church ladies coming tomorrow or monday! freaking out!

[vermontmomma]

dh was raised in a certain christian denomination but i come from a varied spiritual background with everything from irish catholism to hinduism represented amongst my relatives, most of whom are more comfortable talking with a medium than a priest. we have only been to dh's church a few times because of his work schedule and he is unsure about whether or not it still speaks to his personal sense of spirituality.
today i was a little surprised to get a call from a woman i've never met who was talking about us with the pastor and yada yada yada she's coming over in the next day or so. i am terrified.
i'm hurrying to get the house presentable and trying to think of a casual cake or something to serve but am most worried about the meeting itself. it's a kind of conservative, red state sort of scene and i'm so far to the left that a couple of decades or centuries back i would have been blacklisted or burnt.
how can i survive this and not embarass dh horribly or get labelled as the heathen family for ever after?

[cappuccinosmom]

Well, if they're really the scary kind of "church lady", there's probably not much you can do unless you're going to enthusiasticly embrace their brand of religion.

OTOH, even conservative religious Republicans are capable of being gracious, kind, and genuinely sweet. We are not all hate-filled folks just itchin' for a fight.

I'd give them the benefit of the doubt and be a gracious hostess, and hope they'll do the same for you.

I wish you luck.

[KJoslyn78]

Unless they are coming to speak with your husband, or you are interested in their religion - i would kindly decline their offer to visit.

[vermontmomma]

i'm sure they are wonderful ladies, i just have a nagging fear of ending up on the pray for list.
it was an akward thing really, she kind of invited herself. i had a screaming baby in my arms at the moment and was a little flustered so i went along with it.

[mntnmom]

It could be great. Treat them as you would any other guest in your home. Respect their beliefs, don't showcase yours, but be honest if they ask. Look at it as a learning experience.
And as annoying as it might be, the prayer list isn't painful.... I've been on a few!!

[lilyka]

could you maybe call her back and suggest a neutral place. I amalways nervous about getting to know strangers in my home and being in a public place (like a coffee shop ) is not only a nice neutral place but a treat for me where I can relax and actually focus on my new friend.

if you are worried about getting stuck on the pray for this persons soul list maybe just give her a place to focus her prayers instead. you said you had a screaming baby..."does your church have a prayer list? maybe you could be praying for Junior. He is teething and is so misreable poor little guy...." It will give her something productive to do. people like it when you ask for prayer for something and will get you on a more neutral prayer list.

[vermontmomma]

thanks all! mothering moms always have the best advice.
i wish there was a neutral spot nearby but we're miles from nowhere here.
not showcasing the beliefs is going to be a little tricky when they see the beautiful broom dh got for me in salem over the mantle and all the crystals, books, and miscellanious.

[AbigailGrace]

I am a Christian and I hate this sort of thing. I always have. I think there is a time and a place for visiting but if you haven't asked for someone to come visit and neither has dh, then, to me, it is an intrusion. I would love to say that all Christians have "love" in mind but most of them, don't. It's a part of the religious side that I just don't like.

Yes, keep and open mind and who knows? She may actually be one of the few that is very sincere in wanting to visit with you. I pray she is. But I pray its more than just something she feels is her "duty".

Sorry I am so negative... but nothing good has ever come out of someone coming to visit me that I didn't invite...

[Aeress]

Honestly, I would call and ask what the visit is about, so i could be prepared with possible answers.

My family hasn't found my house to be "non-christian". Unless you knew my beliefs you wouldn't find anything out of place. Many of my objects have been adopted by many Christian based religions but in a slighly different manner. hehe

[wednesday2004]

Get some ideas on how to change the subject quick or how to steer the conversation in another direction. I've avoided many religious lectures that way.
Having this skill also helped me have some really good conversations with some Jahova's Witnesses that would come to the door. A few times they were there for almost 45 minutes before they realized they hadn't told me about their religion yet, lol. I just looked panicked and told them I had to be somewhere in 15 minutes when they finally remembered that's what they were there for.

[purplepaperclip]

I would be a little off centered by someone inviting themself to my house. That's really weird to me...

[AbigailGrace]

So how'd it go??

[vermontmomma]

update

they never came! it was kind of anticlimactic, no call or anything. odd, but on the plus side the house was clean (for like a day or so).

[cappuccinosmom]

[adoremybabe]

Wow, Interesting that they never came. I too feel uncomfortabe with those kinds of situations.


Glad that you enjoyed your clean house!

[lilyka]

is it possible there was some miscommunication in the plans. I mean it is odd that they would invite themselves over. maybe they weren't but it came out that way....who knows.