I think my date last night went well, I had fun and I hope he did!
He picked me up early ( I love people that are on time!!) opened the doors for me, even the van door! We didn't end up seeing a movie because dinner was served crazy fast and there was over 2 hours till the movie played. So we went to a friend of his place and I met all his close friends and their wives/so and we went to a dance with them all. It was a Hunters Ball, he and all his friends hunt so it was right up his ally! We danced to the slow songs, he held my hand and had his arm around me most of the night. I feel very comfortable around him I can't describe it! I think he is a cuddly person he gives of that vibe and I really enjoy that physical connection with someone. My x never touched me, Hot neighbour had more physical contact with me last night than x did in at least 5 years. I hope we can go out again, I really enjoyed it! We kissed a little bit when he dropped me off, that was nice to, he didn't seem to push for more and I didn't offer! Gonna try that 90 day plan Steve Harvey talks about!
He picked me up early ( I love people that are on time!!) opened the doors for me, even the van door! We didn't end up seeing a movie because dinner was served crazy fast and there was over 2 hours till the movie played. So we went to a friend of his place and I met all his close friends and their wives/so and we went to a dance with them all. It was a Hunters Ball, he and all his friends hunt so it was right up his ally! We danced to the slow songs, he held my hand and had his arm around me most of the night. I feel very comfortable around him I can't describe it! I think he is a cuddly person he gives of that vibe and I really enjoy that physical connection with someone. My x never touched me, Hot neighbour had more physical contact with me last night than x did in at least 5 years. I hope we can go out again, I really enjoyed it! We kissed a little bit when he dropped me off, that was nice to, he didn't seem to push for more and I didn't offer! Gonna try that 90 day plan Steve Harvey talks about!
: I just got another letter from VGB (remember he promised his gf 9 months ago to not have any contact with me??? What a trustworthy boyfriend--i'm soooooo jealous of her) explaining finally that actually, something always felt 'off' between us and he sensed that things had no long term potential between us despite the connection and passion. So why not make a clean breakup with me last winter and say that and rip the band-aid off? Why keep coming back to my home every few days for 3 more weeks and acting in love with me? Why continue to drag out drama for another solid year, including yesterday when he says he couldn't sleep for dreams of me? Why why why why why? 
:
:
: Yes. yes. yes. yes. yes. Stay the flip away from us who are already so raw and having so much on our plates. It's so below-the-belt to offer a fool's paradise to a woman who is doing her best with a shit hand already. 
You are awesome. Thanks to you and Rosehip and sugarmoon who have chatted me off my little crisis ledge in the last 18 hours. 
).
: I'm sending him an SMS right this minute saying exactly that. (That I feel violated and concerned and confused that he didn't discuss anything with me but stalked me online instead).
and 
! Go away internet stalker!
wow! go away internet stalker!
Well I guess I must have been griping to my friend that I was bummed that I didn't get hit on and he said something to the effect of how he didn't think that was possible, that I was beautiful and blah blah blah. Anyway, I don't drink much ever so I was a little bit under and we talked out there for awhile and it was quite amusing for all of us. First of all I have to say he has AMAZING eyes. Oh my goodness. Apparently I must have been desperate for a hug because I gave him quite a few. Also, his vibe/presence gave me a sense of ease/security, almost like calming (maybe partly because he has a muscular shape). BUT the entire time he was VERY respectful and never inappropriate. My friend was not drinking and as long as we were all talking I became sober. Anyway so the bar was closing and niether of us wanted to end the conversation, so he asked us to join him at another place that would still be open. We had planned on doing that and I got his number. That didn't work out because my friend and I were getting tired and so we didn't get to see him again. He texted and then called me. I asked him if he remembered my name and he jokingly said umm.... was it... K my friend's name, etc, etc. I was like what an A$$! I said I'll talk to you later and was bummed about that. Anyway, a little bit later he texted he did remember my name and that he was sorry if that offended me. So when I got that text the next day I asked him if he wanted to make it up to me. Well we now have plans to go out for dinner and a movie and a walk lol. We have been texting and talking and alot and he seems to be a very caring person and I am definitely interested in getting to know him better. I did tell him that I would like to develop a friendship first, but that I am attracted to him. Also, at this point I'm not sure if I want any more children. He does not have any and says he wants some. At what point should I mention how I feel about that?
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