i'm glad it worked out so well
post #21 of 22
10/30/09 at 1:01pm
See, I guess I'm really non-traditional but I just don't have this approach. I much prefer the idea of a more extendable concept of family. In fact, I think it's the desire/need to define the nuclear family as an exclusive unit that leads to so much grief. I.e., the concept of something "undermining" the integrity of the nuclear unit. Of course, if the ex-es can't get along then that's no fun for anyone but if they can then it seems to me that everyone benefits. I like that my family benefits from so many outside influences and so much involvement: my ex, my ex's family, my partner and his family, my family, all of our friends who love my children and have their own relationships with them, etc. I want to welcome and open my family to that not set boundaries on it.
If people feel differently, that's fair enough but I wouldn't say that parents are only helping children if they model that kind of marital/familial relationship. I think children can benefit from all sorts of set ups as long as there is love, support and respect involved.