I have been getting increasingly frustrated with DD(5) not listening to us, or I suppose I should say not doing what we ask. Generally it's little things like not putting shoes on, not helping tidy up at the end of the day etc.
I have been feeling like these sort of things are best handled playfully, and certainly we are there joining in with tidying on so on. I don't think we are expecting too much of her. However I have reached my limit, and no longer feel playful. I would just like things to happen without my having to ask several times.
So we have started a "marble jar". She has started the week with 10 marbles and we will give marbles for being helpful,etc and remove marbles when she does not do as she is asked. If she has 25 marbles on Saturday we will have a treat (not sure what yet)
We have only been doing this for a day and I'm already unsure how I feel about it. On the plus side I felt I stayed much calmer this morning when she did not get dressed. I gave a couple of chances, warned her that if she did not get dressed I would remove a marble (which I had to do). She then got dressed immediately. There was non of the anger (by either of us) that we have had for a few weeks.
On the down side I don't like the everything must have a reward feeling. I'm also not sure that in the long run me imposing such a random consequence is helpful. But then being late for school everyday doesn't seem such a good option either.
What do you think, is it a good idea short term? long term? and does anyone have any other suggestions for me.
I think we will carry this on for at least this week and see how we all feel about it at the end.
I have been feeling like these sort of things are best handled playfully, and certainly we are there joining in with tidying on so on. I don't think we are expecting too much of her. However I have reached my limit, and no longer feel playful. I would just like things to happen without my having to ask several times.
So we have started a "marble jar". She has started the week with 10 marbles and we will give marbles for being helpful,etc and remove marbles when she does not do as she is asked. If she has 25 marbles on Saturday we will have a treat (not sure what yet)
We have only been doing this for a day and I'm already unsure how I feel about it. On the plus side I felt I stayed much calmer this morning when she did not get dressed. I gave a couple of chances, warned her that if she did not get dressed I would remove a marble (which I had to do). She then got dressed immediately. There was non of the anger (by either of us) that we have had for a few weeks.
On the down side I don't like the everything must have a reward feeling. I'm also not sure that in the long run me imposing such a random consequence is helpful. But then being late for school everyday doesn't seem such a good option either.
What do you think, is it a good idea short term? long term? and does anyone have any other suggestions for me.
I think we will carry this on for at least this week and see how we all feel about it at the end.
