My runaway cat

[lil_miss_understood]

Well... Sort of a long story but here goes.
Some years ago, my BIL got a cat bc his then gf wanted it. GF and he broke up, he kept the cat. he moved in w/ dh while i was away, cat went with him... dh sold the house (to his best friend), cat stayed there bc we couldn't have pets in our rental... when we got a house, best friend gave cat back to bil.
bil moved a month ago, so he and dh decided to give cat (Qwerty) to mil. I tried to convince dh otherwise but he gave her away anyway... mil didn't really want the cat either and "let her out to go bathroom" the first night she had her.
yesterday, a month after Qwerty went missing, a cat who looks just like Qwerty showed up at our house. she(?) runs away when i go outside though. I've only seen her twice, the first time when I said "Is that QWERTY?" and best friend's gf said "it sure looks like her" and once today, after she'd eaten the food i put out to try to entice her to "stay home"

any suggestions for "reclaiming" your pet who's been missing a month much appreciated.

i should add that mil lives about 6 miles or so away, across a highway, so i think it just took her this long to get back here.

eta: and i should also add she is spayed but not declawed.

[greenmagick]

If this is her (and sounds like it is) just give her time and take it slow. She is probably really scared and confused after being on her own for a month.

Ive been talking about this here a lot lately, but this is another place where clicker training actually can help. Karen Pryor uses the example of a feral cat, but the basics are (if you can get her to stay in the general vicinity) take a can of food (or even better tuna) outside and get as close as you can without her taking off. Click (can use a bottle top like from an iced tea or a retractable ball point pen even) and flick a piece of food near her. Do this several times. If she seems receptive to the food, wait for her to just start to come close....the first hint of movement, click and treat. Continue on like that getting more and more movement getting her closer and closer. It sounds like a horrible long process, but really isnt. It very well take more than one session.

I think there is a youtube video that probably explains this much better.

[lil_miss_understood]

Originally Posted by greenmagick

If this is her (and sounds like it is) just give her time and take it slow. She is probably really scared and confused after being on her own for a month.

Ive been talking about this here a lot lately, but this is another place where clicker training actually can help. Karen Pryor uses the example of a feral cat, but the basics are (if you can get her to stay in the general vicinity) take a can of food (or even better tuna) outside and get as close as you can without her taking off. Click (can use a bottle top like from an iced tea or a retractable ball point pen even) and flick a piece of food near her. Do this several times. If she seems receptive to the food, wait for her to just start to come close....the first hint of movement, click and treat. Continue on like that getting more and more movement getting her closer and closer. It sounds like a horrible long process, but really isnt. It very well take more than one session.

I think there is a youtube video that probably explains this much better.

Yeah, right now I'm just hoping to keep her hanging around the house and yard and stuff so I put her food in an outside room (hard to explain... it's a finished shed/room she stayed in every weekend when BIL was away.) so that *she* knows it's there but hopefully other animals won't realize it is. She used to get into fights with the neighbourhood cats and I'm REALLY hoping they don't show up anytime soon bc I'm afraid they'll scare her off if they do since I'm not certain she still thinks of it as "her turf" anymore.
Every couple of hours, I've been going outside calling her, not actually expecting her to come, just hoping she hears that I want her here... Sounds really silly, probably but... Usually I check her food, bring her bowl out, fill it from inside, and call her and talk to her while I put the bowl back...
Poor kitten.

[lil_miss_understood]

Good or bad?

I have her "trapped".
I went down to check her food and she was in the room. I closed the door and sat down and talked to her for a bit. Then, I left and got her litter box and brought it back. I thought for a minute that she got out while I was bringing in her box, but she was hiding in one of the cupboards. As soon as I found her, I closed the cupboard door again, speaking as reassuringly as I could. Then I went and got more food to refill her bowl. I talked to her for a minute longer, then left the room, turning on the heat for her when I left. I have her litter box on one side of the room and her bed and food in the opposite corner.
I feel terrible trapping her but scared to let her out again, especially after she's been "trapped".
I plan to go down again later and talk to her some more... I'd take her some tuna but I'm pretty sure she won't care about it, having just ate.

[greenmagick]

I thnk trapping is a good idea. For starters, its safer for her. Good luck!!

[lil_miss_understood]

She ate tuna in front of me tonight. Up until now, she's been mostly hiding in the cupboard. I leave small amounts of dry food for her, not enough for her to feel "full" but a little (about 1/4 cup, 4-6 times a day). I know she's hungry. I left her a little more tonight as a reward for eating in front of me. I'm hoping that as we progress, it will take less and less time for her to eat in front of me and then eventually no time and then maybe she'll start coming closer and letting me get closer. I'm not allowed closer than about 4 feet right now without either being hissed at or her running to hide.
If she doesn't continue to eat in front of me, I will probably give her a proper bowl of food tomorrow night anyway. I hate her being hungry.
eta: hope you don't mind me updating as we progress.

[lil_miss_understood]

Someone let her out. I don't know who but I'm SO UPSET. She wasn't taking as long to come out from hiding (in the cupboards) and was coming closer and closer.
Now what?