How realistic is it to go back to School...

[tjlucca]

and have another baby. DP and I are both wanting to return to school. DD is going to be four next week and will start preschool some time this year. We have been talking about having another baby....

I would be a part-time student, DP as well. DD is a pretty easy going kid, though she was NOT an easy baby. This is new territory to me. Is this crazy??

[artemis80]

I had DS in grad school, and people thought I was crazy for planning it that way. But I found being a student parent MUCH easier than a full-time working parent. Even full-time school with homework isn't 40+ hours per week, kwim?

[Carita]

Depends on the type of program, school, support situation, and your funding situation (because you may be working as well). I wouldn't count on shared parenting alone to take care of the new one. You may need to have at least PT child care.

But its not toally crazy. I am glad I waited until DH was done with school before I had kids because then we didn't both have those crazy final exam weeks.

[tjlucca]

Thanks Mamas. I think we're going to go for it. We'll take on as much as we can without going crazy and remember to pace ourselves. I think if we wait baby #2 may not come to be. It's time.

[pinksprklybarefoot]

Looks like you made a decision, but what the heck, I'll offer up a perspective anyway.

I just had a baby in July and I started half-time classes this semester. I SAHM and lead my stepdaughter's Brownie troop other than school. DH is not in school, but he works two jobs, and his main job often requires him to put in time on evenings or weekends.

So far, we are making it. The house is a mess, dinners have been less than gourmet, I've been letting the toddler watch a little Thomas the Tank engine, DH and I never see each other, but so far, so good. We're making it work.

I was blessed with a baby who has practically slept through the night since day 1. This helps.

Next semester (when I take 3 classes + study for the PCAT), we will be using some part-time daycare.

HTH.

[LilMomma83]

It's hard, but, doable, especially if you can have kids in daycare/school longer than your class times so you can work on home work easier.

FYI- DH is PT student FT work, I'm FT student PT work...our kids are 2.5yrs and 3mos

[sacredjourney]

One of you may be able to take some online courses as well, increasing the amount of time you get to be at home with baby.

[darcytrue]

I just had a baby and I do all online classes and can honestly say no, I wouldn't do it. I was almost done with college and got pregnant unexpectedly. It's harder than I thought it would be right now finishing up this semester and I'm only taking 1 course. I see nothing wrong with starting back to school and going while pregnant but post partum you may want to plan a break for a while. I plan to take off the next semester or two.

[meemee]

totally depends on your philosophy.

if i had another baby (which is why i did not choose to have another) i KNOW i will want to spend as close to being a SAHM for the first 3 years. so as a student i might take one class a semester for 3 years.

but that's just me. i hate, hate, hate diverting my attention between child and school. i pay too heavy an emotional price so that is not a good option for me.

i would be totally depressed if someone else had to do the majority of caregiving. i have a 7 year old now and am full time and i even now feel guilty for not getting to do all the things i could with my dd. i feel sad there are things I want to do for myself that i cannot do.

so look inside you. how do you feel about being close to your child. how many hours do you wanna be with your baby.

and then go from there. i am the kind of person who is NOT a sahm nor a wohm. i need a bit of both. the first year ft sahm. but after one year maybe a parttime studying mom.

i just returned to school after 6 years. i left when i was pregnant.

i know i have an extreme personality. but oh boy was i releived that i didnt have added stress of other stuff when dd was a baby. i have no regrets at all of missing out those 6 years from school.

[sparklett]

Just wanted to add my experience...

I was in school on-line, working on my second B.S. I got through the first semester (the first part of my pregnancy) with flying colors, then crashed and burned during my second semester. DS came really early and I had to withdraw from classes. I had to repeat all of my classes the following semester or risk failing and loosing my financial aid. I took the classes, got B's and C's (I normally carry a 4.0 GPA) and was REALLY stressed out.

I will likely be in grad school (second master's) when I get pregnant. I plan to be in school during the start of my pregnancy, then withdraw for a year and pick things up again later.

[sacredjourney]

When I suggested online courses, I forgot to specify that taking a few online courses while taking at-school-courses as well, can help you and dp arrange your schedules so that one of you is always home. If you're both determined to go to school, I think that is beneficial for you and your family, and that it won't cause your relationship with LO to compromised. Just make sure to keep up your health and your energy as much as possible, so that you are fully present each day. Maybe try it out for a semester and see how it goes. You could also try taking turns going to school. For instance you get your degree first, and then dp, or vice versa. Good luck!

[mrsfrenchy]

I love being a student momma and as someone else said i think it's easier than being a working momma. I've managed to keep a 3.8 GPA and I take a pretty heavy load each semester (next semester will be might lightest ever--only 12 credits--because I'm due the first week of the semester. but its really hard to resist signing up for another class).

Some weeks get stressful (for example right now, I have a term paper due in two weeks, so I've been up late a lot...and just about the time I get done with homework, my 15 month old wakes up), but I really don't mind it. I'm happy to be in school, I enjoy the intellectual stimulation, DD gets to play with other kids at daycare(and it's really hard to find playgroups in this area, so that's awesome), and I get to work towards a career that I really care about.

I wouldn't do it differently....the only thing I wish is that I could make some money so that DH could quit his (horrible) job and take a paycut to a less stressful job. ...but that will come in time.