or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Talk Amongst Ourselves › Awkward Situation At New Chiro's Office - WWYD?
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Awkward Situation At New Chiro's Office - WWYD?

post #1 of 30
Thread Starter 
I went to a chiropractor this morning. This isn't my first time going to a chiro, but it was my first time at this particular office. I *really* liked his office and I also liked him. I think he will really help improve my overall health, not just my neck and back issues.

But...during my appointment, he repeatedly referred to me as "Young Lady" and "Kiddo." He never once called me by name. He is *maybe* 10 years older than I am. I am 35 years old and a mother of 4! I do look young, but he had my file (with my date of birth!) and I also mentioned that my oldest is in high school. It made me feel very uncomfortable and even demeaned in a way. He was very friendly, very professional, but I do NOT want him to call me those names. Chiro appts. tend to make me feel awkward anyway - they are (to me) very physically intimate, and I wish we had a female chiro in our area, but we don't. So I'm already feeling kind of awkward, and then to be called "Kiddo" and "Young Lady" on top of it is just too much. I can't imagine that he refers to his male patients my age as "kiddo!"

So...what do I do? I'm already dreading going back tomorrow and hearing myself referred to as a child. I feel uncomfortable (and I shouldn't, I know!) about just asking him to stop to his face - this is someone I'll be seeing a few times a week for multiple weeks, and I don't want things to be strained between us - though of course they're already strained on my end! I would rather not find a new chiro if I can help it - his is the closest office to my home, and I do feel like he's a good one. Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks.
post #2 of 30
when he says - welcome back kiddo - just look him in the eye and say - hey I've had 4 kids - let's stick with Mary (replace w/ real name) and smile.
post #3 of 30
Yeah, what she said. I think I'd say something similar. I tend to make jokes when I'm uncomfortable so I'd likely try and find a funny joking way to do it.

Good luck!
post #4 of 30
I once berated a doctor for calling my honey. I was in high school and told him my name was NOT Honey and I could show him my BC if he needed proof.

He never did it again.
post #5 of 30
I'd probably give him a weird look and say, "You do realize I'm 35, right?"
post #6 of 30
Maybe call him something like "buddy" or "tiger" or whatever else people call little boys (which drives my eleven year old CRAZY!!!)
post #7 of 30
Call him kiddo back. Constantly.
post #8 of 30
I guess I'm the odd one out

While I really dislike being called 'young lady' or 'miss', I like kiddo

it makes me feel young (and my dad calls me kiddo- so maybe some familiarity)

If I were uncomfortable, however, I would simply say "I'd prefer it if you call me _____.. thanks!"

He's a professional, and he shouldn't be phased by someone asking to be called by their name. If he is, then it's time to find a (nother) new chiro..

(eta: I like the calling him kiddo idea- though I'd crack and start LMAO..)
post #9 of 30
By the way, I totally get it. I'm 31 with 4 kids and rather accustomed to people referring to me by such names, and labor/delivery nurses assuming I'm a teen mom.
post #10 of 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by operamommy View Post
But...during my appointment, he repeatedly referred to me as "Young Lady" and "Kiddo." He never once called me by name. He is *maybe* 10 years older than I am. I am 35 years old and a mother of 4!
I have no suggestions, but oddly enough, the nurse at my doctor's office kept calling me young lady, and maybe even kiddo once when I went in last week for a pap smear, and I swear I am older than she is. I'm in my 40s. It almost seemed like she was trying to put me at ease or something, like she was nervous for me. I thought it kind of funny in my situation, but I can see how it would be annoying in yours. I like the idea of calling him Tiger or Buddy when he calls you Kiddo.
post #11 of 30
When my brother was 17 my mom's new boyfriend called him 'Tiger'

*I* thought it was funny.. (brother didn't.. which was even funnier!)
post #12 of 30
Call him Chief or Sport or Kiddo right back. Then say, "My name is _____ and I'd prefer it if you called me that."
post #13 of 30
He may be doing it because he is bad with names. Some people refer to everyone as honey or kiddo or whatever because of that. If that's the case...you will likely not be able to fix it.

Or he may have just had a bad day and couldn't remember your name (since you are new). If that's the case a gentle reminder might work.
post #14 of 30
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by elisent View Post
Call him kiddo back. Constantly.
See, this is actually what I do when waitresses call me "sweetie" - which drives me bonkers! But, I'm not ever going to see them again!

Gah, I cannot believe how stressed I am about this.
post #15 of 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by syn_ack89 View Post
He may be doing it because he is bad with names. Some people refer to everyone as honey or kiddo or whatever because of that. If that's the case...you will likely not be able to fix it.

Or he may have just had a bad day and couldn't remember your name (since you are new). If that's the case a gentle reminder might work.
I'm having a hard time picturing him refering to a male patient as 'honey' or 'kiddo' though..
post #16 of 30
I'd kind of laugh and say "Thanks for the complient! I answer better to Mary though." I'd just keep it light hearted and good natured and then if it continued I'd be more straight forward.

I do think it would be really funny for you to call him other nickname terms though!
post #17 of 30
that would bug me, but i'm not confrontational enough (or maybe it wouldn't bug me enough?) to ask the person to stop. i figure, it's their personality quirk, not something that reflects negatively on me. it doesn't mean i'm a kid. it means . . . he's weird?

i can kind of understand him trying to create that dynamic of him being paternal, so that there's less male-female tension, even though it's a stretch since there isn't much of an age difference.

however if it really does bother you enough to say something, i think saying "it's (your name)," when he calls you something other than your name is a good plan, just as you would if he called you something close to your name that wasn't quite right (like kathy instead of katie, or something).
post #18 of 30
No advice. My chiro calls me "kiddo" too. He is definitely 10 years + older than me but I am NO kiddo.

I kind of like it though... When I get called "mamn" I feel old. So I will take kiddo.

Maybe it is a chiro thing? LOL!
post #19 of 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by crukai View Post
No advice. My chiro calls me "kiddo" too. He is definitely 10 years + older than me but I am NO kiddo.

I kind of like it though... When I get called "mamn" I feel old. So I will take kiddo.

Maybe it is a chiro thing? LOL!
Maybe you have the same chiro!
post #20 of 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by _betsy_ View Post
say, "My name is _____ and I'd prefer it if you called me that."
That is what I'd do.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Talk Amongst Ourselves
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Talk Amongst Ourselves › Awkward Situation At New Chiro's Office - WWYD?