Keeping the Sabbath--or simply a day to relax and enjoy your family Tribe

[PoetryLover]

I read a blog recently about a woman who realized that her family was way too busy. She felt a very strong need to slow life down a little. Ultimately what she decided to do was to keep the Sabbath, one day a week with minimal cooking and cleaning. A day to just relax and enjoy her family, play games, pursue hobbies, visit friends or family, etc.

I read this blog a number of weeks ago, and I've felt a very strong urge to have one day a week that I can let go of my To Do list and guiltlessly relax. Possibly this is appealing even more to me now as I'm starting a family. It doesn't really matter the day one chooses to be their Sabbath. Some choose Saturday; some choose Sunday. Some choose to keep the Sabbath for religious reasons. Some may not even call it a Sabbath, but set aside one day a week for relaxation and fun.

I'm plannning to have simple meals either cooked the day before or frozen to unthaw and reheat. Cooking, for me, will entail simply heating up something nutritious for my family for supper and simple breakfasts and lunches on this day (such as cereal, sandwiches and leftovers). The only "chores" will simply be for my family to pick up after themselves (close cupboard doors, hang coats, etc.) and, of course, to wash the dishes that we dirty. Some folks may choose to do it differently. My family will also attend Quaker Meeting on Sundays and possibly have a small Bible Study, but the rest of the day is for play and relaxation.

Is anyone interested in starting a Keeping the Sabbath Tribe where we can discuss our experiences and support each other in moving toward a more simple life? I'd love to hear your ideas, including how your family keeps the Sabbath if you do or how you envision Keeping the Sabbath to ideally be. Likewise, struggles and triumphs with keeping the Sabbath are also welcome to be shared.

[boigrrrlwonder]

I would be in. We don't currently keep the Sabbath, but I would love to get support so that we could start!

[Magelet]

We keep shabbat (the sabbeth). I'd love to join the tribe. I just have to run at the moment, but I'll be back later.

[Nikki74]

We also keep shabbat...

[smeisnotapirate]

As do we. It'll be interesting to see the different ways people choose to keep it. I tend to keep a very orthodox shabbos, except that I will drive to services (too far to walk).

[LambQueen]

Sabbath observer here! Of the Saturday type sabbath. We start it at sundown on Friday night (enter the pagan element of Judaism). Here's a great gift to sabbath observance: the Crock Pot! Any holy Jew will agree. you can make all sorts of yummy stuff in it. put it up before your sabbath, and sit down to your meal hours later with no muss, no fuss! Actually, many holy Jews will also agree on the Crock Pot Liner . This makes the clean up much easier (though cooking that food in plastic grosses me out)

We do some type of treat, and also have "breakfast dessert" which means the kids will get pudding or something like that after eating a healthy breakfast.

Some families allow their children junky cereals for sabbath breakfast.

We attend services (at Synagogue), but sometimes it's what we call "Sharai Shayna" which means we go to the synagogue called the "Gates of Sleep" which means we hang out in pjs at home in the morning. That's very rare for us, but it's been done. The joke is many Jewish synagogues (redundant; aren't all synagogues Jewish?) have the name "Gates" in it.

We have potluck lunches with friends after services. Usually it's a veggie/dairy meal. We meet up in the local park. We sometimes have friends over for what's called the "Third Meal" (Seudah shlishit/shaloshudos) which is a late afternoon meal on the day of Shabbat (Judaism talks about having 3 festive meals on the sabbath, but really, after all that eating, thr 3rd meal ends up being pretty light, something like a salad , usually tuna or egg salad and some bread).

We sing songs together (we do not use musical instruments).

we tell stories.

We lounge around and read the paper

I wear a "shabbos robe" which is essentially pretty nightgowns, almost like a dress , to dinner Friday night.

I like wearing PJ's on friday night so the shabbos robe makes it nicer.

To quote one of my favorite uncles:

"Shabbos is in the air. Table set with silverware. Candlesticks are glowing, that special shabbos light."

Shabbos/sabbath is just great!

[Magelet]

For shabbat, on friday night, it starts with preparation. I make sure any internet stuff and work stuff is done beforehand, and then post a "grateful fridays" post on my blog. (this helps me get in a shabbat mood). We make sure the house is fairly clean (the goal is to have it clean enough for guests, but its a work in progress). we dress in nice clothes, and have a nice meal ready before sundown (usually. sometimes its finished after sundown but the candles are always lit before). (though because we HAVE to work and can't always choose our work schedules, we may be doing this after sundown in the winter. Its not "allowed", but we may do it anyways.) The table is cleared, and ideally the house is clean. I light two candles using the traditional jewish blessing, we say the blessing over the wine (more often grape juice. we don't drink a whole bottle in a night, and grape juice doesn't oxidize so it lasts several shabbats. overall, its less expensive.), and then we say a blessing over challah (usually homemade, but at the lease, an uncut loaf of bread of some sort. even a pita or bagel or cornbread will do.)

I'm hoping soon we will start singing more, there are some traditional songs I'm learning I want to sing and I want to sing in general. (a song filled house is something that is very important to me for our children when we have them. And I know that if we don't have a song filled house before they are born, it is unlikely that we will create one after.)

Before or after the meal, we say a blessing over each other, something inspired in that moment. Sometimes we'll also say what we're thankful for or proud of in the other person. We eat a lingering meal together (or sometimes we'll go to a friends house for shabbat evening.), and then read and talk (often DP will read to me, from shalom aleichem's the old country or some other anthology).

Saturday morning, I usually go to services at synagogue and then we spend the afternoon doing some non-computer thing together thats really doing something together(he uses the computer if he wants while I'm out, but the rest is together time.) sometimes, I'll decide I don't feel like going to synagogue, sleep in together, and then spend the whole day together. sometimes we have dinner with my parents, sometimes just us.

I'm a little worried about my ability to draw a boundary between my beloved shabbats and my need to work. I may have no choice but to sacrifice shabbat to pay bills (if it would mean losing the job I just got, I can't, kwim?). I'm going to try my dangest to hold on to friday nights though. I'm not giving that up, and I'm at the least hoping for not working saturdays regularly. I do not want to give up shabbat, I love them, and beleive that G-d wants/requires us to celebrate shabbat, but I need to pay my rent and food, and I need this job desperately. Its really hard to maintain boundaries when you are in desperate need. I can't really say "I need this day, no matter what, and I'll not take the job if if I can't have it." you know? well, I'm calling the manager now to talk about it, pray it works out for me!!

[imnottelling]

Originally Posted by LambQueen

Sabbath observer here! Of the Saturday type sabbath. We start it at sundown on Friday night (enter the pagan element of Judaism). Here's a great gift to sabbath observance: the Crock Pot! Any holy Jew will agree. you can make all sorts of yummy stuff in it. put it up before your sabbath, and sit down to your meal hours later with no muss, no fuss! Actually, many holy Jews will also agree on the Crock Pot Liner . This makes the clean up much easier (though cooking that food in plastic grosses me out)

Not sure if I'm holy, but I agree

We do some type of treat, and also have "breakfast dessert" which means the kids will get pudding or something like that after eating a healthy breakfast.

Some families allow their children junky cereals for sabbath breakfast.

Yeah, for us, it's Multi Grain Cheerios instead of regular Cheerios

I wear a "shabbos robe" which is essentially pretty nightgowns, almost like a dress , to dinner Friday night.

More like a hostess gown than a nightgown...
razadesigns.com is a good example

[smeisnotapirate]

Originally Posted by imnottelling

More like a hostess gown than a nightgown...
razadesigns.com is a good example

Oh, wow. I'm lusting after those kimonos.