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16 year old caught smoking pot by the cops... - Page 5

post #81 of 96
I think you should buy some seeds from a reputable dealer, set up a safe indoor growing area and grow your own marijuana. When the plants are ready to cultivate, teach her the correct method for rolling joints and join her for some mother-daughter bonding time safe in the confines of your own home.

(of course, only do this when the younger kids aren't home)
post #82 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by MariaMadly View Post
First off, I'm pro-legalization. I think it's vital that the girl be aware of all the possible systemic consequences regarding a criminal record, impact on school admissions or hiring, etc. But I also think the part about knowing who you're with is important on many levels. "Good company" doesn't just mean people who won't touch the stuff, or merely won't rat you out if you do. It matters more that she's among friends, or in a safe situation herself, when she's in a vulnerable state -- maybe even with one person not using depending on the circumstances. Looking after one another is never a bad idea, and it looks as though the mom's approach (from what I read) seems to omit concern for her daughter in this regard completely.
I agree with this entire post. I think because the mom in the OP came down so hard on her daughter, the next time the daughter smokes ('cuz more likely than not, she will) the only lesson the daughter will have learned is to cover it up better. That makes me think of shady people and shady circumstances.

My parents were open and honest with me about their drug experiences, and the biggest lesson I learned was to make smart decisions. Be in a safe place. Be with people who will take care of you, and people you will take care of. Make sure someone is aware enough to make good choices. Be aware of the benefits versus the risks. (Yeah it would be fun to be high right now, but I'm in a public place/with people I don't know/not sure where this weed came from/have a test tomorrow/etc.)


Just for giggles, I called and asked my mom about it. Her quote, "You were a good kid. You were in the IB program, in sports, in clubs. You were respectful, and kept your room clean. You visited your grandparents several times a week. You volunteered. Man, I would have needed a joint or two to relax from all that. Now, if you were some little smart a-- who was failing out of school and in general being a big jerk, it would have been totally different."

Hmm. No wonder that I could/did/and still do talk to my mom about everything in an open and honest manner.
post #83 of 96
I heard a news story about a dad who found his 16 y.o.'s closet locked. So curious he barged in there, found a mj plant and called the police on HER.

Most ppl here thought he should have just gotten rid of the plant. Heard this on the radio. What do you all think? My dad would have taken the plant and built a greenhouse. So I'm trying to understand calling the police on your own teen.
post #84 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by Labbemama View Post
I heard a news story about a dad who found his 16 y.o.'s closet locked. So curious he barged in there, found a mj plant and called the police on HER.

Most ppl here thought he should have just gotten rid of the plant. Heard this on the radio. What do you all think? My dad would have taken the plant and built a greenhouse. So I'm trying to understand calling the police on your own teen.
My mom called the cops on my little brother when she found a small amount of pot in his room. She's a very "follow the law because it's the law" kind of person. She also excuses the cops for nearly killing my stepbrother over a baggie of weed. In her mind, he deserved it because he did drugs.
Her mentality is dangerous, and not one that I share. We're not close, and I don't think I'll ever forgive her for taking the side of dumb laws over her children's health and safety.
post #85 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by Labbemama View Post
I heard a news story about a dad who found his 16 y.o.'s closet locked. So curious he barged in there, found a mj plant and called the police on HER.

Most ppl here thought he should have just gotten rid of the plant. Heard this on the radio. What do you all think? My dad would have taken the plant and built a greenhouse. So I'm trying to understand calling the police on your own teen.
I'd say that's a huge over-reaction. How about talking? How about opening a dialog? How about being a family? If you have serious issues why not TALK. It's like equating pot with murdering someone just because they both have some sort of law-related punishment.
post #86 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by littleteapot View Post
I'd say that's a huge over-reaction. How about talking? How about opening a dialog? How about being a family? If you have serious issues why not TALK. It's like equating pot with murdering someone just because they both have some sort of law-related punishment.
Some people feel that way however. I find it amazing the number of people who think pot is as bad as heroine.
post #87 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by Labbemama View Post
I heard a news story about a dad who found his 16 y.o.'s closet locked. So curious he barged in there, found a mj plant and called the police on HER.

Most ppl here thought he should have just gotten rid of the plant. Heard this on the radio. What do you all think? My dad would have taken the plant and built a greenhouse. So I'm trying to understand calling the police on your own teen.
Your dad and my dad should go out and tend the weeds together... Mind probably would have done the same thing.
post #88 of 96
I am pretty sure my mom wouldn't have called the cops on me because she would have been terrified of CPS taking me away. I think she would have contemplated it, though...
post #89 of 96
DH's mother is exactly the kind of person who would call the cops on her son..I think she did once when it was related to alcohol and he was underage. Then again it isn't surprising since he went to court and got legally emancipated at the age of 16 so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

My mom would have grounded me for a month all the while not knowing I would smoke during lunch breaks at school!

I wouldn't want to tear the plant up but I think at some point until my kid is 18 I have to draw the line. As an adult you can also get in quite a bit of trouble for something like that around your minor child. Growing is very different in the eyes of the law from just possessing MJ.
post #90 of 96
My adopted dad let my sister go nuts trying to find her stash in the room. They always told us they flushed it and made a big deal about how their house could be seized but I really think they smoked it.
post #91 of 96

pot smoking

As a mom of 2 teenage boys; 15 & 17 and an 11yo daughter, we have had plenty of discussion about the use and misuse of using drugs and alcohol. Both my boys have tried pot and really liked it. Especially my 15yo, to the point that he was called out as a burn out, ostracized by his friends and spent the summer alone, all by his own doing. It was heartbreaking to watch. He has been grounded, cut off from the computer, cell phone, forget giving him money and none of it really made a difference to him until he came to the decision to not smoke pot. Lots of tears ( mine and his) and today we are in a good place. Hopefully he can stay strong enough to keep on saying no. Rather than call these kids out as bad, maybe we, as parents need to stop and think about the words we are putting out and how they not only will affect the child using the drugs but thier families as well.
post #92 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
You can dislike it all you want. But please don't use discredited theories to justify it. There are decent enough ligitimate reasons to not approve of pot that you don't really need to tout the "reefer madness" bull.

I get fed up with all of that.

post #93 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by deny_zoo29 View Post
I have to mostly agree here! Why is pot NOT a big deal?! Whether or not you personally feel it is right or not, it is ILLEGAL in the U.S.! So your child should not be allowed to do it! Period.
If your teen broke some other law would you be just as lenient?
Thanks for your post!
post #94 of 96
I'd feel the same way as if my kid were caught drinking by the cops, since imo, it is very comparable. I would not be happy, and I would definitely putting some restrictions on my child. Like my parents told me- wait til your brain is finished growing before you start killing your braincells.
post #95 of 96
I would largely do what Dar said too.

I would have a hard time trusting her. And I would probably follow up on a lot of her activities for a while. She would need to make sure she was where she said she was.

I would make sure she knew I didn't trust her. Not sure about this kid, but my kids would be very upset that I would not be able to trust them.

Yeah - I would be checking up and checking out the friends....
post #96 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2xy View Post
There is a law in Wyoming that prohibits one from photographing a rabbit from January-April. Still on the books, from what I understand.
OMG...
Really???



OOPS!!!
There are tons here and photography is one of my hobbies what the heck are they expecting??? LOL!!!

Going back to the topic, I wouldn't make a fuss if Addie decides she wants to smoke pot I wouldn't give it a fuss. I rather have her smoke pot than doing cocaine on weekends or drinking alcohol (which is worse than mj).
Now why isn't alcohol illegal if its worse??

Yes at 16 is young to start smoking mj, but I rather have my very rebel teenager smoking mj than drinking alcohol and getting wasted.
Call me a bad parent whatever.
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