. One doula held my leg while my other doula fanned me while my husband held my hand while the midwife coached me. I wasn't letting him back in ... I held my space and panted and pushed that baby out! My water broke during pushing. He is so sweet and happy and healthy. He was COVERED in vernix and has the cutest furry shoulders.
I am so grateful for all of it. for working through my fears, for climbing the mountain of birth. For having my baby in my bed at home. For letting my husband in and allowing him to help me. We are so much closer now, because I trusted him enough to allow him to support me. Not that I didn't scream at him a bit ... but in the end we found a groove - together, and that is huge for us.
I am so happy. We are so happy.
Beautiful baby. Hard, long, difficult BEAUTIFUL and amazing birth.
Enjoy your little one!!! 
You'd better be careful!!!
