Following through on consequences UPDATE post 6

[KatWrangler]

So the 3 1/2 year old and the 5 1/2 year old got into it on the couch this morning next to me. They were fighting over the blanket. Anyhow the 3 1/2 year old decides to poke her brother in the eye (not the first time this has happened).

Deal was we were going to the Magic House today. Because we love it and because its free (DH unemployed...we are on assistance etc.). Just something fun to do. Which I desperately have been wanting to do.

Do you think the consquence (which is what I have stated after the incident) should be not taking her to the Magic House today? It means I will be stuck home with her and the 17th month old while DH takes 5 1/2 year old out.

Sigh....or am I over reacting?

[Tjej]

I think that if you want to go to the Magic House, you can figure out a different appropriate consequence, and talk to her about the fact that you have changed your mind and decided that X would be more appropriate (perhaps having her apologize to DS and having her help him with something).

Tjej

[elizawill]

Originally Posted by KatWrangler

Do you think the consquence (which is what I have stated after the incident) should be not taking her to the Magic House today? It means I will be stuck home with her and the 17th month old while DH takes 5 1/2 year old out.

for my family, i probably would not take away the activity planned for the day based on what you've shared here. i agree that purposefully poking their sibling in the eye is not okay & i would deal with that for sure. however, cancelling the whole day isn't how i'd resolve it (based on what you've shared).

i hope it works out for you all & you're able to get out and have some fun!

hugs.

[KatWrangler]

DD1 is high maintence child. She whines and screams and throws herself on the floor if she doesn't get what she wants. Or she won't tell us in words what she wants. But instead continues to whine and cry about it. This child can talk and talks very clearly. More clearly than my 5 1/2 year old. So its not like she can't pronounce the words.

Hubby already left with DS. So we are stuck at home (we only have one car). Then they are going out to my ILs to pick up our laundry detergent (we have like 6 loads of laundry that need to be done over at the laundry center).

Then DS is off school tomorrow but I have to go with DH to a pysch appointment with his Therapist (they want to discuss his therapy). Gee thats going to stress free.

So another suck*ass weekend. I have had it with DD1 and today was the last straw that has thrown me over the edge.

[LynnS6]

Next time, take the kids to the Magic House. A 5 minutes separation from her victim and a sincere hug/apology is all I expect in this situation.

She's 3 1/2. Impulse control is a tenuous thing at this age. Very. Also, when a 3 1/2 year old is upset, it's VERY difficult for them to use their words. They don't have the cognitive control sometimes to be able to control both the emotion (which is overwhelming) and the words. That's why the mantra of every preschool teacher I know is "use your words". It takes several years to get that. I've got possibly the world's most articulate 5 year old. And even she can't always use her words.

How about you pop in a movie or a tv show, pop some popcorn and relax before going to get the laundry detergent? Go for a walk to get out of the house?

If you read the threads 3 to 3 1/2 year olds take up a LOT of board space here. Really. I think that when each of my children were 3, I was ready to put them on the curb at least once. They're HARD WORK. Life does get better after 3.

[KatWrangler]

Update

Thank you all advice. I need it.

Well the update is, they are already headed to my ILs to pick up the detergent. Apparently Conner is sick. He complained a little bit about a stomach ache this morning, but I kind of about it. He was not to motivated/excited at the Magic House (eventhough thats all he has talked about since Friday). In fact my husband said he is already asleep in the car. So not like him.

What worries me is we got an automatic call yesterday from his school that a school employee has tested positive for H1N1. But supposedly they were not at school when they were running a fever.

Off to check the symptoms of H1N1.

What a bust of a weekend.

[OGirlieMama]

Ugh, I hope he doesn't get H1N1 and that it's just a random bad tummy.

I agree with Lynn about not taking away the Magic House trip altogether, especially since it ended up putting you in a bummer of a place, too (that is in the alternate universe where DS and your husband actually went there). But I agree especially about 3-year-olds taking up most of this board, and occasionally wanting to put them out with the recycling (not the trash - I have a heart!)