dinner etiquette?

[1972momma]

OK, so, I'm finally at my wits' end. We have a 4 year old and a 2.5 year old (and a baby, but she doesn't count yet ) and they seem to be physically incapable of staying at the dinner table during a meal. I mean, even for 10 minutes.

Does anyone else have this problem?

We have tried using the high chair (which has buckles), and also taking away dinner if they get down from their chairs, but so far nothing has worked. They are both very active kids, but still I just can't get past the feeling that especially by 4 and change, one should be able to sit down for a meal.

But, we don't want to go too far and be mean.

Help!

[InMediasRes]

I don't know about the 4 yo, but my 2.5yo is incapable of sitting through a meal. My new favorite is coughing dramatically and spitting out his food onto the table.

We just finished with putting our feet on the table, and that comes back occasionally.

I just wanted to commiserate. I hope somone else has some good advice.

[Hoopin' Mama]

I often have to remind my almost 5yo to "sit back down please"

If he gets antsy, we play I-Spy while eating or start telling stories.

If he is truly full already, we do remind him to tell us that he would like to be excused before bounding off. We also request that he bring his plate to the kitchen sink.

From what I've seen at friends' homes, consistency is key. Unfortunately, due to alternating work schedules, where when and how we eat dinner is not always consistent.

We eat out once a week, and ds is perfectly capable of having good restaurant manners. At home, it can get rather uncivilized.

[Hoopin' Mama]

I think the 2.5 yo behaviour is pretty age-appropriate.

[reezley]

We don't have consistent dinners together as a family, so staying at the table is not something I really expect from my 4.75yo and my 2.5yo. Usually they eat earlier than dh and me, and eat quickly and leave the table, then come back for another few bites and are done. For the couple times a week that we are all actually sitting down to dinner at the same time, I don't get annoyed with them getting up (dh does I think), but am trying to keep the noise and craziness level low in the dining room - so our rule is to do any noisy playing in the living room. With many reminders, we get through dinner...

[ssh]

My almost 4 year old DD loves the idea of all us eating at the table. She can't sit still for very long so she gets up several times during the meal. She will often get everyone a napkin and lately brings us small glasses of water. Since she doesn't stop moving even while she's asleep I figure it's just part of her temperament and I don't worry about it.

[MtBikeLover]

DS as a 4 year old could sit at the table without being asked. Even now, he is frequently at the table longer than myself. I kind of took it for granted and never understood other parents that complained about their kids not sitting down for dinner.

But 4.5yo DD is totally the opposite - she can't sit for 2 minutes without jumping up and doing something. It drives me batty because what should be a 15 minute meal turns into 45 minutes and I have to wait til she is done to clean up or else I end up cleaning up 2x.

I want to eat, clean up, and have time to play but DD is making it very difficult.

No advice...just commiserating with you!

[Ellp]

Yup, that sounds like my two who are the same age. The 2yo's thing is to stand on her chair to reach for things across the table. The 4yo won't stop talking long enough to take a bite. She almost has to be reminded to take every bite.

It drives me batty.