or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Archives › Pregnancy and Birth Archives › Due Date Clubs 2009 - 2012 › February 2010 › Weekly chat thread Oct 26- Nov 2nd
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Weekly chat thread Oct 26- Nov 2nd

post #1 of 85
Thread Starter 
Another week. How is everyone doing?

AFM, I am feeling happy because I have finally felt my baby wiggling for the last three nights in a row! And it was like nothing else I ever felt. And last night it happened while DH and I were watching a movie so I had dh put his hand on the spot and he felt some light kicks or wiggles too. SO that is great and reassuring.

Another thing I am having is night time insomnia. I am not sure if this is pregnancy related. I do like to sleep really late in the day when I can- but when I lie to sleep at night, even if I have woken up early and had a busy day, I find it really hard to go to sleep. Is this a pregnancy thing? I have no idea but it is annoying
Off to go babysit a 2 year old now. Have a good day everyone..
post #2 of 85
The girls are moving so much you can see my tummy ripple. Its rather amusing.

Insomnia I've had for awhile. I can't get comfortable. I am bigger (I'm all all ALL belly) and the kicking just keeps me awake.

Heading to the hospital today for a few days. Steroid shots, an ultrasound, and some non stress tests. I last had an u/s three weeks ago, and my cervix was very VERY short...which is why I am now out of work and on bed rest. I'm hoping it hasn't changed and I'm not dilating. If I'm dilating, I could end up in the hospital for the duration of this pregnancy...

Sigh. At least my husband works at the hospital I go to. He can join me for lunch. And he's going to bring my son with him in the evening to have dinner with me.

Will keep updated. They have free WiFi.
post #3 of 85
I am now 26 weeks and 2 days! WOW!!! It's amazing how fast this thing is going. Right now I am stressing about my MIL and her 2 year old baby coming to visit for the birth. She will be flying from the states and staying an indefinite amount of time. She always asks me to be honest with her but when I tell her that I would rather her come later then sooner (I kinda wanted it to be just me and DH at the birth, not her and her baby too!) she started crying and told me not to cause so much drama. She desperately wants to be here, her first grandchild, after all. Her baby was an "oops I thought I was menopausal" baby so I just feel like having him here will take away from my own baby. I know that is silly. UGH. Anyways, my mom is coming too but hasn't bought her tickets either and I just really like things to be definite. My DH will have to drive two hours to munich to pick them up and I would rather he not do it two different times during the weeks that I will be "ready to labor". I am just frustrated. A houseful of guests is NOT how I envisioned my first baby being here.
post #4 of 85
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauren31 View Post
I am now 26 weeks and 2 days! WOW!!! It's amazing how fast this thing is going.
Wait - how are you 26 weeks and 2 days and due after me? I'm due Feb 4th and won't be 26 weeks until Thursday...


Once again, nothing very useful to say. I'm getting the strong impression that I'm not "crunchy" enough for this board, so don't have a lot to say these days. Pregnancy-wise I'm just in a holding pattern here - baby is moving a lot, sometimes to the point of it being painful. I suppose it doesn't help any that he is probably measuring closer to 28 weeks at this point than 26...dealing with fatigue - doesn't seem to matter how much I sleep, but I still feel exhausted when I get up. My iron is normally good, so I don't think it's that, but they will double check it when I do the glucose test next week...
post #5 of 85
Ugh, Lauren, that is frustrating. I don't know the dynamics of your family, but if it were me I'd be more bothered by having my MIL hanging around my house while I was postpartum, and less worried about the 2-year-old, who might actually provide some necessary disctraction, since all your little one is actually going to want to do is nurse. If MIL has her hands full of her own kid, maybe she'll be less bothered by the fact that you're going to need to be the one holding yours most of the time.

Katie, so glad you're feeling movement!

I'm also dealing with a little insomnia, but it's more like when I've gotten up to pee for the zillionth time I just don't go back to sleep as easily--I lay there for a while, not as tired as I was a few hours ago, but still equally uncomfortable. Ick.
post #6 of 85
Quote:
Originally Posted by NicoleS View Post
Wait - how are you 26 weeks and 2 days and due after me? I'm due Feb 4th and won't be 26 weeks until Thursday...
.
oh crap, your right... I am 25 weeks and 2 days
post #7 of 85
Quote:
Originally Posted by NicoleS View Post

Once again, nothing very useful to say. I'm getting the strong impression that I'm not "crunchy" enough for this board, so don't have a lot to say these days.
What gives you that impression???
post #8 of 85
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauren31 View Post
What gives you that impression???
Just some of the threads being started lately - we don't cosleep, we don't CD, the thought of eating my placenta makes me shudder (no offense intended to someone who wants to do it, just not my thing), I'm using a regular old OB and birthing in a hospital and happy about it - heck, I already know I won't even be able to BF past 3-6 months.

Plus part of it is probably hormones, but I feel like I don't "fit in" on any of my forums lately - On my more "mainstream" board I'm catching a lot of flack over not vaccinating for H1N1 from the "mainstream" mommies, but then also catching flack from the lactavist/AP mommies because I told moms in my DDC that giving formula does not equal poisoning your child. I just hate, Hate, HATE to see moms be made to feel bad because of a parenting decision they want or have to make. I guess in "crunchy" terms I'd be "sprinkled with granola" and my "soggy" parts are frequently at war with my "crunchy" ones so I don't mesh well with either group.
post #9 of 85
Quote:
Originally Posted by NicoleS View Post
Just some of the threads being started lately - we don't cosleep, we don't CD, the thought of eating my placenta makes me shudder (no offense intended to someone who wants to do it, just not my thing), I'm using a regular old OB and birthing in a hospital and happy about it - heck, I already know I won't even be able to BF past 3-6 months.

Plus part of it is probably hormones, but I feel like I don't "fit in" on any of my forums lately - On my more "mainstream" board I'm catching a lot of flack over not vaccinating for H1N1 from the "mainstream" mommies, but then also catching flack from the lactavist/AP mommies because I told moms in my DDC that giving formula does not equal poisoning your child. I just hate, Hate, HATE to see moms be made to feel bad because of a parenting decision they want or have to make. I guess in "crunchy" terms I'd be "sprinkled with granola" and my "soggy" parts are frequently at war with my "crunchy" ones so I don't mesh well with either group.
I hope everyone can just be themselves (or their normal internet-selves, really), and if someone else doesn't like it, tough titties.
post #10 of 85
I agree that all of us women are very different and value different things. If you feel badly about something maybe it's because you feel guilty about it? I am not sure, usually that is my problem. Maybe you know that you WANT to breastfeed but know that it would be nearly impossible to pump that much while working or doing what you need to do. We all have different problems and different lives, don't let people bother you. Most women who attack your choices probably aren't very confident themselves. After all, bullies are usually hiding behind something, right?
post #11 of 85
NicoleS -- I feel much the same way as you (see what I just posted on the placenta thread...) I don't have a lot to say on many of the issues raised. I've wondered if it's because I work full time and have 2 kids so don't have much time to think about a lot of what's going on inside me...I am completely not ready for this baby!

I don't understand half the acronyms used, because I am a very rare message boarder -- what is CD anyway?!

I have had a second u/s this morning. Four weeks ago they said the fluid levels were low (10.4 cm, what the heck is that for a volume unit?) but today they were up at 14cm ("average" is 12cm). The want me to go back again in 4 weeks to check on the baby's growth as he/she is currently only in the 20%-ile. I tried to tell them I have small babies (my girls were just under 7lbs and right on 7lbs) and I am not worried, but because of my "advanced maternal age" they want me to go back. Oh well, at least I got some gorgeous little profile shots to show my girls tonight. They are so excited about this baby.
post #12 of 85
Hmmm....don't feel like I have too much to add to the convo this week! I can't believe how quickly this pregnancy is going! I feel like I'm starting to retain water again which starts making the weight load on...which I dread. Trying to keep super hydrated, but it doesn't seem to help. I really dont' want to be induced like I was last time, so I'm really hoping all this water retention chills out some!

Lauren--I don't know what the relationship with your MIL is like or what she's like, but I will be praying that that all works out. Obviously you're so far away to stay for a day would be silly, but I hope it doesn't take too much out of you. I don't really like having too many visitors post-partum, no matter how great our relationship is!

Katie--so glad you're finally feeling movement! how amazing, huh?? And insomnia has left me for now, but I'm sure it will soon return!

Zevy--how miraculous having two precious ones growing inside you! I pray that all goes well at your next visit. I had to be in the hospital for a week+ before delivering, I can't imagine months. How soon can you safely deliver?

NicoleS--your comments make me sad! I think you fit in perfectly. There is no "perfectly crunchy" mama. We are each only doing the best we can and I believe you're doing a great job! I've agreed with you a lot: ultrasounds, testing, etc! Keep talking!
post #13 of 85
I hear you all on the insomnia! It doesn't help that I have a 17 month old who still doesn't sleep through the night, resists naps, and I am trying to work full time while I have a husband whose work takes him away from the house for the fall. But my goal every week is to remain positive and find gratitude for what is going well and "right." I have my 26 week appt this week and will get my cervix checked again for funneling and length. I am still having lots of contractions and just pray every day that I can maintain this boy for another week.

I thought I would throw my 2 cents on the not feeling crunchy enough, or like you fit in on any message board. Sometimes I feel like I straddle the line as well, but do prefer MDC message board because in general I think people here are more accepting. I think there is a difference between accepting and agreeing, too. Pregnancy, birth and child rearing is SO personal and what I have learned is that no matter how much you prepare, research and establish what is perfect and right, parenthood is a dynamic role--it changes, along with preferences ideas and sometimes even beliefs. And that is okay! What I think is of utmost importance is for women, especially pregnant women, to have a vehicle for expression and a sounding board of generally like-minded individuals whose objective is not always validation, but active listening. Sometimes, I just want someone to say, "I hear you..." We may not always agree (I'll put it right out there that coming from an extensive background in public health and working at the CDC for awhile, I am pretty sure that I will probably get the H1N1 vaccine, and my son who is at a daycare at my husband's high school, will probably get one too.). I don't exclusively cloth diaper (just at home), and I have a male OB and giving birth at a hospital called THE BABY FACTORY in Atlanta! (okay, that one was not my preference). I had to sort of accept that, and be okay with my decisions and situation. And sometimes I do feel like I need to edit some of my preferences here (e.g. my decision regarding the vaccine), but that's okay.

I certainly hope no one feels the need to hit a certain "crunchy" quota of life choices to be able to feel supported on this board--and Nicole, I do hope you have found some support on this board in the past; I know there is a coterie of women here are willing to listen!

I applaud all of you women on this board for your exceptional life experiences, positions and although may not agree 100% of the time, hope that we can all continue to focus on support and empathy!
post #14 of 85
Quote:
Originally Posted by aramat View Post
I hope everyone can just be themselves (or their normal internet-selves, really), and if someone else doesn't like it, tough titties.
See, I try - and that's what generally gets me into trouble. Since I'm a newer member here I've found I'm more likely to be on my "good" behavior since I'm not as comfortable here. My other board I've been on since pregnant with my first DD, when it was a very small board, and so I tend to be more vocal there - some people like that and some people really don't.

Plus add to that the fact that I've always been the sort of person to take a stand and take so patiently - and I enjoy a good debate. I was the person in middle school passionately backing Ross Perot when our class was studying the upcoming elections (and let's just say our class division pretty much followed the electoral votes, LOL, I think there was one other person campaigning for Perot with me). My girlfriend claims it is because I am an Aries, and I guess Aries are passionate and stubborn about their ideals? But add that quirk with pregnancy hormones and I can let things go about as well as pit bull can...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauren31 View Post
I agree that all of us women are very different and value different things. If you feel badly about something maybe it's because you feel guilty about it? I am not sure, usually that is my problem. Maybe you know that you WANT to breastfeed but know that it would be nearly impossible to pump that much while working or doing what you need to do. We all have different problems and different lives, don't let people bother you. Most women who attack your choices probably aren't very confident themselves. After all, bullies are usually hiding behind something, right?
I just get upset over people who make sweeping generalizations or assume things. For example, I had one mom tell me that I was making a "risky gamble with my unborn child's life" by not getting the H1N1 shot - despite my stating that neither my OB nor the pedi recommend it and the safety and the effectiveness have not been proven. If you want to get the shot - great - just don't attack me for my decision not to, KWIM? BFing is another sore subject for me - I have heard so many times the "oh you just didn't try hard enough" type of comments. It caused me to literally starve my second daughter (she lost a pound in 6 weeks, and that was after she had already dropped from the 75th percentile at birth down to the 10th percentile) because I had become so against formula. So our decision to do formula was never something we did for lack of trying or because it was easier. I've tried everything from eating oatmeal to prescription drugs and still can't BF full time.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Helsie View Post
NicoleS -- I feel much the same way as you (see what I just posted on the placenta thread...) I don't have a lot to say on many of the issues raised. I've wondered if it's because I work full time and have 2 kids so don't have much time to think about a lot of what's going on inside me...I am completely not ready for this baby!

I don't understand half the acronyms used, because I am a very rare message boarder -- what is CD anyway?!
CD = Cloth Diapering - I'm not against it by any means and if we were in different circumstances I'd be totally into trying it - but living in an apartment and having to go to the laundry mat it really doesn't work for it.

The whole being a mom already I think also adds to my feelings about the boards - I'm having a much harder time "bonding" with my birth month rooms this time. I already feel like I know what works for us, so there's not much up for discussion there, and then add to it that this is my 4th pregnancy in 4.5 years and a lot of the "magic" is gone this time around, if that makes any sense. Don't get me wrong - I still love this little babe and am still looking forward to meeting him - it's just hard to get excited about every little wiggle and a belly that is more of hassle than anything when I'm trying to get my day-to-day routine done.

Quote:
Originally Posted by beccabus View Post
NicoleS--your comments make me sad! I think you fit in perfectly. There is no "perfectly crunchy" mama. We are each only doing the best we can and I believe you're doing a great job! I've agreed with you a lot: ultrasounds, testing, etc! Keep talking!
Thanks - and thanks to everyone else who responded that I didn't quote. I'm just having a grumpy day I think.
post #15 of 85
Quote:
Originally Posted by Helsie View Post
NicoleS -- I feel much the same way as you (see what I just posted on the placenta thread...) I don't have a lot to say on many of the issues raised. I've wondered if it's because I work full time and have 2 kids so don't have much time to think about a lot of what's going on inside me...I am completely not ready for this baby!

I don't understand half the acronyms used, because I am a very rare message boarder -- what is CD anyway?!
Hey, I agreed with you on the placenta thread! "CD" is "cloth diapering".

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ficus View Post
I applaud all of you women on this board for your exceptional life experiences, positions and although may not agree 100% of the time, hope that we can all continue to focus on support and empathy!

Everyone has different situations. I'm a grad student (research based) and my hubby works 2nd shift, so we are planning on working around that. But, because of schedules and other life situations, I'm sure I'm making different choices than your average SAHM or WOHM because I'll be somewhere in between.

Usually, if I disagree or don't have opinions on things, I just don't contribute to a thread, (or I don't mention it in the weekly chat) and I think that dissent often gets drowned out that way on boards (just from a lot of us non-confrontational ladies). For instance, I just picked out a lovely pack-n-play that I am super-excited about, but I know many (or most?) moms on here either don't use them or think they're evil .

The reason I love the "crunchiness" here is because, to me, I don't consider these choices "hippie" or "crunchy" at all. I was raised in the Appalachians (in a holler, no less ) and many of the "hippie-ish" things like baby wearing and using herbal remedies were the things my great-grandmothers did...so I consider these mountain things.....ok, end sidebar.

--------

I'm am very high energy lately. I guess this is what everyone talks about the 2nd tri energy...too bad we're almost in the 3rd now!
post #16 of 85
Nicole, I don't consider myself all that crunchy: never even considered having my placenta, only CD'ing possibly because of the cost of diapering twins (yikes!!), bf'ing probably for the same reason, am in a hospital with a high risk OB due to complications, etc.

But what I like about this board is the general openness of different opinions. On other boards I've been on, they seem less about 'mothering' to me. But that's just my impression.

As an update to me, it looks like I'll be in the hospital for two weeks. At that point, I'll get another assessment and see where I'm at, and we'll go from there.

Ugh. I wasn't all that surprised, but it is very disheartening.

I'm on progesterone still, had my first steroid shot and will get a second one tomorrow, and will be taking some anti-contraction meds for the next 48 hours (hardly crunchy).

Starting on Sunday, they won't allow children onto any inpatient unit, so my son can't come into my room. BUT, my OB will grant me wheelchair access, so at least he can come to the hospital and I can meet him in the cafeteria or something.

As much as I don't want to be here, its best for me and the twins....

I just feel badly for my husband as well. While I couldn't do anything while I was there, at least I WAS there...
post #17 of 85
Hugs, Zevy! That sounds really, really hard. You're in my thoughts.
post #18 of 85
Poor Zevy, hang in there! The time will eventually pass for all of us.

Nicole, don't worry! If we could only be friends with those who agreed on all parenting issues, we'd have no one to talk to.

I've been having all kinds of movement too, it's great. It's much easier not to worry when I can feel how active the baby is in there.

I can still hardly walk without feeling like the baby is pushing out through my belly, and shopping this afternoon was not at all fun, but I keep drinking my water, and I'm pretty sure I'm not having too many contractions.

I am pretty sure I can start to find the head when I'm feeling my belly - I should probably stop checking for a month or two. My last one was breech, so when I keep finding this one's little head up by my belly button, I start wondering if I should start my breech exercises now... I know, I know it's far too early to worry, but I was reading spinning babies, and she keeps talking about uterine septums and needing to get babies head-down by 5 or 6 months in that case. Of course, I have no reason to think I have a uterine septum. Breech babies run in the family (both sides), but so do big heads. Ah well, I've done it once.
post #19 of 85
Well, my two cents worth might be repetitive now, sorry! I think it is important to feel like you can voice an opinion or what you have decided to do without having the push back of someone else's judgement. Usually, I just don't comment if it is something I wouldn't do or just don't see the point in discussing. Lots of people live in so many different situations and who would I be to assume that my choice I am making for me is the best for your family for parenting styles??? I would probably qualify myself as pretty crunchy but there are some things I don't think are so crunchy.

One thing in particular that makes me sad Nicole S is that anyone made you feel so bad for feeding your baby formula! I am working on my certification to be a lactation consultant so you know I am super pro breastfeeding. I first want to say it might not be for everyone and mom and baby's health come first. The first and primary job is to feed the baby! I don't know what your situation was/is but I am sorry that you ever felt bad for having to feed your baby formula. 3-6mo is awesome for breastfeeding and your babes and you will have that health benefit for the rest of their lives. I applaud you! I don't think you seem like someone who would, but please don't short change yourself because what you can do/want to do is "not long enough" or whatever " " enough.
Hmmm, so I do think the hormones are on the prowl in me too. I apologize if that was incredibly passionate!

DH rearranged all of the furniture downstairs for me this weekend because I have been so stressed with school. It looks amazing and I feel so much better. My belly is still leaping from side to side with Malachi and it is somewhat distracting during class. I have felt some guilt because I have gotten so focussed on finishing everything for school that there have been many days that I haven't really paid attention to being pregnant. I know that I pretty much won't have this type of time to focus on being pregnant ever again and I don't want to miss it. On a complaining note, my hips and back are causing me incredible pain, especially at night. I woke up at least 15 times last night just because my hips hurt so bad. Luckily I have a chiro appt on Wednesday and that has really helped in the past. Oh I can't wait!

Congrats on baby movement Katie!

And zevy- here's to hoping those active little ones stay put for a lot longer. You are such a strong mom to take it as it comes, I hope you don't get too stir crazy. I will definitely be looking for your updates!
post #20 of 85
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ambystoma View Post
For instance, I just picked out a lovely pack-n-play that I am super-excited about, but I know many (or most?) moms on here either don't use them or think they're evil .
Which one? I registered for the Graco Little Hoot one. It was about the most perfect one for a neutral registry. I ended up altering a lot of my preferences to go around it, haha!

I am still feeling awesome. I had a little setback mentally when I screwed up my checking account and got hit with overdraft fees but I'm getting my confidence back. It's funny, this is the first time in my life that I've felt like I could do anything.

I think if it weren't for the belly (complete with bouncing baby) and the varicose veins in my legs, I wouldn't even know the difference. Sure I'm a little swollen and tired but overall my health is the best it's ever been. I did get a random nosebleed last week which was weird since that's never happened to me before.

Baby has had hiccups the last two mornings, which was a riot. It was so different from the regular kicks and wiggles. This made my whole stomach bounce!

I hate being questioned about my choices, too. I hate feeling like I have to justify everything to people. My work offers a program where you get a free gift card if you enroll and you have a nurse you are supposed to talk to. She was totally thrown off by my decision to not get an ultrasound but couldn't really say anything since I had all this information to back it up.

People are shocked that I don't get weighed. Like that means I'm not doing anything to take care of myself. If I'm eating right, feeling great, and growing on schedule, what is the big deal if I choose not to know the number on the scale. But I can't explain that to most people. At least I have my husband, mom, and best friend on my side.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: February 2010
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Archives › Pregnancy and Birth Archives › Due Date Clubs 2009 - 2012 › February 2010 › Weekly chat thread Oct 26- Nov 2nd