So what one book should I read first?

[AileenM]

I don't have a lot of time, I'm pg and HAVE to nap when DD does, so I get maybe an hour at night to myself after she goes to bed. I'll be going to the library tomorrow or Monday, so what one book about GD should I look for? I've read (and own) 'How To Talk So Kids Will Listen...' And it was good, I'll probably read it again soon, but what one other book should I really pay attention to? I've been feeling my connection with my daughter slipping, and the GD has been flying out the window bit by bit as my patience gets shorter and shorter. She is in a very independent stage, which would be great except often her version of independent is dangerous or unacceptable (like hitting the dog or pulling his ears). She is also starting in on a 'no' phase, and all of this is difficult for me since I'm 4 months pregnant and my husband just left for Afghanistan. I think we are fueling each other's fire with harshness, and I want to put a stop to it, as I can see myself getting more and more out of control with the discipline. Obviously, I'm super stressed, and I need to figure out how to deal with that, but I think that reconnecting with her will do me a world of good. We're usually so close.

Sorry, that turned into a novel.

[baileyann3]

I would try "Unconditional Parenting" by Alfie Kohn.

[AileenM]

OK...I'll look for that at the library! Thanks!

[angelandmisha]

Another vote for Unconditional Parenting. It's an excellent book to help you get at what you really want: a loving, connected relationship and it's a very quick read.

And I just want to say thank you to your husband for his service and to you and your children for sacrificing time with him so he can serve his country. It must be hard and scary.

Ingrid

[sapphire_chan]

It depends. If you need to touch base with your parenting ideals, then Unconditional Parenting. If you want exercises on applying those ideals, then Becoming the Parent You Want to Be.

BTPYWTB isn't really geared toward any particular style, but it hits the high points of most of the good parenting books I've read and gives little thought exercises that help close the gap between what you want to do as a parent and what's actually going on.

[sapphire_chan]

On second thought, get the one that comes in an audio format you can play at home.

[AileenM]

OK, thank you so much ladies...I'll look for them both at the library. I'm going tomorrow, today was just too much. I am super proud of myself, though, DD couldn't find one of her shoes this morning, so we didn't make it to church. Instead of getting frazzled like I've been doing lately, I decided not to let it get to me, and that church could wait. Instead I made a game out of looking for the shoe. She was too cute to be angry with!

Ingrid...thanks so much. It is a bit scary, and honestly, I think it's a big reason that I feel so much pressure right now. It's even more reason that I need to connect with DD.

[Moonglow Girl]

Ditto both the books above.

I also really like "Connection Parenting" by Pam Leo. It's short, sweet and concise. Just a few minutes with it help me regroup and recenter.

If you're tired, pregnant and parenting on your own, Connection Parenting would be a great "instant inspriation" bedside book.

Good luck and thank you for your partner's service!