Goodbye house guests!!-RANT!!!

[kjs]

My DM and DF just left after 5 days....They were so not helpful!!!! My DM tried to do laundry, and forgot it in the washer, and just watched me finish that load, and four more. She really did not cook for us, she did not really help clean, she sat on her but and read!!! She hardly even helped with DS. I do not mean to whine, but I just do not feel nurtured by my own mother at all. I never have, I just always hold out hope .....I am an only child, and they are my only family. She is abrasive and self-involved, and it is the same every time!!!! However she insists on coming out right away, which means that all the other people and friends that do truly want to nurture our family go away for a week, since she gets super jealous of them and makes them feel like they are invasive. I am grateful that my MIL and SILs are so wonderful. Anyone else have DP that cannot seem to help you??? Or at least NOT stress you out???

[MamatoPeach]

I am glad you have a good mother in law to make up for your mom. Its so hard when our expectations/needs aren't met. At least you know that your kids will be given more love and nuturing.

[stephanie95]

I completely feel your pain...You are definitely not alone.

My parents are coming in a little less than 2 weeks. I am dreading it. They try to be helpful but they really aren't. They make little comments that are judgements but they say they are just trying to help. My dad can't sit still so I always try to have a list of projects for him. The downside is he'll veto my projects and do things he thinks are more important. Hello???? My house, my projects. Help or don't do anything. My mom really wanted to come to "help" with my DD. So I said OK and set the expectation that she would help take my kids to school etc. I thought it would just be her coming to visit but my dad is coming too. Ugh it's going to be a real pain. Plus my house is a disaster because DD throws everything and some days I just can't be bothered to put every last item away. Last night she used her markers on my floor. At least they are washable. My parents also don't agree with our sleeping habits. We co-sleep to different degrees mostly out of desperation because DD is not a good sleeper. My parents think I just have to be "firm" and discipline her to get her to sleep. That's their answer for everything. I know how I felt when they did that to me and I just don't want to do that to my kids. Ugh...now I'm getting anxious. The upside is that they only stay for 4 days.

[Serenyd]

That sucks. I would probably have been like, do you mind finishing the laundry? I've learned that if I don't ask for help, I usually don't get it.

Stephanie, DS1 used permanent marker on my MIL's linoleum (she was watching him) and never got it out. She ended up replacing it. Hope your visit goes better than you imagine it. Maybe it won't be that bad.

[shakenbake]

im so sorry hun
my take on IL's is dont come thankfully for us mine live near by so they can come see the baby and GO home! i might be rude but i cant stand my MIL so she cna see the baby and then go back to her house alone =-)

[Mommy2Liz]

I'm sorry. My mom is not a nurturer either and I really struggle with it. We are close, but she is kind of clueless and just in her own world. My mom and sister were just here helping me get my house ready. My sister has horrible PPD and a fussy five month old and she was scrubbing my floors and doing laundry and dishes while my mom played video games on the computer. It was bizarre.

They are wanting to come back after baby is born and I'm currently trying to figure out how I can invite my sister and my MIL without my mom coming. Sad huh? I totally understand your frustration.