Cranky and feeling defective

[Krystal323]

hey all. haven't been on much, because I keep alternating between having days of "OMG it HAS to be today, SO many contractions!" to days of "WTF, I can't BELIEVE it didn't happen yesterday/last night."

I even had the baby clothes and blankets in the dryer, and the hot oil for compresses in the crockpot the other day...and then the contrax just kinda stayed in a holding pattern when I got too exhausted to sit up with them

I feel like something is wrong with me--I keep hearing about these women who wake up with contrax in the middle of the night and they just *know* it's labor, and things progress in a timely manner, no big deal. WHY can't this be me???

MY body has to fake me out numerous times until I'm completely effing insane and thinking labor will never REALLY start. My DH made a good point--he thinks maybe stress is what sends me over the edge into real labor, LOL!

So, if nothing happens by Tuesday (40w6d), I have to start driving 1 hr away and paying $85 a pop for NSTs every 3 days. Realistically, I have NO money for even one of these NSTs. All I have is medicaid, and if I show up at a local hospital, all they'll do is admit me for induction since I'm already "sooo late"

Taking castor oil tomorrow morning. Wish me luck ladies.

[ExuberantDaffodil]

Good luck, sweetie. I'm cranky, too (and evidently getting on some people's nerves )

I wish the best for you, and hopefully the castor oil doesn't.... backfire (sorry for the pun!)

If you go into labor, send your vibes my way, ok?

[notjustmamie]

Sending effectual labor your way! I hope you're holding your baby soon.

[starc]

Sending labor vibes your way.

[Lily's_Mom]

Good luck! Now that you posted this, you should have your baby within the next day or so.

[jess152]

You need something to take your mind off it!

-Make a soup
-write out your xmas card list
-re-wash all baby clothes & blankets
-bake a batch of cookies
-start a baby album
-wash the baseboards in the bathroom
-go out for a spicy meal
-have a glass of wine with dinner

It will happen!

[crunchy_mama]

Good luck to you! I know it is so hard at the end, I hope you are holding your baby soon!

[Sleepyheaded_Mama]

I feel soooo defective as well. I seriously dwell on that feeling probably way more than I should, but it's hard not to when I know full well that at this point my sister will have already lost her mucous plug, began her full-tilt nesting, and can pretty much count on one hand how many days she has left until her water will break and labor will begin. After x amount of hours have passed she will have a flawless vaginal delivery and hold her perfect newborn in her arms. Our DDC is averaging somewhere around 3 babies born/day, most following the same predictable, flawless sequence with the usual individual variations. Me? No such luck. And it doesn't help that physically I am in more pain right now with this baby than I have ever been, historically, with any of the others. I wish just once my body could get this right.