safe co-sleeping advice - positions?

[joyakshi]

My baby is a week old. We bought an Arm's Reach co-sleeper so she could be right by the bed but not in the bed, but she won't sleep in it until after I feed her and let her fall asleep on my belly. Then we only get about an hour before she wakes up fussing again. If she sleeps on me, she can stay asleep all night.

I am realizing I have to share the bed with her part of the night, and want to find out how to do it most safely. I'll still put her in the co-sleeper once she's really asleep, but for the hours she's in bed with me, I could use some advice.
She likes sleeping on her side or back across my belly/chest area. I am still sleeping in a semi-reclined position so I don't roll around at night, and my elbows are supported by small pillows so I don't drop her.
She also likes sleeping in the crook of my elbow next to me on the mattress.
Are there other, safer positions? Do I need to not use a blanket for myself? Should she be between me & DH or on the outside of me?
She is able to roll onto her side from her back already, even in a swaddleme.

Thanks in advance for any help.

[Amatullah0]

why dont you keep her on your chest? in the early days, thats the only way i could rest.

[CarricksMom]

My DS liked the crook of my arm, too. I was also worried about safety, but I found that his least little move would wake me up. As a new mom, I slept very lightly and seemed to be very aware of not rolling on him. He slept on both sides of me, both between me and DH and the other (co-sleeper) side. I did not use blankets, except on my feet. Just dressed warmer. It helps if you and DH have separate blankets so it doesn't get pulled over her when she's in the middle.

[Frankie'sMom]

We co-sleep too. Usually for the first half of the night, our son is in his crib, but then I nurse him at night and inevitably fall asleep so he stays in the bed the rest of the night. For the first few weeks we "slept" with him on our chests. My husband would sleep with him on the couch and I would take the bed so I could get some real sleep. As he got bigger, next to us on the bed. He's always been a belly sleeper, too, and now that he can flip over, if we put him on his back he just goes right to the belly.

Our pediatrician recommended that we position him between the wall and myself, since a nursing mom is going to sleep lighter than a man in the bed, and she was concerned that it was possible my husband might roll over on to the baby. I really don't think that's going to happen, but it makes sense, so that's what we do. My husband works crazy hours sometimes and because of it can go 40 hours without sleeping and so when he does sleep I think he gets into a really deep sleep and I don't want to risk anything. I put a pillow between the bed and the wall to plug up the gap. I have to re-position my son when we're sleeping too for nursing from different sides.

ETA -- we do have a blanket on the bed and sometimes baby is covered but only up to his waist.

You'll probably find what works for you as your baby gets bigger. Once they have more head control and aren't like floppy little muppets, they're easier to sleep with. Night laying-down nursing is also way easier when they're just a little bit stronger.

[GoGoGirl]

I never figured out how to sleep with DD on my chest, but it sounds so cozy! When DD was tiny, I slept on my side, curled around her. Her head was at boob level, my bottom arm was above her head, and my knees were bent up to her feet. My mom had a good point--if you're curled up like that, you literally can't roll onto the baby.

I switched DD from my right to my left all night, as we alternated boobs that we were nursing on. (I finally learned to nurse from my top boob, so now we don't have to move around and we get more sleep!) So sometimes she was between me and the edge of the bed, and sometimes between me and my husband. When she was between me and DH, we put a bolster between DD and DH, kind of as a reminder to him to not roll over. He never did--although now that DD is older he's not as careful--I've seen him accidentally knee her or clonk her on the head with his arm.

When DD was tiny, I pulled the comforter only up to my thighs (I was so cautious!) and just wore really warm tops. The blanket didn't cover DD at all--we put a baby blanket on her. I ended up cutting boob-slots in my pajama shirts, because my back and stomach kept getting cold when I had to pull them up to nurse.

[handsandfeet]

I also kind of curled around DS when he was tiny, but I would keep him propped up a bit on my bottom arm b/c he refluxed a lot. DH was always amazed at how I was frozen the whole time -- never moved -- I guess out of instinct to not roll onto the baby. I couldn't side-lying nurse when he was that small, so I always kept him on the outside of me, away from DH (a heavy sleeper), and sat up to nurse each time. I used a light blanket only over my legs, and would dress warmly with a nursing tank top and then a cardigan sweater on top.

[mlh]

I co slept and am still co sleeping with my 2 yr old from birth. I would say do what works best for everyone. Make sure everyone is comfortable and everything will be just fine.

It depends on how your dh sleeps on if you would feel safer if baby is in between you both or between you and the wall. I would bf dd while lying on my side so would switch from side to side through out the night (she would some times be in between us and other times between me and the wall).

I would say just be smart about it. Do what feels right and everything will be just fine!

[AislinCarys]

We felt safest with DD between us when she was tiny. We pushed our pillows out to the edges, leaving a big space in the middle, where we placed a wool underlay with a large flat diaper on top. DD therefore slept a bit higher up than we did. If we could afford it we should have bought separate duvets, instead we kept the duvet down around our waists - way below DD. DD had her own blanket, and I used a cotblanket over my upper body. We were both very aware of her, always woke before she did, every little sound, every movement from her.

I would feed her, then move back to my space, once I could breastfeed side-lying.