I wish I hadn't watched The Business of Being Born last night

[francesmama]

but not for why you might expect. I'm 38 weeks and until last night I've been feeling really calm and confident about labour and birth. The is my second time around, we are planning a homebirth, I have great midwives... but DAMN, until I watched the birth footage in that movie - I think I had forgotten just *how much* it hurts! Now I'm scared and freaking out!

The scene with the midwife labouring herself and sobbing is what I just *can't* get out of my head.

[callieollie]

You know, I LOVED The Business of Being Born but my huge complaint about it was that it depicted natural birth as just so PAINFUL. And believe me, I know that it can be (my first birth was 28 hours of excruciating back labor) but it can also be comfortable (my second birth was an easy 3 1/2 hypnobabies birth with virtually no discomfort at all). I wish they had shown at least one birth where the woman wasn't screaming in agony. Go watch some hypnobabies births on youtube. There are some really peaceful ones - get those images in your head!

[Tashakittie]

I delivered almost 3 weeks ago, my 2nd. It was an entirely different experience than my first. My first labor was 17 hours of alot of agony- which I attribute much of to the fear and anxiety DH and I both felt. I jumped at the opportunity for an epiural then. This time it was so different. We both felt our first DS taught us so much, and we'd experienced so much, we were as ready as we could be. My labor was so much less painful and shorter, when I woke my husband to time contractions, he realized I was in transition. We had no time to make it to the birth center, and DH delivered our baby on the kitchen floor. Our DS slipped right out of me- and I remember laughing as it happened, it felt amazing, almost orgasmic.
During my contractions, I did A LOT of visualizing, and talking myself through them. Imagining with the intensity, myself opening really big. The most helpful literature I came across was "Spiritual Midwifery." I really thought about those stories a lot during labor.
Looking back, I can honestly say, this labor was also the first time in my life I completely surrendered to something outside of myself and truly felt out of control of anything. I think that was why my labor progressed the way it did, and I really did not realize the reality of being in labor. I must say, it was amazing to give birth in my home.
I really wish the best for you during your labor and birth, and hope the experience happens the way you want it to!

[fwlady]

Yeah, I see this on YouTube homebirths. I just turn the volume off. My sister said the reason she did the epidurals, is because she always heard other women in labor, and she wasn't going to make all that racket. LOL Funny though, because even in my really painful labors (#2 and #4), I wasn't loud at all until the actual pushing. So, all those hours were just really introverted. Which is odd, since I am usually pretty extroverted and am pretty loud overall. I don't know that I even made any noise with our last one. His was so quick. Not all births are like that. But, maybe the ladies who aren't comfortable with videotaping are less likely to make noise. I always thought that it makes you tighten up and hurt more. Or, maybe it hurt more because they were being watched, KWIM? I know I was the noisest with my taped first VBAC birth. And, TBH, birth just hurts. After #6, I just couldn't forget it anymore. Kymberli

[bubbamummy]

I must be pretty lucky, painful is really not a word I would have used to describe my labour with DS. Transition was bad....very bad, but totally dealable. The pushing part rocked. I actually enjoyed it. I remember thinking 'wow...is this really it???'

[phatchristy]

My first was the toughest by far. So, I hope you're practicing your optimal foetal positioning and staying positive. It seems like from most women I've talked to the first being the toughest is the case. I know my second was near precipitous, my third was longer than the second but he came out posterior, and then my fourth was so quick it was an accidental UC. I had like three really painful contractions the last time. Kind of makes me want to do it again LOL.

[S.Elise]

Yeah, Cara's birth story/footage in BOBB was pretty scary....but the fact is, she still DID it, and I thought the other ladies were actually fairly calm (other than Abbey, but that was a bad situation).

I am also planning my first HB (first baby, had an epi) so I understand the way you feel. And I am actually expecting that I will be just like Cara. I told my doula her #1 job is to keep me from sneaking out and walking to the hospital...its three blocks away and I am pretty sure I'll try to do it some point. But I have to say, it is so reassuring to know that even if it as bad as it was for Cara, pain-wise, you CAN get through it and when its done, there will most likely be so much less pain and problems than if you got pain relief.

[cocoanib]

I thought the births in that movie looked pretty peaceful, except for Cara's.
The model and her husband's birth experience was very calm and so was the Mom who did the waterbirth with her son nearby. No screaming in agony or anything.
Even Ricky's wasn't that bad. Just the part where she was doubting herself (probably transistion), but she didn't look or sound as if she was dying or anything.