how long did it take you to get pregnant?

[abbysgirl]

For those of you who got pregnant using fresh sperm & inseminating at home: I am wondering how many tries it took you. I'm going to be starting inseminations next month and I know there is no way to predict how long it will take to get pregnant, but I would love to hear from other folks how long it took them. Thanks!
Erin

[caro113]

So you're doing self insemination? There are a few websites you can go to - just google it.

One thing I learned on here, when I was asking about it, is that it helps if you have an orgasm when you inseminate. When you are having sex, and thus, getting aroused, something opens (I think your cervix? I'm not entirely sure) and it helps get more sperm inside.

There is one mama on here I know has tried it. I'm sure she'll respond to you and tell you her story. It's quite fascinating.

Good Luck!!

[MujerMamaMismo]

Two tries per cycle for 6 cycles.

Felt like an eternity but it was, of course, a perfectly average amount of time.

Good luck. It's so worth it!

[KSDoulaMama]

First cycle: we tried with washed frozen sperm and one IUI, didn't work.
Second cycle: fresh sperm with one at-home insemination didn't work.
Took a month off.
Third active cycle: fresh sperm with three at-home inseminations I got knocked up.

So... three cycles, but only two cycles trying with the fresh sperm.

[FtMPapa]

I type this somewhat dryly and quite bitterly - if you search, you'll find this exact same thread from...six months ago or so? Not sure. I happened to spot it yesterday while looking for info on something else.

Anyway, at that time, I said something like I was heading into my seventh cycle with my first known donor with fresh sperm, after two clinic tries with u/s and b/w and one at home try with anonymous frozen sperm. In the intervening time, I tried several more times with KD 1, took two cycles off for travel and think-time (now that felt like eternity!) and I've tried once with KD 2 and we're on our second cycle.

I'm now seeking the assistance of Fertility Clinic # 2, and their assistance has been less than helpful so far.

You can count, I refuse to anymore, but that's gotta be close to twenty cycles - one possibly ectopic possible early m/c my first cycle, one possible m/c a few months ago, and that's it. No sticky beans.

If you're trying to get a sense of how long it will take, prepare yourself to see that BFP anywhere from two weeks after your first attempt to never, but realistically, on the queer TTC thread, my guess is that about half of folks conceive within three attempts, and 75% within six attempts, and 90% within ten. I'm totally ballparking those numbers, but about half will end in miscarriage. The m/c rate seems higher for queers and others intentionally (and obsessively!) TTC because we're more likely to notice and talk about it.

[Lyndzies]

Originally Posted by FtMPapa

The m/c rate seems higher for queers and others intentionally (and obsessively!) TTC because we're more likely to notice and talk about it.

I was thinking this, exactly, as I was reading through your post.

I hope your stay here is short.... but I've got nothing uber positive to add (yet) unfortunately. We've been charting 7 cycles, inseminating for 4 (3 of which were timed properly) and nothing to show yet (except for one early m/c). The reason we're only inseming about half of the cycles we should be is just because of some of the logistics involved w/ using a KD and being a queer couple TTC. We don't have unlimited access to sperm.

Hoping for some good news in the coming days, so hopefully I'll be back here proclaiming some awesomeness soon. :-)

Of course, there are plenty others who have success stories, and I'm sure if you browse around, you'll find MANY of them!

Good luck to you.

[carmen358]

Try #1 - got pregnant but suspect chemical pregnancy (faint BFP & late period).
Try #2 - got pregnant but miscarriage at 9.5wks (no reason found)
Try #3 - got pregnant but miscarriage at 5wks (no reason found)
Try #4 - BFN
Try #5 - BFN
Try #6 - BFN
Try #7 - BFP and currently 29wks pregnant

[cejae]

Took DP 9 cycles (at least 2 insms per cycle, sometimes ICI and sometimes IUI). No medical problems save for a stenotic cervix.

I'm currently on cycle 10. Sigh. 1 round of fresh sperm, the rest have been IUI or ICI. No medical issues save for an endometrioma on my right ovary. Just started trigger/femara/follicle monitoring this past cycle.

[FarmerFemme]

Such a difficult question. We are so much more than statistics and though we compare ourselves to others' experiences, it's so individual.

I tried for 7 cycles with 3 different KDs. Each time we had a new KD, we had to do all the SDE screening and get new contracts. For 4 of the cycles, I used acupuncture, had an RE, took Clomid, estrogen, trigger shot, and progesterone. I did between 2 and 4 inseminations, well timed, each cycle. I have no known fertility issues and thought that with the interventions, I would have a better chance of conceiving. No such luck.

What worked for me? I left my marriage. My ex was less and less interested in starting a family with me and I became secure trying to do it myself. I started eating a Real Food diet, cut out all soy, and dumped my doctors.

My first time trying again (with a new DP btw), I charted, peed on opks, and had a few great orgasms each time we inseminated. Three well timed insems, every other day, the last on the day of ovulation. I kept my hips up for 30 minutes after each one and watched Murder She Wrote.

It worked.

Seriously? There is no rhyme or reason to ttc. It can be heartbreaking and full of hope. Often both at the same time. Each person has such a different experience and as hard as each BFN was, it wasn't the right time for me, even though I wanted it to be more than anything.

Best of luck to you and everyone ttc. May your time be short. xo

[FtMPapa]

Warning: Thread Hijack!

Farmer Femme - how did you get the RE to work with you with a KD? Did you lie, sign a waiver? Please let me in on the secret! My clinic is putting me through hell and back.

[quasar]

Try #1: 2 frozen ICI units at home: BFN
Try #2: 2 frozen ICI units at home: BFN
Try #3: 1 frozen IUI unit, did ICI at home: BFN
Took a month off and had the most perfect cycle...
Try #4: 1 Frozen IUI through midwife, 1 IUI at home: delayed ovulation, BFN
Try #5: 2 frozen IUI units at home using same donor as try #4 (previous tries had been all different donors): BFP and the most wonderful little boy in the world.

[boolery]

Try #1: 2 IUIs - BFN
Try #2: 1 ICI and 2 IUIs - BFP (miscarriage at 5 weeks)
Try #3: 2 IUIs -BFN
Try #4: 1 ICI and 2 IUIs - BFP (currently 9 weeks pregnant)

All of our inseminations were unmedicated and performed at home.
We used frozen sperm.

Good luck to you!

[danjelle]

I tried 4 times, doing one insemination each time. At this point my cycle was really regular - every 27days. I'm still not sure whether this was because I'd just come off birth control pills (helps keep my skin pimple free) or not.

I was disheartened and needed a break for self care so I took about 6 months off. During this time I became a lot more knowledgable about things like cervical mucus - I didn't know any of this previously. I now keep an eye on that and use OPKs (which are a bit confusing anyway).

I'm currently on try 8 now. On try 5 and 6 I inseminated once, try 7 I inseminated twice, and just this time I inseminated 3 times. Currently in the 2ww. I'm trying to not be defeated, but it's hard not to. I met so many people who get pregnant first pop so with a bit of luck this might be your experience.

[simcon]

A search would really turn up quite a few threads like these, with lots of info!

For us:

Pregnancy #1: 2nd try (known donor, at-home)
Pregnancy #2: 1st try (known donor, at-home, m/c @ 12 weeks)
Pregnancy #3: Aaaah, something like 15th or 16th try? (known donor, combo of fresh and frozen, acupuncture, Clomid, trigger shots, ultrasound monitoring, lots of plane trips, etc.--way too depressing to keep count of the months or expenses...)

So, yeah, I think the average has worked out to about 6-7 months for me for each pregnancy (which says a lot about the variations of individual experiences!).

[FarmerFemme]

Originally Posted by FtMPapa

Farmer Femme - how did you get the RE to work with you with a KD? Did you lie, sign a waiver? Please let me in on the secret! My clinic is putting me through hell and back.

It's illegal actually for an RE to do inseminations here in Idaho on an woman without her "husband's concent" and illegal for me to self-inseminate without medical guidance. I freaked out for a long time about the law and found I would have the hardest time ever doing IUI with my KD or going with frozen sperm. In the end, I just went to the RE consult alone and asked if he could help me get pregnant; that I would be conceiving on my own, but needed some assistance with hormones and monitoring. He agreed, luckily. (Also to note: my insurance didn't pay a dime, so he was paid oop at the inflated rate. Not bad incentive.) So we just did ICI at home with all that the RE could do otherwise. He gave me the meds and did my ultrasounds to check follicles and trigger. It was a don't ask - don't tell situation. Not fair or helpful in terms of trying to achieve equal reproductive rights, but I wasn't going to lose the help I had, however it came.

Hope that helps! I'm so sorry your clinic is giving you a hard time. Let me know how it goes!

[FtMPapa]

Farmer Femme - wow, the law is that restrictive? That's ridiculous.

My clinic is actually worse than that. She wouldn't even do cycle monitoring with me doing insems at home / getting IUI with someone else / whatever.

I'm now fighting them on EVERYTHING, so I'm not going to back down on the donor issue. Thanks for hte info!

[MujerMamaMismo]

Thought i'd add that we used fresh sperm and no meds for all cycles including the one that resulted in the giant squirmy boy currently trying to eat my laptop.

[elismum1908]

The first time around it took 8 tries spaced over 2.5 years and more donors than I can count. In the end it worked on my 2nd clomid/IUI cycle with a new frozen donor.

Second time around it worked the first try. clomid/IUI/same donor as DS.

[Deker]

I tried D-IUI with clomid and injectibles four times and didn't get pregnant. On the third IUI I got a chemical pregnancy. I love my RE because he is very helpful in presenting the facts and letting me make my own decisions. However, don't let my stats scare you. I have fertility issues and I'm going probably going to start IVF in Jan. or Feb.

FTMPapa, if you hate your RE I highly suggest you get a new one. Having a good RE that you like will make your cycling MUCH more pleasant.

[whoabethy]

this may be TMI, but...

we used fresh sperm from a KD and did the insemination at home. i had been temping, testing CM and using a saliva microscope.

Cycle 1: 3 tries 3 days in a row. DTD and DP put it in after i "finished". 2 days after we got home (KD lives out of town) my temp spiked. we tried too early in the cycle.

Cycle 2: 3 tries 3 days in a row. KD had been "fasting" for 3 days before try #1. This time DP put it in right before i "finished". i don't know if that made a difference, but i got my BFP 10 days later.

hope this helps!

-beth