If you don't celebrate Christmas... - Page 3

[Ellien C]

Originally Posted by Mrs. Turner

Thanks for all of your advice and ideas!

I guess I mainly am looking for advice on how to deal with my dc's interests in the holiday without celebrating it or anything else. We do look forward to Thanksgiving and birthdays and have lots of fun with those days!

Would learning more about them help, like the family that learned about Hannaukah? Or do you feel like, being Christian, you already get what they are about?

[JessicaS]

I am just moving this to Religious Studies since I think people will be more comfortable in here. It can be difficult to really stretch out and put your feet up in what seems like a religious thread in parenting.

[Theoretica]

Originally Posted by philomom

Children do crave ritual and tradition. To fill that need/possible void... I invented Soup and Solstice. A big no gifts party that has all our friends come over on the Dec 21st for soup. Every year there is a different crew of friends and neighbors who are still in town at that time of year. We decorate sun cookies... sing silly songs about the light or sunshine and just enjoy being together.

Can I steal this idea? We always do a solstice 'thing' but I REALLY like the 'soup and solstice' get together idea!!! And the sun cookies...cool! Methinks you should start a thread to talk about it

[Barefoot~Baker]

Originally Posted by Ellien C

Would learning more about them help, like the family that learned about Hannaukah? Or do you feel like, being Christian, you already get what they are about?

Thanks for your suggestion Yes, I do know what the Christian holidays are about, I'm not as familiar with others. However, I do want to stay away from any religious holidays. I actually am wavering a little on Easter, but for now we're still not doing it.

[Callimom]

Originally Posted by Theoretica

Can I steal this idea? We always do a solstice 'thing' but I REALLY like the 'soup and solstice' get together idea!!! And the sun cookies...cool! Methinks you should start a thread to talk about it

totally OT but check out the book called Sun Bread by Elsa Kleven if you are going to do this. It's about a baker that throws a party to entice the sun to come back - lovely for kids on solstice without any religious connotations. (and it has a recipe for sun bread on the back)

[EviesMom]

If you want to celebrate something, I suggest celebrating the Winter Solstice, as it's a natural, scientific phenomena close in time to Christmas and allows for many of the same basic concepts: crafts, family, evergreens, light, firelight, candles, the sun, small treasures that have been hidden away to ease the darkness of the long winter. It can be done "pagan," but it can also be done as humanist/scientist/fact-based. Likewise Summer Solstice, and both equinoxes. These are based on the earth's passage around the sun which causes seasons. The seasons have been celebrated in some fashion since humankind began, probably, and winter quite heavily, because it's a hard season for humans to get through, from ancient peoples to George Washington and his men at Valley Forge, to modern day.

[philomom]

Originally Posted by Theoretica

Can I steal this idea? We always do a solstice 'thing' but I REALLY like the 'soup and solstice' get together idea!!! And the sun cookies...cool! Methinks you should start a thread to talk about it

Steal away. My kids, now teens, are proud of the fact that I "invented" a celebration.

Though to be fair, primitive peoples celebrated the solstice to keep away the dark and welcome back the life-giving sun. It wasn't much of a stretch to imagine a yummy hot soup or stew over the firepit.... to feed and warm the tribe.

[Earth Momma]

wow my kids are also 5 1/2, 4, almost 2 mos and we have a 2 yr old too! We do not celebrate christmas either. Last year I spent months "preparing" for all the questions I was sure I would get from the kids. I read everything I could find, talked to every one I knew who did not celebrate, interviewed every Jewish person I could find (BTW many are offended by those who suggest that hanukkah is the jewish christmas). Well, ironically, they never asked!

But what I learned is that all the answers to all the questions come down to what our standard of values is, what our belief system is. I find that when you're learning your place in the world, you take what you know and what you do and compare it to others. Therefore, we teach our kids what we believe in and also what others do and why. Our hope is that we're fostering not just education but respect.

My MIL is "amazed" that the kids know who santa is and that they know he doesn't come to their house - and again they've never asked us.

[genifer]

Hey Mrs. Turner, is the reason you dont celebrate these holidays bc, being a christian, you cant abide the fact that they are steeped in pagan traditions? Or is it bc your particular branch of Christianity doesnt celebrate any holidays? This will help in advising further.

I am a christian and I love Christmas. I would love to understand the jewish holidays better but that will come with time. Those are the ones I, personally, would consider valid days worth celebrating bc they were days given by God for special rememberance. But I dont want to hijack holidays just for the fun of it. I think we need, well not need but ykwim, we should have days and reasons to rejoice and celebrate, and days where we can remember and celebrate certain things. I love birthdays. LOVE them!!! I love Christmas, even tho christians 'stole' it from pagans. I love what we turned it into, not the commercialism, clearly, but celebrating the birth of our Savior.

But anyway, knowing why you dont celebrate would help in giving advice. If its bc of pagan leanings (as a christian) suggesting celebrating solstace isnt an option. Christians would consider that a pagan holiday.

[christianmomof3]

I think that if you have reasons for not celebrating the holidays that you might want to share those reasons with your children.
Do you want them to know why you don't celebrate those holidays?
Without knowing why, it may be difficult for them to understand.
Even if you can explain why you don't celebrate those holidays, they may still not agree with your reasons, but at least they will know what they are.
I was raised Jewish and we did not do Christian holidays because we were not Christian. I wanted to have a decorated Christmas tree, but I knew that was not going to happen. The funny thing, is that we did the whole Santa Claus thing and the stockings on the fireplace and we did the Easter bunny thing too because my parents did not see those as having to do with the Christian religion as much as just fun stuff for kids.
Now I am a born again Christian, and we do not celebrate Christmas or Easter, nor do we do Santa or the Easter bunny.
We have told our children we just don't do that because they are not in the Bible nor is there any reason to do those things. We have read them the verses from Leviticus about not decorating trees with silver and gold and explained them and they are aware that today's Christians are not praying to their trees, but that the Bible does say not to do that.
We also tell our children that their school friends are not "wrong" for celebrating those holidays, it is just what their familys choose to do and not what we do.

[NishaG]

JW here, and, as many of you know, we don't celebrate Christmas, Easter, and other pagan-rooted holidays or birthdays.

We do, however, explain to our children why we do not celebrate them, and endeavor to find other ways to have fun and give gifts to each other on just regular days.

I am currently in the process of planning a semi-annual Kid's Day, with a few other JW families, and we also have an individual Kid's Day within our immediate family, where each kid gets to request something special just for them (on their 'day"), it could be a family outing of their choosing, visiting a friend, a movie of their choice, bowling, going to McDonalds or a special project.

[Barefoot~Baker]

Originally Posted by genifer

Hey Mrs. Turner, is the reason you dont celebrate these holidays bc, being a christian, you cant abide the fact that they are steeped in pagan traditions? Or is it bc your particular branch of Christianity doesnt celebrate any holidays? This will help in advising further.

Hey there, yeah that's the main reason. It's not Jesus's birthday, the early church didn't celebrate it, and we were specifically told in the bible to remember his death.

Thanks everyone for sharing your thoughts and advice. I have more of an idea of where to go with this once my kids become curious.