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Hospital Solicitation, take two - Page 3

Poll Results: I have an intact son and....

 
  • 26% (48)
    I was asked only one time at the hospital if he would be circumcised
  • 21% (40)
    I was asked multiple times, but more as an informational rather than pressure thing
  • 4% (8)
    I was repeatedly asked and put pressure on to have it done
  • 14% (27)
    I was never asked at all--it was just assumed that it wouldn't be done unless parents requested it
  • 12% (23)
    I had a homebirth or birth center birth and was asked once, solely for care informational purposes
  • 0% (0)
    I had a homebirth or birth center birth, and midwifes asked repeatedly or applied pressure
  • 11% (21)
    I had a homebirth or birth center birth and was never asked at all about circ
  • 8% (15)
    You made tons of options and still left out my situation
182 Total Votes  
post #41 of 64
My son is 15. The nurse came to cart him off. I asked were she was going with my baby. She said "They were going to circumcise him." I told her we were not doing that. She said oh and pushed him back to were I had them. She came in when I was using the bathroom. Luckily I caught her.

My daughter 11 was suppose to be a boy The nurse checking us in asked if we were sure if it was a boy and if we were sure we didn't want him circumcised. She asked enough that I toldm, "Either way I did not care I didn't want it circumcised!" Then asked for a different nurse.
post #42 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by PuppyFluffer View Post
I went with "Tons of options yet still left my situation out".
I've had all 3 of my children with midwives and never found out the gender before birth. Before they brought up any mention of circumcision, I did. I was very clear that I was anti circ. I have used two different midwives. My first had her own independent birth center and cared for a good sized Monnonite/Amish community. She performed circumcisions because she said they culturally circ'd and she wanted to know that the babies received the best pain medication possible. I knew less about circ then than I did during my two other pregnancies. Now, I could not work with a midwife that performed circs. I just ethically couldn't.

My last two babies were born at home with the same midwife who is anti circ and does not perform them and will not perform them.
Puppyfluffer, I find that interesting that your first midwife claimed Amish people circ, because as far as I know, they dont - I dont think most Amish know what circ really is outside of biblical references. I am pretty sure Mennonites dont practice circ either. My mom used to midwife for a few Amish communities in Ohio, I remember her telling me it is not a custom. weird.
post #43 of 64
No sons here. We were anti-circ and brought it up before birth with the doctor to be sure that we knew who would be performing a circ if we had a boy, and thus we would know who to be sure knew that we did not want an accidental circ.

A buddy at work circed all three of his boys. He had no good reason, just cultural. But he commented that it was hard to find a doctor who would do the circs .... near Charlotte, NC.
post #44 of 64
Other - our first was a preemie, circs weren't performed in the NICU and they didn't help you arrange to have one performed after discharge, either. I don't remember anyone ever asking us, but it was 5 years ago and my memory is crappy.
post #45 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marsupialmom View Post
My son is 15. The nurse came to cart him off. I asked were she was going with my baby. She said "They were going to circumcise him." I told her we were not doing that. She said oh and pushed him back to were I had them. She came in when I was using the bathroom. Luckily I caught her.
OMG that completely freaks me out. What if you hadn't caught her?!?!?!? OMG!
post #46 of 64
I had DS in a hospital. I was asked twice-- once upon admission, as one of about a thousand different questions the nurse asked. She just entered my answer in her computer with no reaction whatsoever. My ped had already told me that the circ rate in that hospital was about 50/50, so I assume they were accustomed to people not wanting it. Then I was asked again by the on-call ped from our ped practice, who asked me if I wanted him to schedule DS to be cut. I said no, and he made no comment and moved on to the next question he had.

The only mention anybody made after that ever was when they gave me a fact sheet about how to care for an intact penis, with a bunch of other info they handed out at discharge. The information was all accurate.
post #47 of 64
My pregnancies were in the late 80s, two live births and two miscarriages. DH and I had discussed circ before the births, and I knew that my dad and my brother were not cut. DH is, and he said the scar still hurts sometimes.

Between there being no reason for it, and causing pain (NOT just of the passing nature they try to claim) we figured it just wasn't worth it, even if every male cousin ended up clipped. Now DS is a grown man and he hasn't mentioned any trouble, but it'd be his decision if he does get it done.
post #48 of 64
I had to answer that you didn't have an option for my situation.

I do not remember the hospital even asking us, but if they did, it was once and simply informational. However, when our first son was born the OBGYN asked us a couple times leading up to the delivery. No big deal, we said no and that seemed to be that.

But then, out of the blue, immediately after I cut the umbilical cord, he started in on me. Pacing back and forth, pratcially pleading with me, strongly arguing that I was going to creat terrible problems for my son's self esteem my leaving him intact. He wouldn't look like me, would get teased mercilessly, etc. He pressured me unprofessionally, probably because he couldn't deal with his own circumcision, who knows.

But it was the doctor, not the hospital.

Regards
post #49 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greg B View Post
I had to answer that you didn't have an option for my situation.

I do not remember the hospital even asking us, but if they did, it was once and simply informational. However, when our first son was born the OBGYN asked us a couple times leading up to the delivery. No big deal, we said no and that seemed to be that.

But then, out of the blue, immediately after I cut the umbilical cord, he started in on me. Pacing back and forth, pratcially pleading with me, strongly arguing that I was going to creat terrible problems for my son's self esteem my leaving him intact. He wouldn't look like me, would get teased mercilessly, etc. He pressured me unprofessionally, probably because he couldn't deal with his own circumcision, who knows.

But it was the doctor, not the hospital.

Regards
Yikes, what year was that ? Maybe he was intact and was the one that was so teased then after that he felt so bad in ways that he couldn't cope besides some shallow girl treatment besides. I'm just guessing on that part otherwise it could be he couldn't stand the sight of foreskin or he just wanted to make money .
post #50 of 64
I don't remember being asked more than once at the hospital, however, we were charged for a circumcision on our hospital bill.

When circumcision came up with one of our midwives during the prenatal visits, it became ugly. She became visibly upset and very defensive when we discussed the reasons that we were considering not circumcising our son. She denounced the AAP and AMA for their statement that it wasn't medically necessary and then proceeded to pass judgement on us for being "liberal democrats". In the end she stormed out of the office. I changed practices after that. There were a couple of other instances in the practice in which the midwives didn't seem to be supportive of my natural ideals so this was the last straw. I was 36 weeks pregnant and knew that it would be strange to change so late in the pregnancy but I couldn't take the chance that she would be the physician at my son's birth.
post #51 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by MommytoB View Post
Yikes, what year was that ? Maybe he was intact and was the one that was so teased then after that he felt so bad in ways that he couldn't cope besides some shallow girl treatment besides. I'm just guessing on that part otherwise it could be he couldn't stand the sight of foreskin or he just wanted to make money .
1990

I think he was Jewish, so most likely circumcised. I think he had just bought into the propoganda and/or needed to justify in his mind that it was the right thing to do since he had an amputated penis. But this is all speculation.

Regards
post #52 of 64
Thanks Greg. Who knows how doctors buy into this propganda is it because they need to try & make them do something or believe something that it was needed so they need a way to keep it around as making it believe it's benefical because to realize to have something done to you and others are fine when they are intact then they fear they had something done that wasn't needed to be done = they are damaged in that part is how they start to see it but it's a realization that many people don't want to face .
post #53 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by ursaminor View Post
Puppyfluffer, I find that interesting that your first midwife claimed Amish people circ, because as far as I know, they dont - I dont think most Amish know what circ really is outside of biblical references. I am pretty sure Mennonites dont practice circ either. My mom used to midwife for a few Amish communities in Ohio, I remember her telling me it is not a custom. weird.
My last DS was born in Orrville Ohio and the couple in the room next to me was Amish. They had their DS circ'ed.
post #54 of 64
My first two were girls, but we didn't find out DD1's gender. Nobody asked us at all if she would be circed (she would not have been, had she been a he).

With DS, I brought up circ with my home birth MW at a prenatal visit before we knew he was a he, and I saw a circ book at her office (it was an anti-circ book) so she knew we weren't circ'ing. She never brought it up again since she knew our wishes. The day he was born, we were on the phone with our pedi (he had low apgars and the mw had to call him by law) and he asked if we wanted him circed. I said no and he said "oh good, just bring him in next week then for his first checkup." At that checkup, the nurse just asked if we wanted it done, and then the pedi asked as well. It was more "you don't want it done, right" rather than "aren't you doing it?"
post #55 of 64
DS1 was born in a hospital that didn't circ on-site, his first ped didn't even ask at his 1 week well check. His next well check wasn't until 2 months old, and was with DH's old pediatrician, and he didn't ask either.

DS2 and DS3 were born at a larger medical center. The nurses asked with DS2, but not DS3 (born 5 years later). Our ped asked once or twice with DS2, but never bothered asking with DS3.
post #56 of 64
With my second son, I was asked when we checked in. Then on the day of discharge as the nurse was doing the PKU test, she tried to talk up circ. I hated that nurse, she obviously hadn't bothered to even look at my chart or birth plan before coming in my room. Like I had requested everyone wear gloves when handling my baby, and he hadn't been bathed, and she didn't wear gloves. Any way she asked if DS was circumcised and I said no. She said the doctors around here all use anesthetic and it doesn't hurt the babies. She said it only stings a little when they pee afterwards for a couple of days. Then she kept calling my baby 'she'. The hospital sends out a quality survey to patients, and I wrote about what happened and sent it back. I think she got fired.
post #57 of 64
We had a hospital birth. Honestly we hadn't put much thought into the circumcision of ds, but when he was born our doctor noticed that the foreskin wasn't quite 'enough' for her to perform it herself. She said she would like to have a pediatric urologist look at it first. So on the second day of our stay, the urologist came by and said he was taking ds for the circ. I had to stop him and ask that he examine ds in our room. He did a once-over and said it should be fine. At this point, I had decided that no one is going to make a cut when something wasn't quite 'right.' The urologist said three times he was going to do the circ, but at the end of our stay our baby boy was still intact! We did have a follow up with another pediatric urologist, but ds got a clean bill of health and we've decided to leave him intact. I hate to think that if our ob/gyn hadn't made that observation out loud, that I would have allowed it to happen, and the complications that would have most likely come of it...
post #58 of 64
Someone was wondering if the Amish circumcise their babies or not; I did some searching to see what I could find about the subject. I don't know how reliable those sources are, but here's what the answer appears to be: Circumcision is neither required nor prohibited under their beliefs, thus if you run onto some Amish men chances are some of them will be intact and some of them circumcised.
post #59 of 64
Mid pregnancy my OB brought it up by asking me what my circ plans were. I told her there is no way I would do it. She agreed with me, and said it was an unecessary procedure and was happy I didn't want it done. It was never again mentioned.
post #60 of 64
DS was born at home. I actually brought it up with my midwife when I told her I didn't want a Vit K injection. She said circ is totally not necessary and if I wasn't circing she was okay with not doing the vit K.
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