Freaking out a little

[bright_eyes]

Can someone please reassure me that what I am feeling is normal? I noticed the other day that my gut was looking bigger than I remember it being lately and when I feel it, it isn't very 'jelly' anymore but quite firm. It got me thinking that maybe I'm one of those unlucky people who got pregnant immediately after childbirth. (Dh and I have only done something once- he's been out of town for the past 2 weeks, so I'd be very surprised if I were). So I felt my cervix and this is why I am FREAKING OUT! It feels just like it did when I got pregnant this last time. It's open a little, which I know is normal. But inside the space, there is something there. With this last pregnancy, I assumed what I was feeling was the mucous plug and what I am feeling feels the same. Please someone tell me that there is supposed to be something there, that feeling something there does not mean I am pregnant! What should my cervix feel like after having a baby? I am worried sick about this. I don't know what I'll do if I really am pregnant. I know I'll lose my milk supply during pregnancy and that worries me a lot.

[dachshundqueen]

Call your OB and ask for a beta.

Liz

[2boyzmama]

Oh goodness! Well, my cervix feels very different now than when pregnant. Now it's hard and long, and yes, still a bit open. It's also quite a bit lower than before (in fact, I was going to start a thread on that...)

You said your husband has been gone for the past 2 weeks, how long before he left did you DTD? Because if it was right before he left, then you'd only be about 4 weeks, way too early to feel your uterus. If it was a while before that...well... Typically the uterus can be felt outside the pelvic cavity around 12 weeks (is that right?? I think so) but it can be felt earlier in subsequent pregnancies, particularly two close together.

A HPT might not be accurate since you're post partum, if you're truly worried, I'd call your OB.

And as much of a shock this must be to you, I have to admit to being a little excited You might be pregnant!!!! EEEEKK!!!

[bright_eyes]

It totally feels different from the majority of my pregnancy. I found out I was preggo this last time when I was 4 weeks along and was so surprised (we'd been ttc for the last 14 months so it was hard to believe it had finally happened) that I kept checking my cervix. It felt long and hard at the beginning, but was slightly opened, which I knew was normal since I'd had a baby already. And in the opening is where I felt something soft that I had assumed was my mucous plug. So that is what I am feeling now. As my pregnancy progressed, my cervix changed completely and became really soft and high.

We dtd at 5 weeks postpartum to the day. I had wanted to wait until 6 weeks but he was going out of town for 2 weeks so I decided not to wait. It is now 7 weeks 2 days postpartum.

I didn't gain much weight this pregnancy (only 25 lbs) and I've lost all but 5. And I am pretty thin. Last pregnancy I gained 50lbs and was 20 lbs more than what I was when I got preggo this last time. So my jelly belly took a long time to shrink. So maybe my gut feels hard because there isn't a lot of fat there? I'm pretty sure what I am feeling is not my uterus. This last pregnancy, I had a baby bump long before you could feel my uterus, so it could be the case again if I were pregnant.

I'm mostly just worried about what I am feeling in my cervix. This last pregnancy, breast feeding started to really hurt and I couldn't stop peeing at night within a week of conceiving and none of those things are happening right now. But I know not every pregnancy gives the same symptoms.

Oh, and I don't have an OB or even a family doctor. I had a midwife and the office is closed today so if I wanted to talk to one of the midwives, I'd have to call the on call number and I feel silly doing that. I might go see if i can fine a dollar store that sells pregnancy tests because I'd had to spent so much on a test and find out that it is negative and I didn't need to test.

I did start finding my pants getting tight within 3 weeks of conception this last time, so I should know pretty soon if I am pregnant. I just want to know now so that I can start pumping. My goal would be to fill my freezer with as much milk as I could to prepare for the eventual loss of my breast milk.

[bright_eyes]

I think the only I want to know is whether or not what I am feeling in my cervix is normal or not. Can anyone else feel something in their cervix?

[2boyzmama]

I haven't felt inside mine, just the outside, and just enough to notice that it's long, hard, and slightly open (like a slit). Sorry, can't help you about feeling anything in there...

And you might be surprised about your milk...I nursed through both my last two pregnancies, and my milk never totally dried up, although granted I was much further post partum when I got pregnant.

This pregnancy, I had to pump for a weekend when I was 12-13 weeks, and I was very sick with a bad sinus infection, and Connor had just turned 2 years old. I still got an ounce from each side every time I pumped (I only pumped twice a day or so since that's all he was nursing at the time). I was surprised to have that much milk considering how old he was, how sick I was, and how pregnant I was.

[confustication]

My boys are closely spaced (14 months) and I never completely lost my milk supply- it took a brief hit early on, and dipped more significantly in the last month or so.

As for the cervix- tbh I'm still so sore that the prospect of checking scares me. :/

[bright_eyes]

Well, I lost my milk at 12 weeks pregnant this last time around. Ds2 nursed the entire pregnancy, despite there being no milk. All I had was a tiny but of this clear, brownish stuff. It sort of looked like colostrum but it wasn't. So I don't want to bank on not losing my milk.

I would like to think that since I am tandem nursing that there is no way I can be pregnant. I didn't even get my first AF back until ds1 was 13 months and then I didn't get pregnant until he was 2 1/2 (we started trying when AF came back). But I was drinking soy milk the whole time and when I cut it out, my cycles seemed to regulate and then I got pregnant so I can't help but feel that the soy milk was messing with my hormones. Not that I am not drinking it anymore, I don't know if my body will respond the same way to hormones that bfing produces.

I think maybe I will just call the on call midwife. I hope she won't mind me calling her- I technically am not even a client anymore.

[bright_eyes]

Still haven't called the midwife and still haven't taken a test but I am really starting to worry now.

My gut seems slightly bigger today and my cervix is now way higher than it was, softer, and closed tight- I can't even get a finger tip in it like I could.

I don't know what I'll do if I am pregnant, I really don't know how I'll be able to handle 2 pregnancies so close together. And I am worried sick about my breast milk.

[kismetbaby]

If you can call your MW so you can stop torturing yourself with wondering/worrying! And let us know. . .

[bright_eyes]

Dh is going to bring home a pregnancy test today so I will know by the end of the day.

[StrongFeather]

Originally Posted by bright_eyes

Dh is going to bring home a pregnancy test today so I will know by the end of the day.

I hope for the best for you!

[2boyzmama]

Will a HPT be accurate??? YOu might still have hormones from the last pregnancy, I don' tknow that I would trust a HPT.

[bright_eyes]

Originally Posted by 2boyzmama

Will a HPT be accurate??? YOu might still have hormones from the last pregnancy, I don' tknow that I would trust a HPT.

I didn't even think about that. So would a blood test be best? Maybe I should walk over to the walk in clinic.

I just want to know now! I feel silly to call my mw because she just told me last week that I shouldn't use bfing as birth control because it doesn't always work.

[2boyzmama]

Originally Posted by bright_eyes

I didn't even think about that. So would a blood test be best? Maybe I should walk over to the walk in clinic.

I just want to know now! I feel silly to call my mw because she just told me last week that I shouldn't use bfing as birth control because it doesn't always work.

I think that if you HPT is negative, then you're not pregnant. But if it's positive, then get a blood test. And when you get the blood test, tell them you need a quantitative HcG, not just a pregnancy test. Because they should be able to tell the difference between post partum hormone levels and pregnancy hormone levels. I would think anyway.

[StrongFeather]

Don't feel bad calling your MW. People make mistakes, and things happen. She shouldn't say anything to you to make you feel bad. But I agree with needing to know NOW. If it were me I'd go to the clinic.

[Lula's Mom]

I would also be worried about my milk; I lost it both times in the first trimester too.

If you are pregnant, maybe you could look into donor milk. After I had my second baby, I pumped and shipped milk across the country to a MDC mama with low supply. I'll bet you can find people in your area who'd help you out.

[saffrongirl]

Hope you're getting some answers. Kup!

[2boyzmama]

thinking of you!

[bright_eyes]

So I took a hpt yesterday. I wanted to go to the dr. and get a blood test but couldn't get motivated to hop on the bus with both kids (it's dh's week to have the car). So I had a friend pick me up a test and figured if it was positive I could still go and do a blood test.

It was negative!!! Which is such a big relief! Although I still have a hard time not thinking that maybe somehow I really am pregnant. Mostly because I just don't remember my gut/tummy looking so big. I wish I had paid more attention to it before this all. When I look down, it looks way bigger than I remember and then I worry that it's getting bigger and I really am pregnant. It is so irrational- maybe it's just the postpartum hormones that have got me all paranoid/worried.

One thing I have learned from this is that there is no way that I can do the lam method of birth control- I am way too worried about it not working this time (even though it worked really well after we had ds1). So for my peace of mind, we'll have to do more, which kind of is disappointing because no other method is very appealing. But it's still worth using something so that I don't have to stress.