Anyone Tandeming?

[GradysMom]

3yo Ds was almost weaned when I was 8 mo pregnant. Toward the end of the pregnancy-feeling the impending change I guess- he picked up nursing frequency. I was open to tandem... but unsure.

Now my ds has seen the pics in Adventures in Tandem Nursing and wants me to double nurse and such. DD seems jealous when shes in the room and ds is nursing so I have ended up doing alot of that the last few days with mixed emotions. I really feel so bleh about it. Some moments are great but I kinda want ds to wean and yet when he gets close to doing it I freak a little and offer the breast.

I've always been a bit clingy with ds so... oh I don't know what I'm getting at. I'm just so touched out, yet I want to be able to lean on the convienence that nursing provides in the emotional repairs department.

Anyone else in this boat? Started tandem, now wonders what to do... how long etc?

[Mamatoabunch]

I am tandeming, nursing Finnian, Eiley and Innish. It is a load at times, but better overall for my two older ones.

[wombatclay]

I nursed through dd2's pregnancy and then tandem nursed for almost 2 years. DD2 decided she didn't like pregnancy milk and weaned while I was pregnant with ds, and although she has nursed 2-3 times since his birth she hasn't kept it up.

But I remember being really really touched out at first... dd1 wanted to nurse EVERY single time I nursed dd2. What finally worked for me was to "just say no" to nursing both kiddos at the same time. One after another was fine, but both at the same time was too much. Then I also limited dd1's nursing sessions by singing a song or telling a story while nursing her... when the song.story was done so was the nursing session. if I was feeling really good it would be a long story, but if I realized I was about to freak out then the song got pretty short! After a while I started encouraging dd1 to nurse at certain times... when she eventually weaned (around 4yo) I had three "openings". She could nurse in the morning, at nap, and then before bed. She didn't have to nurse then, but if she decided not to nurse at nap time (for example) then she had to wait till bedtime (assuming no "emegency nursing" or "booboo nursing").

Anyway, I found that tandem nursing was a great tool and I don't regret doing it (and kind of wish it were an option this time). But it was really important for me to feel like I had some control and to keep a very close eye on my emotional/physical state. Being able to limit the duration of a nursing session and eventually limiting the number of sessions let me continue enjoying the experience. So I'm a big fan of balance and being tuned into your needs as well as those of your nurslings.

Hope you enjoy the journey!

[redpajama]

I'm tandem nursing.

Oh, plus I also nurse my newborn.

My 2.75-year-old is still nursing somewhere between 3 and 1 million times a day. My 4.5-year-old is just *barely* still nursing, although admittedly I am often putting him off (often indefinitely). He nurses once every week or two. At this point, I don't really consider him still nursing, although I suspect he will nurse here-and-there for a bit longer before he is really, completely, finally finished. I actually had sort of forgotten that he was still nursing now-and-again, and in the context of a conversation about supply, I said, "Well, I'm nursing two kids on two breasts, so I don't see why you couldn't nurse one kid on one breast," and my son interjected, "Um, Mom? I think you meant to say that you're nursing *three* kids on two breasts--remember? I'm not weaned?"

For me, tandem nursing has been a really positive experience. I think it has helped with the transition of not being the "baby" anymore; helped the new-big-sibling to feel a little less displaced by the incoming baby, I think. At times I suppose it can feel a little demanding but, for me, the benefits outweigh the drawbacks so dramatically that I hardly notice.
I know this isn't every woman's experience, though--and it seems like women's responses to tandem nursing really sort of hit both ends of the spectrum (sometimes both ends at *once*). I understand, for sure, why some women don't prefer it and choose not to do it. For us, though, it's been a wonderful arrangement for all of us.

[brooklynbabymama]

My 21-month old still gets some at naptime and bedtime unless she crashes on the go, which has been our arrangement since ~14 months. But I'm reaching my limit with tandeming. I committed mentally to giving her three months after her brother arrived before initiating weaning so she could get through the transition and also so she'd reap the benefits of my milk coming back. Dry/colostrum nursing through 2nd and 3rd trimesters wasn't too fun for either of us! Girl has gained two pounds since baby came.

This week is problematic, though. She has only ever gone to sleep at home via nursing and I need to get her able to fall asleep before I can wean. So I'm nursing sitting up and then laying down with her (we co-sleep) to fall asleep. She has a lot of trouble with it, we've had one successful bedtime and pretty much all the rest of nap and bedtimes have been tantrums. But it's not CIO if I'm there with her...right?

Oh, and I've never nursed both together. Those pics in Adventures in Tandem Nursing scared the hell out of me, I just can't wrap my brain around going double-barrel.