FIL & MIL refuse to promise to not let DD CIO if they watch her - Page 3

[Ldavis24]

Udate

Updated:
DH talked to his father again and flat out asked him why even if he disagreed about how we parent and what we expect from a babysitter why couldn't he just respect that and still do what we expected from a babysitter. Apparently FIL muttered something about talking about it later and when they did finally still was totally non-commital about the CIO issue. He even asked DH if he thought he was abused as a child to which DH replied no and explained that he didn't think that he was parented badly (although personally CIO is a big no no to me and DH) but that we simply wanted to do it a different way...

DH left it off with his father still refusing to promise he wouldn't let her CIO and DH basically told him thats fine but you will not be babysitting her for a very long time. FIL got all huffy and stomped off apparently (they work together) and DH left it at that.

DH told his dad that he is welcome to come discuss it with anytime as I am the ultimate authority in regard to who is babysitting DD (aren't all the mamas?) and that I would be happy to explain it to him in very clear terms. So I guess no grandpa and grandma babysitting which is a shame because he is her only grandfather.

[limabean]

That's too bad that FIL chose to respond in that way, but good for your DH for stating his (and your) position so clearly. I'm sure that was hard for him, and he did awesome.

Originally Posted by Ldavis24

So I guess no grandpa and grandma babysitting which is a shame because he is her only grandfather.

I'm confused here -- your DD will still get to visit her grandparents with you and DH, right? Just because they won't be babysitting in the near future doesn't mean she'll be completely deprived of a relationship with them. My grandmother never babysat me (just wasn't her thing), but I saw her regularly and had a wonderful relationship with her.

[Ldavis24]

Originally Posted by limabean

That's too bad that FIL chose to respond in that way, but good for your DH for stating his (and your) position so clearly. I'm sure that was hard for him, and he did awesome.



I'm confused here -- your DD will still get to visit her grandparents with you and DH, right? Just because they won't be babysitting in the near future doesn't mean she'll be completely deprived of a relationship with them. My grandmother never babysat me (just wasn't her thing), but I saw her regularly and had a wonderful relationship with her.

She will absolutely still have a relationship with them. We go over often and its odd because DH's father is so caring and lovey with her this whole situation seems really out of character for him. It is very in character for his wife though so there might be some influence there...

Anyway DD will certainly get lots of supervised time with her grandpa and grandma. My father lives far away and we have a distant relationship at best (he has also shown very little interest in DD) so he won't really be in the picture and I want her to have a good relationship with at least one grandfather!