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If your child was still nursing at 3...

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 
can you tell me what the self-weaning process looked like? How much longer did they nurse? Were they nursing a lot at 3, or just occasionally?

My DD1 turns 3 this week. She is still nursing, and would nurse a LOT if I let her. I'm also nursing DD2 who just turned one. I've had to set some limits with DD1 and honestly, I'm really ready to be done. I know she's not ready, but is she ever going to be?

I'd just like to hear from other moms who have BTDT about how this went for them. I only know one mom IRL who has nursed as long...
post #2 of 13
I'm currently nursing DD1 3.4yo and DD2 7mos. When DD2 was born DD1 ramped up her nursing (hello milk!) but by 3 she was only asking a few times a week. I didn't do anything differently, I guess she was just distracted by other things. She is still only nursing once or twice a week usually, but today she asked three times!

For us, I do occassionally redirect DD1 if it isn't convenient or whatever. I also have a little ditty..."5,4,3,2,1 and we're done" (in a sing songy voice) for if nursing is uncomfortable. She doesn't seem bothered by either and usually pops off fairly quickly anyway.

Here's to hoping you can find a happy medium! I never expected to be nursing this long, but I am really enjoying the connection it gives DD1 and I, especially with the new gal around.
post #3 of 13
I can't help with any info on how weaning is likely to go at this stage. My daughter is 3.2 and nurses like a fiend when she can. I'll be reading this thread for info.
post #4 of 13
DD #1 was nursing very briefly at bed and in the morning when she was 3 (I was pg). She continued this pattern, first dropping the bedtime nursing around 4.5 and then weaned completely at 5.5. I probably could have nudged her to wean earlier if I wanted to, but I didn't.

DD #2 was nursing like a fiend at 3, still nursing a lot at night and nursing multiple times a day. She's been much more attached to nursing than her older sister. She's now almost 5 and nurses very briefly at bedtime and wakeup, and occasionally once at night. I actually think she'll wean at around the same time, since at this point there just isn't much milk for her. She's started talking about being done nursing "soon." We'll see.
post #5 of 13
My first was a nursing fiend till about 3.5, and she went to before bed only. Then a couple days before her 4th birthday, she was done. My 2nd recently turned 3 and nurses morning, when I get home from work, evening and at night a couple times. I'm waiting to see if things change drastically at 3.5 like they did with my first.

I'm actually glad that DD2 isn't ready to be done yet because of it being H1N1 season. Super glad that I have breastmilk for her if she were to get sick.
post #6 of 13
Both of mine were still nursing at 3, though not remotely at the same time! They're 8.5 years apart in age.

For DS, who completely weaned just after turning 5, he began at some point to limit his nursing to naps. I can't tell you when that occurred, but that was definitely the association made sometime after 3. So as he dropped naps in that last year of nursing, he nursed less and less until the day a month after he'd turned 5 when we were lying down for a nap and it'd been so long that he discovered that he'd forgotten how. It was time; he was ready; though he didn't consciously know that until that moment.

With DD, who stopped a few months after having turned 7, the taper-down was much more long and drawn out. It got to where she'd go for weeks sometimes, then nurse once/day for a few days, then back to the long gaps. She did not make that sleep association so much. At 3, she was still at least 2-3 times/day. The limits I set were of the "not before supper when I'm cooking" nature. If she was really needing to, I could sit down for her after things weren't needing my immediate attention. By 3, I figured she could start learning how to wait. Sometimes she discovered that maybe she hadn't needed to so much after all.

In my experience, each one grew out of this in their own way according to their own personalities and needs. HTH
post #7 of 13
DS was still nursing a lot at 3, probably because he saw his baby sister nurse a lot too. By 4, he was down to just before bed, and slowly tapered off till we both agreed to stop when he was 4.75 years. DD was down to once a day before bed by 3, and now is more like 1-2 times a week before bed and she just turned 4. Not sure if she will completely wean before my new baby comes or not, but if not, I expect it to be a bit longer after that newborn milk comes in before she weans. So for my kiddos, the pattern seems to be around 4.5ish.
post #8 of 13
My first dd self-weaned around 4.5. She nursed at least once every day of her life for over 3 years (including during my pg with DD2 and immediately after delivery -- we nursed in the visiting room at the hospital!). I struggled to put limits on her because at first she wanted to nurse every time I nursed DD2, but she did get over that in a few months. (I would offer to read stories, play, etc., but she really wanted the boob!)

Somewhere around 3.5 she started lowering the intensity and only wanting it once or twice a day (bedtime, for one biggie). I also limited her time and offered distractions, but never cut her off completely. By age 4 she would even skip a day here or there especially if we were out of our routine. Around 4.5 she pretty much stopped, although she still asked once a week or so for a while. I still remember her asking, my saying yes, and her looking up with confusion, "I think I've forgotten how! Giggle giggle..." and that's how we knew we were finally done.
post #9 of 13
I only have one child (DD who is now almost 9, but self-weaned right before her 4th bday) so I can't speak to the issue of tandem nursing. But I will say that I noticed that if I turned her away she would want to nurse even more. And, of course, if she was not feeling well, that would increase her need for nursing. So I let her nurse whenever she wanted and that helped fulfill her need. Also, she started to get a little more "busy" at that age.

You have to do whatever is best for your family and I hope everything works out well for all of you. You don't need me to tell you that you're doing an amazing job. (((hugs)))
post #10 of 13
I'm nursing a 4.5 year old boy and a 2.75 boy, my older boy is starting to forget to nurse when he gets busy playing or whatever he is up to. I think he would be totally weaned if he didn't see his younger brother nursing and reminding him.

He nurses in the morning, when he comes home from preschool (half day afternoons) and right before bed. I notice the time is getting shorter now though, maybe only 10 minutes each time where my younger boy will nurse for 45 easily.
post #11 of 13
Both of my kids were marathon nursers at 3. Several times a day and ofcourse at wake up and bedtime.

dd went on to nurse for years and was probably 9 the last time she asked to nurse. Ds still nurses at 6.5 yrs but only some mornings when he first wakes up.
post #12 of 13
At 3 we were nursing: morning after waking, nap, bedtime, and maybe if something really upset him.
post #13 of 13
Originally Posted by MomToKandE View Post
At 3 we were nursing: morning after waking, nap, bedtime, and maybe if something really upset him.
oh right, I forgot to say that, my older boy will really want to nurse if he has an ouchie or if he's not feeling well. I was planning to nurse until 3, but at 4.5 there is no end in sight
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