Hi, I have posted here once or twice but mostly lurk. I am going through a difficult time mentally and emotionally. I felt I had to write.
My family was going through a sort of housing crisis. I have a family history of depression and anxiety, and I have struggled with depression and dysthymia during my young life. I am mostly writing this to vent or perhaps hear words of encouragement from mama's who have been in similar situations.
My MIL was diagnosed with a rare cancer several months ago. DH and I didnt like the town we had moved to and had been living in for the past 2 years. We thought it might be a good change to move closer to MIL to help out and help with her 16 yr old son when she is in the hosp for extended periods. We found a decent apartment for ourselves and our 7 mo DS. 3 bedrooms, 2 bath, plenty of room, and in the neighborhood we wanted to be in. Only thing was it would be a month until it was available and our current lease was to end the 1st of sep. That was okay with us. We stayed at MIL's for a while, I took time to visit my mother, and finally the long month of September came to a close.
A day before our new lease took effect DH called the LL to get the keys. He then informed us the the current tenants are not out yet. Baffled DH told him to call us back when he had a better idea of what was going on. He called back to inform us that we can move in the next day as planned. We asked if the apartment would have been cleaned and he said no. So we then opted to wait 3 days to move to allow time for the place to be proffessionally cleaned as per our lease agreement (every tenant upon moving in pays a non-refundable $300 cleaning deposit so the place is clean for a new tenant to move in. We had payed ours and assumingly the prior tenants had payed theirs). So we waited. Last saturday DH got up early and went with his mother to get the keys and drop off the first load of our belongings. I stayed behind to feed and nurse DS and get him ready for the day. I got a phone call an hour later. Apparently the place looked like a storm had blown over inside. The carpets streaked with dirt, cat pee covered by a rug on the linolium, stove pilot lights out leaking gas into the place, a section of the metal trim on the carpet was bent straight upwards, walls filthy. I ask DH what the LL was doing and he replied "vacuuming paint chips out of the windowsills." MIL and DH returned - MIL fuming mad, both thought it best that our son is not brought to the apartment until it is taken care of. The LL swares the carpets were professionally cleaned and he had hired a made to clean the rest of the apartment. We speak to him several time on the phone and he wont budge, saying it was already cleaned. So we have FIL who is also an attorney call and compromise a way to get the place clean so we can move in. The LL told FIL he had a better idea, he would simply refund us all the money and not allow us to move in. At that point we accepted the offer. Now we were out an apartment and desperately looking for a new one. On top of that, the LL then decided he never said he would refund us and we are forced to go to court to get our money back.
All of a sudden homeless and staying with family, I started to feel depressed and hopeless. How could this have all happened? I never never in a million years wanted this. Only yesterday we found somewhere that is livable. It is not nearly as spacious, but we will have to make it work.
I really have to be present. I really cannot allow myself to slump into a deep depression again. Even tho we have a place to live, I am starting to feel that all to familiar depression welling up inside of me. I have worked hard to stay off meds. This has been a hellish month and a half. I feel even more fearful because i am even farther from my mother and family, in a new place with no friends. I need to stay hopeful, I need to be there for my son. Has anyone here felt hopeless lonely and depressed? An how do you deal with those feelings? I should probably seek counseling, too. I am trying to try harder and be well this changing season...
My family was going through a sort of housing crisis. I have a family history of depression and anxiety, and I have struggled with depression and dysthymia during my young life. I am mostly writing this to vent or perhaps hear words of encouragement from mama's who have been in similar situations.
My MIL was diagnosed with a rare cancer several months ago. DH and I didnt like the town we had moved to and had been living in for the past 2 years. We thought it might be a good change to move closer to MIL to help out and help with her 16 yr old son when she is in the hosp for extended periods. We found a decent apartment for ourselves and our 7 mo DS. 3 bedrooms, 2 bath, plenty of room, and in the neighborhood we wanted to be in. Only thing was it would be a month until it was available and our current lease was to end the 1st of sep. That was okay with us. We stayed at MIL's for a while, I took time to visit my mother, and finally the long month of September came to a close.
A day before our new lease took effect DH called the LL to get the keys. He then informed us the the current tenants are not out yet. Baffled DH told him to call us back when he had a better idea of what was going on. He called back to inform us that we can move in the next day as planned. We asked if the apartment would have been cleaned and he said no. So we then opted to wait 3 days to move to allow time for the place to be proffessionally cleaned as per our lease agreement (every tenant upon moving in pays a non-refundable $300 cleaning deposit so the place is clean for a new tenant to move in. We had payed ours and assumingly the prior tenants had payed theirs). So we waited. Last saturday DH got up early and went with his mother to get the keys and drop off the first load of our belongings. I stayed behind to feed and nurse DS and get him ready for the day. I got a phone call an hour later. Apparently the place looked like a storm had blown over inside. The carpets streaked with dirt, cat pee covered by a rug on the linolium, stove pilot lights out leaking gas into the place, a section of the metal trim on the carpet was bent straight upwards, walls filthy. I ask DH what the LL was doing and he replied "vacuuming paint chips out of the windowsills." MIL and DH returned - MIL fuming mad, both thought it best that our son is not brought to the apartment until it is taken care of. The LL swares the carpets were professionally cleaned and he had hired a made to clean the rest of the apartment. We speak to him several time on the phone and he wont budge, saying it was already cleaned. So we have FIL who is also an attorney call and compromise a way to get the place clean so we can move in. The LL told FIL he had a better idea, he would simply refund us all the money and not allow us to move in. At that point we accepted the offer. Now we were out an apartment and desperately looking for a new one. On top of that, the LL then decided he never said he would refund us and we are forced to go to court to get our money back.
All of a sudden homeless and staying with family, I started to feel depressed and hopeless. How could this have all happened? I never never in a million years wanted this. Only yesterday we found somewhere that is livable. It is not nearly as spacious, but we will have to make it work.
I really have to be present. I really cannot allow myself to slump into a deep depression again. Even tho we have a place to live, I am starting to feel that all to familiar depression welling up inside of me. I have worked hard to stay off meds. This has been a hellish month and a half. I feel even more fearful because i am even farther from my mother and family, in a new place with no friends. I need to stay hopeful, I need to be there for my son. Has anyone here felt hopeless lonely and depressed? An how do you deal with those feelings? I should probably seek counseling, too. I am trying to try harder and be well this changing season...
s I'd be pretty upset too. Did you get pictures of the apt for proof of its condition?
